Can love only go so far?
I love meshari, no doudt about it...but I have noticed that I dont feel that "I want to touch you! I want to kiss you!" feeling anymore. It's not because I don't love him anymore. Its that everytime I get near him I smell nasty cigs. disgusting. rotting. black. tar. dying. nast. It's not attractive at all. And I have told him up front and clear don't do that around me...so he goes outside and what not but I can still smell it on him. He will chew gum but I have come to assoiate gum with smoking, the same with when he dissappears for ten mins and he comes back and pratically runs for the bathroom to brush his teeth.
He says he wants to quit...someday. In my head he is saying "I really don't give a fuck what you think or what I'm doing so back off!"
And again this also goes for him "trying" to be healthier. Its not just a losing weight. Its eating better, working out, just living a better life. Well lets just say he is barely doing anything in the matter. It's always too late. Thats really far. I'm tired today. Chips are light and I dont want to soil my dinner.
So he is eating everything, drinking gallons of iced tea (which is SOOOOO much better than soda but water "just doesn't do it") and he is smoking like a hotel fire and playing broaderlands like its his job.
I'm just not attracted to someone like that.
I try really hard to eat better and do the extra healthy steps, because I want to look and feel good, plus the natural benifit of living longer! But with him not giving a shit about his body...why the fuck should I care about someone who doesn't care about themselves?
He says he wants to quit...someday. In my head he is saying "I really don't give a fuck what you think or what I'm doing so back off!"
And again this also goes for him "trying" to be healthier. Its not just a losing weight. Its eating better, working out, just living a better life. Well lets just say he is barely doing anything in the matter. It's always too late. Thats really far. I'm tired today. Chips are light and I dont want to soil my dinner.
So he is eating everything, drinking gallons of iced tea (which is SOOOOO much better than soda but water "just doesn't do it") and he is smoking like a hotel fire and playing broaderlands like its his job.
I'm just not attracted to someone like that.
I try really hard to eat better and do the extra healthy steps, because I want to look and feel good, plus the natural benifit of living longer! But with him not giving a shit about his body...why the fuck should I care about someone who doesn't care about themselves?