(no subject)
A most delicate matter:
Journal, there is only one topic worth going over. That is the condition of the women around me. Heres how we kick it off. Jen's back, again, saw her at the house last night. Was it just fate that we met up there or some bad omen? Anyway we basically ignored each other until the last possible moment. That happens alot to us. For a refreshment of memory journal, Jen was my first love, back when I was in the SS. I thought it was going to last forever. It didn't she ended up leaving. I caught her a few months back and all she said was things had gotten too perfect for her. Needless to say, that reason plain made me mad. Now just moments ago journal. She told me the real story, crying infront of me. I didn't know what to think at first. I'm so confused again journal. Why does this always seem to happen. She kissed me..right before I stalked out. I don't know what to think about this, what to think about anything anymore. She was my first, we were together in my rougher days...but you have to move on right? Someone...please tell me what I'm supposed to do about this. I love Alexis...I do, I know I do. But to say I don't have feelings for Jen anymore would be an utter lie..and journal, I'm tired of lying to myself. It makes me uneasy just thinking about the future, it feels like everything is pointing in the wrong direction again. Whats worse...is I just want to be alone...its eatting at me. I don't know what to do....I'm lost...again.
Journal, there is only one topic worth going over. That is the condition of the women around me. Heres how we kick it off. Jen's back, again, saw her at the house last night. Was it just fate that we met up there or some bad omen? Anyway we basically ignored each other until the last possible moment. That happens alot to us. For a refreshment of memory journal, Jen was my first love, back when I was in the SS. I thought it was going to last forever. It didn't she ended up leaving. I caught her a few months back and all she said was things had gotten too perfect for her. Needless to say, that reason plain made me mad. Now just moments ago journal. She told me the real story, crying infront of me. I didn't know what to think at first. I'm so confused again journal. Why does this always seem to happen. She kissed me..right before I stalked out. I don't know what to think about this, what to think about anything anymore. She was my first, we were together in my rougher days...but you have to move on right? Someone...please tell me what I'm supposed to do about this. I love Alexis...I do, I know I do. But to say I don't have feelings for Jen anymore would be an utter lie..and journal, I'm tired of lying to myself. It makes me uneasy just thinking about the future, it feels like everything is pointing in the wrong direction again. Whats worse...is I just want to be alone...its eatting at me. I don't know what to do....I'm lost...again.