Small, Medium, and Large!
You know those Starbucks coffee houses, those fucking places with the $5 dollar cups of coffee, you know the place don't lie. What really pisses me off is the fact that they re-named the sizes of there cups. Like you know who the original progression for the sizes of beverages was, Small, Medium, and Large!. These fuckers decided to call it, Tall, Grande, and Venti. Give me a fucking break. Like calling small a tall makes me feel better that I'm getting this tiny little urine sample sized cup of coffee swill. And grande what the fuck is with grande!? Where the fuck am I? Mexico? A medium sized beverage is not grande in any way shape or form. Have you ever heard of a grande sized shirt? NO. Grande sized shirts are an extra extra large for the fat bastards. So in that respect a medium sized cup of coffee is not grande. If there was it would be the size of one of those crazy ass cups you'd find at those 7/11 stores. And venti... what fucking language is that?! What is it? Latin? When the fuck did we start using dead languages to describe the size of coffee cups!? How the fuck am I supposed to know that venti means large. Just call it large, like calling something by a diffrent name makes it seem so much more sophisticated. I hope a "venti" sized truck run overs your "grande" sized head and smashes that "tall" brain of yours into "taller" peices.