I really should be doing school work....
I took some time today to think about where I've been..where I am...and where I want to be....who I want to be with...and who I want to love. Here are my thoughts
I used to think I was so mature and so much "wiser" for my age...but in all reality...I'm just a scared little kid. Don't get me wrong...I believe I've come very far in this life...but I have miles of hills to climb. My one teacher wrote me probably the best letter of recomendation I could ever receive and when I read it I was completely startled by all of the things she listed as accomplishments. the other day I went down to her and we were having a conversation and she told me she was proud because of how far I've come. When I first moved into my fathers house she was my english teacher...8th grade. She told me that the miserable little girl I was grew into a very strong outstanding person. I just wanted to cry right there on the spot because the strong person she sees during the day is the same person that cries every night. That's the same person who over extends herself and just wants to shrivel into a little ball or crawl under a rock because the pressure makes her feel like she cant breathe. I feel like everything I've been working for...everything in school is falling apart. I've worked so hard for the past four years to get good grades so I can get scholarships to go to any school I want...and I cant even get fuckin finacial aid. I feel like the relationship I've been working on is falling apart and I dont know why. I'm scared.
My Heart
I can't take my mind off you
So I sit here and wonder
What draws me to you?
You say you love me, but is it true?
I can't fathom the thought
of being without you
I'm your friend
your love
your confident
Hold me--tell me it's gonna be okay
I need you in my life
There's no other way
I miss you and love you
please say the same
I used to think I was so mature and so much "wiser" for my age...but in all reality...I'm just a scared little kid. Don't get me wrong...I believe I've come very far in this life...but I have miles of hills to climb. My one teacher wrote me probably the best letter of recomendation I could ever receive and when I read it I was completely startled by all of the things she listed as accomplishments. the other day I went down to her and we were having a conversation and she told me she was proud because of how far I've come. When I first moved into my fathers house she was my english teacher...8th grade. She told me that the miserable little girl I was grew into a very strong outstanding person. I just wanted to cry right there on the spot because the strong person she sees during the day is the same person that cries every night. That's the same person who over extends herself and just wants to shrivel into a little ball or crawl under a rock because the pressure makes her feel like she cant breathe. I feel like everything I've been working for...everything in school is falling apart. I've worked so hard for the past four years to get good grades so I can get scholarships to go to any school I want...and I cant even get fuckin finacial aid. I feel like the relationship I've been working on is falling apart and I dont know why. I'm scared.
My Heart
I can't take my mind off you
So I sit here and wonder
What draws me to you?
You say you love me, but is it true?
I can't fathom the thought
of being without you
I'm your friend
your love
your confident
Hold me--tell me it's gonna be okay
I need you in my life
There's no other way
I miss you and love you
please say the same