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[sanne47]

I know that places like proanorexia abound with posts like this, but I've never actually had a chance to disucss this with a more intelligent group :)

My question is this: Boyfriends / girlfriends?  How do we deal with them?

I know that I can't eat in front of the guy I just started dating, and the whole "why aren't you eating / not want pizza" issue

Comments

[hxartcore]

i've told mine everything now. i kept it from him for about a year and a half and he started slowly piecing things together, and i told him the whole "story" about 6 months ago. he's not understanding, but he doesn't hate me for it. he just doesn't know why i can't "just eat" and "be healthy". then again, i think if i didn't have him i'd never eat, because that's how it was before him. i get guilted into eating with him, make him feel better. i lie to him, and it makes me feel like shit.

[sanne47]

It's hard for me to imagine that mine-- being the ridiculously solictious guy he is-- would be able to do anything other than alert therapists/ doctors/ counselors/ parents/ all of the above.

I would tell him if that weren't the case, but... it is.

I'm not sure which is worse.

[sanne47]

ETA: I love your icon.

[hxartcore]

i'm glad mine hasn't gotten to that "i'm really worried" stage yet, because i think he is close to telling my mom. she asked him a few days ago if i did have an eating disorder and he told her he didn't know, probably only because i was giving him an evil glare behind her back. ;x

[sanne47]

That's awful. But he sounds loyal, at least. Maybe not in the most healthy, helpful way in the world... but nonetheless.

That's exactly why the whole "full disclosure" thing doesn't work for me. I'm afraid to tell anyone anything, though, so...

[hxartcore]

yeah. he started "noticing" things and then he asked me. i kept denying any kind of "food issues" he talked about until one day i was just like "i've had an eating disorder for 5 years."
it was hard but it's easier now to explain why i'm not eating. i'm not on drugs, i don't have some kind of disease that causes loss of appetite, i have an eating disorder. he was angry at first, that i wouldn't "stop", so i was just like listen.. the day you hate yourself so much that you feel the need to deprive yourself of one thing that can keep you alive, you can talk. but not now.