Voicemail, Room 603 [Open to all]

[ihatedenmark]

Hi, you've reached the personal voicemail of Hamlet. I'm not here right now because obviously I have far more important things to do with my time than to sit around and wait for ignorant peons to phone. If you simply must contact me, leave a message after the tone. If this is my Uncle Claudius, please do tell me how you are and where I can find you. If this is Horatio, it's in that place we went to that Tuesday in March. You know where. If this is anyone else from Elsinore, yes, I'm still alive, I'm studying hard, and please send more Kroner. If this is one of my classmates or teachers, leave a detailed message, and if I deem it important enough, I'll get back to you.

*a loud noise*

Duo, must you keep--

*BEEP*