as you wish.
tlc day is depressing because it reminds me how "unsmart" ive become. i know i can put in so much more effort and im not doing my best, for sure, but i have no motivation for it. i just cant wait for winter break, for when, two weeks, i can at least not worry about anything school related. yes, i got a D but its going up very soon and very fast if i can help it.
i might very well be doing indoor guard (and perc if we can do both). we'll see. im kind of terrified and excited at the same time.
some guys need to be kicked because they are either ignorant, or worse, not making amends even though they are aware they are causing pain. i hate watching that- i almost feel like im involved. =[
friday night im getting my haircut, and i guess highlighted a little too, just because it needs a trim and im too scared to dye it. besides, i figure once a blonde, always a blonde, and its just going to stay that way. *shrug* im then going to becca's game and cheering her on. katie (davis), spencer and I and whoever else are going back to her house for the night and then, of course, an early morning rise for another competition. woo.
today, like katie pointed out, was a fantastic day. i can deal with it being a little colder, but it just gives a completely different atmosphere to the day, and for a short while, things feel alright and they way they feel they should be. grades shouldnt matter, arguments shouldnt disrupt your joy, pain shouldnt suppress your love, rejection shouldnt change your confidence, mistakes shouldnt scar your grace, but somehow we let it. those moments just seem like those times when God reminds you that you are loved, if by no one else, by Him and that it's all that matters. it's a true romance that defeats all others and is utterly impossible to explain unless you have experienced it. He is the King and you are His daughter, the most precious Princess.. but a true life fantasy instead of a hopeless dream, and we should hope in His joy, His love, His comfort, and His promises. like im one to talk, I always depend on school, relationships, guys, skill and success to make me happy, when it's all prioritized wrong. i just have the worst problem ever with patience.. because though I have faith I can't sit still and wait for everything to fall into place.. and consequently i miss out on the good things that could happen in my life, because Im too busy worrying. ah, but dont worry about tomorrow, for today's worries is sufficient in itself. its not easy, but its what i strive for. oh well, end of inspired rant. =]
i love my friends, more than i ever thought. =]]]]]]]]]
you are so amazing to me.
We were younger then, you and me,
full of dreams, weren’t we?
I went my way, you went yours,
where did you go, dear?
Someone said you had left the life we lived together then
This is my way of reaching out ‘cause I remember…
This is what I want to say to you
If I had one chance to speak to your heart
You are loved
More than you could ever know
This is what I want to say to you
If I had one chance to tell you something
You are loved
More than you can imagine
If I told you would you believe,
the narrow road, I did not leave
If I told you would you understand
that I’ve found truth
Are you jaded? Are you hurting now?
How I wish that I could tell where your heart’s at…
can you see? Mine has found - home
Not sure if I’ve, made it clear enough
It’s not my love I sing about
Everybody asks, “Is God good?”
I believe, He is
In fact I know, He is
You are loved more than you can
Imagine.