The Onion highlights

[ignacio]

Long-Awaited Beer With Bush Really Awkward, Voter Reports
http://www.theonion.com/content/node/42590

Metal Council Convenes To Discuss 'Metal Hand Sign' Abuse
http://www.theonion.com/content/node/42365

Area Man Well-Versed In First Thirds Of Great Literature
http://www.theonion.com/content/node/30996

Visiting Gore Calls Pennsylvania 'A Hellhole'
http://www.theonion.com/content/news/visiting_gore_calls_pennsylvania_a

John Edwards Vows To End All Bad Things By 2011
http://www.theonion.com/content/news/john_edwards_vows_to_end_all_bad

Black Gospel Choir Makes Man Wish He Believed In All That God Bullshit
http://www.theonion.com/content/node/28174

Darling, You Were Well Worth The Nine Goats
http://www.theonion.com/content/node/33960