my heart is anywhere but here.
today i looked out the window and all i saw was winter.
i feel like i'm deliberately ruining all my friendships. tonight i had chinese food alone. as i walked back to school i thought that i should get used to this solitude. i really want to talk to a few people but my ego and pride prevent me from doing so. & then everything you say makes me want to hit you with a chair & i apologize.
i've been making phone calls but NO ONE CALLS ME BACK. which in my head is a big fuck you. so thanks everyone, at least i know how we stand and i wasn't making up the part where we stopped being friends.
so tonight, i feel alone. and i'm probably just overdramatizing this as i do everything else but i'm moody and sad and everything everyone says makes me feel so small.
why do my emotions have to be so inconsistent?
i feel like i'm deliberately ruining all my friendships. tonight i had chinese food alone. as i walked back to school i thought that i should get used to this solitude. i really want to talk to a few people but my ego and pride prevent me from doing so. & then everything you say makes me want to hit you with a chair & i apologize.
i've been making phone calls but NO ONE CALLS ME BACK. which in my head is a big fuck you. so thanks everyone, at least i know how we stand and i wasn't making up the part where we stopped being friends.
so tonight, i feel alone. and i'm probably just overdramatizing this as i do everything else but i'm moody and sad and everything everyone says makes me feel so small.
why do my emotions have to be so inconsistent?