[rp][w/ Elena] finding out about Josef
Damon is with Elena. They're in a lounge in the Tower, and he has likely only come over to troll her like he do while she is busy with getting ready for college. He is leaning back in the chair by the fireplace, drinking something alcoholic and searching through the journal for anything important
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Her mouth parts open in shock and then she closes it, shaking her head almost imperceptibly. There are many things she could say but there's also so many thoughts swirling around her head. Josef was working with Damon to bring down a potential threat, and now he's dead.
She's immediately on alert for that reason alone.
It's terrible. It's terrible and she feels for this person that she barely knew, understanding how difficult it is for Damon to care for people at all, much less work with them as allies. It's a sign of trust, and Damon doesn't trust people. Then again, Elena also knows what Damon is capable of when he's hurt, and the warning signs go off in her head.
"Damon, I'm--"
And it's a good thing he cuts her off by telling her to get out of the way.
Damon wouldn't want an I'm sorry, but she is. She's so sorry that Josef is dead and it is instinct in her to reach out. Her compassion and her sense of self do not allow for anything else, even if with him it's always been difficult.
She doesn't get out of the way. At least, not to simply let him walk past.
"I'm going with you," she says instead, and she moves as if following since there's no way she's leaving him alone.
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It was Elena and Josef with some vague trust of Jeremy. There are other people he likes here, that he has regular contact with that he enjoys, but there is no trust. He doesn't hand it out, because it is used against you and the only person he ever felt he could trust for years was himself.
It's a wonder-- it's because of her that he ever started trusting other people at all, and he trusts her and she is all that is left and he has to try to save her from this Society that is so much bigger than him, than them, than this city.
And beyond all that, Josef was his friend, his friend. They never put it into words, but they trusted each other with things that other people wouldn't.
It is a very good thing that she does not get that sentence out, because it would only serve to annoy him. It would not make it better, it would not help. He doesn't want it. He wants to go there, to deal with whatever it is that killed the friend that he had, and then drown himself in alcohol and sex and blood.
All hungers the vampire has.
Damon reaches out to grab her by the arm and keep her back in the room. "No, you are not," he hisses, barely any space between them. "What do you think killed him? They run in and erase any trace of the people that they kill, Elena. It is not safe especially not for you. If they knew you existed, you would be dead. You're staying."
He insists.
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As horrible and painful as it is, when someone you care about has been lost to you, it's supposed to hurt. It's a part of them that needs to remain if they're supposed to be human at all. He once said to her I don't get hurt and whether he likes it or not, Elena knows him so much better than that.
She can tell how much he is hurting now, and is also aware of just how unhealthy his coping mechanisms are.
How dangerous they can be.
Elena presses her lips together, lifting her face to meet his gaze despite the sound of his voice, despite the lack of space between them. She doesn't know what the journal entry said. He's leaving his journal in the Tower as it is, but she thought it would be better to ask him--precisely because trust isn't something anyone magically hands over. They've had a talk about it before. More than once.
"It's not safe for you either, Damon. You're going to go get yourself killed and I am not staying here while you--"
Do whatever it is that he plans on doing. Elena has experienced firsthand what Damon is capable of when he's hurt. She has been told enough about these people to know what they do, know what they are--they are as strong and fast as vampires. There are werewolves, and there's no telling if a werewolf bite from this world can kill him the way it could back home.
There are so many angles he isn't thinking of that she needs to think of in his stead. She jerks in an attempt to break free from the hold he has of her arm.
This is Elena Gilbert, Damon. She doesn't really do what people tell her to.
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It hurts more than he can put to words, more than he ever would put to words, Rift change be fucking damned. It hurts, and it sucks, and Damon wants to drown it out until it stops. The best way that he knows to do that is to give into what the vampire wants, to strike out at others, to break necks or to do things that require the opposite of caring, the opposite of being human.
If he is hurting, his response is to make someone else hurt. It's almost like an impulse. He does it without thought, which does not excuse the many, many things that he has done while he was hurt, out of hurt, but it his reaction and she knows him well. She has been on the other side of what he does when he is hurt. Elena has seen the results, held the results in her hands when he was hurt and broke her brother's neck in front of her.
It's no wonder at all that she worries about what he will do. It's no wonder-- except it ALWAYS is that she worries about him. It always takes him by surprise when he hears it, tilting his head to that side in that momentary confusion that wipes away from his expression before it ever has a chance to register.
"Don't be stupid. I am not wanted by the Society as something to be destroyed. What would you do if you came with? Other than die, other than put yourself at risk to die," he says, and he is already dead, and he just had one friend die. He is not going to let her be anywhere that is dangerous, he is not going to let these people take the only other person that he completely trusts.
The only, only person that he loves.
He is not going to lose her too, not tonight, and the chances of losing her if she goes with him are too high to allow.
This is something that he has only done to her one other time. No, because that time, he used it to erase her memories and this time it is different. It is different, because he's taking her choice away. He tried to do it to her before he knew her, but Stefan gave her a necklace filled with vervain which stopped it.
Elena lost that necklace when the Tower 'appeared' to collapse, and Damon has found it, but he hasn't had the opportunity to give it back to her yet. He pulls her in by the arm again, grabbing her by the shoulder so he can look into her eyes.
And he has plenty of inkling of how angry she'll be with him for this, but nothing has and nothing ever will keep him from protecting her at any, any cost.
"You are not going to leave this Tower," Damon says firmly, he compels her, and she has to obey. With that, he pulls back from her, jaw locked as he looks away, turns, and leaves. He's out of the Tower before she can react, relying on that vampire speed to make up for the time that he has lost to get him to the apartment.
To get him there in time to trail the killers so they can get what's coming to them for daring to touch someone Damon actually gave a damn about.
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