Who's got a fuckin problem?
This has been an issue that I have brushed off my shoulder for some time because I really dont give 37 shits what most of you have to say sometimes. But over the past few years....mainly since I have been married, many of my long time friends from my youth have abandoned our friendship but continued friendships with others from our rather large
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I have tried to stay in you and your families life as much as I can...with out controlling it.....I see you makeing your choices in life and it kills me and breaks my heart....but I take a breath and try to concentrate on the fact that your an adult, their your choices to make.....I remember when you where so smart that your speach pattern at that age studden teachers, you were to quick to answer and the teachers wouldn't call on you anymore, it wasn't fair to the other kids.....but I know that's all old shit too....Your an adult, I good hearted adult. Cliff made the comment about the people in your home, I know that you have them because you can look past the drugs...I know that you do drugs, which helps look past them even easier...but when you two had a child....the only drug in your house should have been Nightquil. I mean patting people down at the Front gate, no Drugs aloud! But you didn't. Cliff is right about a couple of thins....drugs are the reason we all slowly slipped away. And I have talked to you about drugs probely every single time I knew for fact that you were doing them, or I seen you have some. Agreed they were not all introvention type of talks, but I always bugged you about them, hopeing to appeal to the intelliegent side of you....but you get clean for a little while, get angry at the world, and find a joint....
Do you remember walking to Cliff's house from Sancatuary, just me and you, and you promised that your home would never be close to what your parents home looked like? Well Daniel, Your home looks like theirs did last time I was there. Well I know your saying it does not....Stop reading, turn off a couple of lights, and just look around your house for a min or two....It's wasn't as bad as it was when I was there...but you had told me that you had been cleaning for two days...................so..what do you think? Do you see a simliar sight. I did when I was there. Everything to your room, to the dishes, to the front yard............."hey daddy, I found my floor"...remember telling me that? Breaks my heart...........
But Daniel....Mer....you guys are adults.....so I try to stay out of your descsions, because they are not mine to control.......But daniel knows the rules....all he has ever had to do is ask me for help, and he would get it. Every single time he has asked for it, he got. Money, beating someone up, it didn't matter....Love all three of you. I just want to help you make the right choices and not have to make them for you.....all you gotta do is ask. And be willing to improve you life......
Night guys............
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