Mentally, anyway. I don't have access to explosives. That's probably a good thing.
I'm not sure who to blame for these.
sansets and
_unhurt_ seem likely targets, but if they call "not it" fast enough, the blame may affix itself to
lamentables. Regardless, I was kept entertained and out of trouble for one more day.
Anyway. Several universes destroyed by sex. Utterly tiny and mostly, but not entirely, crack.
Torchwood
Ianto initially thought the white flashes of light were -- well, not physical, external flashing lights. Then the klaxon started.
He froze, his hand tightening in Jack's hair.
"Jack, whose office did you say this was?"
Weiss Kreuz
Crawford saw it coming. He planned out various contingencies and exigencies, trying to force his gift down another path and hitting one dead end after another. He didn't have time for this, he had more pressing problems, he --
"Mein Gott, just let it," Schuldig finally said, leaning in the doorway and rubbing at his temple. "You're giving me a headache."
Crawford focused on now, on him, and something must have leaked through, because Schuldig blinked. "Oh. Oh." He smiled, and it was all sharp knowledge and mayhem and just the smallest touch pleased. "Come here, then -- we've hours yet."
Harry 'Destroyer of Worlds' Potter
"It's not what it looks like, Harry," Hermione asserted in a rush.
"Right," agreed Ginny.
"Actually," admitted Ron, "it probably is."
Black Books
"Wait, she wants to go home with you?" Manny could not have sounded more incredulous if he'd tried -- and believe him, he tried.
Bernard nodded, a goofy, beatific smile written across his face.
"And she's a she?" Fran craned her neck for a look, but the girl in question appeared... completely normal, as she paid her tab. "How drunk is she?"
"Sober as a judge," Bernard crowed. Magistrate Kendell chose that moment to trip over nothing visible and careen into their table before weaving his way to the bar. "More so," he revised.
"Ready?" she asked, stepping up behind Bernard.
Bernard practically leapt to his feet, and they left the bar arm in arm. Behind them, Manny and Fran traded dubious looks. "There's no way this can end well," Fran said and ordered another round.
Supernatural
Dean approved of any number of sounds during sex: moans, groans, gasps, creaking springs and banging headboards. Laughter was not high on the list -- at least, not when it clearly came from across the room. His eyes snapped open. Over Castiel's shoulder, he spied Zachariah, still laughing, before he was obscured by wings. Not the shadowy impression of wings Dean had seen once before. Wings, real wings superimposed over the cheap furniture of the motel room -- no, more like the room was superimposed over them, like they were more real than the room, more real than anything Dean had ever seen, so real they hurt to look at --
"Thank you, Dean. We couldn't have broken the final seal without you."
-- but Castiel's face transfigured by ecstasy into something inhuman was no easier to witness. Dean closed his eyes.
Psych
"What's the worst that could happen?" asked Shawn.