Today was pretty upsetting
We went to the hospital to see my grandmother today. I didn't want to go. I told my mom last night I didn't want to go, but she tried to guilt me into it.
"If something happens to your grandmother when she goes in for surgery you're gonna wish you had seen you."
No, I wouldn't have. 'Cuz then my last memory of her would have been happy. She was getting better, at home, and happy. If something happened to her, that's what I would've wanted to remember, not this.
We got the hospital and we waited in the lobby for my dad to park the car, and I started crying and shaking. Then we started up into the patient wings and I was freaking out. I'm passing all these people with tears running down my face and I just wanted to die. When we got to the room, I couldn't go in. For a minute my family didn't notice I hadn't gone in the room, and my Dad came out and asked why I was crying. Eventually he got me into the room, my grandma wasn't in yet, and I just started crying again. And my mom's like "Stop crying, you have to be strong for Grandma. If she sees you crying, she'll cry" and all I could say is "That's why I didn't wanna come here."
Luckily, my dad got me started talking about police and I calmed down. Eventually, my grandma came back and she was a mess. It was really hard for me not to start crying again, especially when she started showing my mom the incision from her last surgery.
I did eventually manage to show her the pictures from prom (finally). She liked them a lot. She was looking at them and she looks at my mom and says "They really like eachother, don't they?" and later when she handed the pictures back to me, she said "They really love eachother."
"If something happens to your grandmother when she goes in for surgery you're gonna wish you had seen you."
No, I wouldn't have. 'Cuz then my last memory of her would have been happy. She was getting better, at home, and happy. If something happened to her, that's what I would've wanted to remember, not this.
We got the hospital and we waited in the lobby for my dad to park the car, and I started crying and shaking. Then we started up into the patient wings and I was freaking out. I'm passing all these people with tears running down my face and I just wanted to die. When we got to the room, I couldn't go in. For a minute my family didn't notice I hadn't gone in the room, and my Dad came out and asked why I was crying. Eventually he got me into the room, my grandma wasn't in yet, and I just started crying again. And my mom's like "Stop crying, you have to be strong for Grandma. If she sees you crying, she'll cry" and all I could say is "That's why I didn't wanna come here."
Luckily, my dad got me started talking about police and I calmed down. Eventually, my grandma came back and she was a mess. It was really hard for me not to start crying again, especially when she started showing my mom the incision from her last surgery.
I did eventually manage to show her the pictures from prom (finally). She liked them a lot. She was looking at them and she looks at my mom and says "They really like eachother, don't they?" and later when she handed the pictures back to me, she said "They really love eachother."