Willow Rosenberg (Buffy The Vampire Slayer)
Title: Bent But Not Broken
Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Character: Willow Rosenberg
Author: calliopes_pen
E-Mail: julia_hoffman2003 at yahoo dot com
Spoilers: There are spoilers for pretty much the entire series run of BtVS.
Notes: Thanks to seandc for beta reading.
"I'm not okay. I knew those guys. I go to that room every day. And when I walked in there, it...it wasn't our world anymore. They made it theirs. And they had fun. What are we gonna do?"
--Willow to Buffy, after finding the slaughtered bodies of some friends, in Prophecy Girl.
Introduction
This essay will discuss Willow Rosenberg, one of the very powerful women that frequented Buffy the Vampire Slayer. The series showed the evolution of a very complex and fascinating character through the seven years of the show’s history. I will describe both the events that shaped Willow’s life, and her reactions. How they shaped her and nearly broke her. And, as the title suggests, she was forced to bend lest she break under the horrors that she saw and endured daily.
The History of Willow: Prior to Buffy’s Arrival
Willow Danielle Rosenberg is the daughter of Sheila and Ira Rosenberg. Prior to the start of the series, Willow Rosenberg was simply considered to just be a computer geek who happened to also be a good person. Someone who was constantly taunted and harassed about everything from her fashion choices (that Sears outfit from the first episode) to the people she hung out with. Everything concerning her appearance was pretty much scoffed at.
As we learn in the first episode, Willow briefly dated Xander Harris-until he stole her Barbie doll. Hey, they were 5! A cute and adorable memory--exactly the type of person that Willow was prior to Welcome to the Hellmouth. She carried a torch for Xander from them, until her teenage years. Sadly, despite the crush that was obvious to everyone, Xander never even thought of her as anything other than his best friend. Who just happened to be a girl. That obliviousness lasted until the middle of season 3.
And as for dating boys other than Xander? She wasn’t the best at that. The following is how she, in her own words, would react whenever she made the attempt to initiate a conversation.
"Well, when I'm with a boy I like, it's hard for me to say anything cool, or, or witty, or at all. I can usually make a few vowel sounds, and then I have to go away."
--Welcome to the Hellmouth
The History of Willow: Post-Buffy’s Arrival
As the series begins, Willow is constantly being mocked by Cordelia and her Cordettes. She suffers these indignations mostly in silence, seeking refuge in computer work and science. However, it is when Buffy befriends her that her life truly takes a strange turn.
Vampires, demons, and everything that goes bump in the night are proven to be real. In fact, it is shortly after Buffy convinces Willow to “seize the moment, because tomorrow you might be dead” that she meets her first vampire--and nearly becomes one of the first of many vampire casualties in town at this point. Sadly, while both Willow and Xander are rescued from becoming late night snacks, Jessie is not so fortunate. He is the first person that Willow loses to vampirism--not just a snack, as he recently has been turned by Darla. When he is later staked by Xander during a vampire attack at The Bronze, one must realize that she has now lost one of her best friends twice.
This is not the last time that strangeness befalls her friends and loved ones. The season 1 finale (Prophecy Girl) had Willow stumble across the bodies of the AV club. You can find the quote at the beginning of this essay. If Jessie’s death didn’t cause her to lose her faith that goodness will always prevail, then this is the moment it really sunk in.
The next pivotal moment for Willow occurs in season 2’s Halloween. Ethan Rayne causes everyone to become their costumes. Everyone that is, except for Willow. She had dressed as a person other than what she was--possibly a hooker, it is difficult to tell. The first time she sees herself in a mirror, she is terrified of how she looks and puts on a sheet. She would rather be completely covered than have anyone see her as anything other than sweet, reliable Willow. She even says when asked about it by Buffy, “Oh, I don’t get wild. Wild on me equals spaz.”
It is more than likely the fact that she wore two costumes which prevented her from thinking she was actually a ghost--unlike Buffy who thought she was a 17th century lady, and Xander who believed himself to be a soldier. To her horror, the only thing that did not make the transition when she ended up a ghost was her sheet. The situation forced her to overcome quite a bit of modesty, and it forced her to take charge of the situation. She was practically the only lucid person in the group at this point in time.
When the spell is finally broken, she finds herself on the front steps of the last house she had trick-or-treated at. Rather than hiding under the sheet and running home, she tosses the covering aside. And then, in a wonderful moment for Willow’s character, she strides confidently down the street. For that one night, she wasn’t self-conscious. Unbeknownst to her, this is also the second time Oz sees her as he sits in his van. Just like before, he wonders “Who is that girl?” They finally have a proper meeting in What’s My Line, Part One, but it is more than likely this moment of complete confidence that really drew his eye to her.
Once she begins dating Oz, Willow is put to another test. In Phases it is revealed that Oz became a werewolf after his little nephew bit him. Despite nearly being killed after Oz turned into a wolf and chased her through the woods, Willow accepted him. She refused to leave him because just because of his little wolf problem. The reason behind that decision is classic Willow.
"Well, I like you. You're nice, and you're funny, and you don't smoke. Yeah, okay, werewolf, but that's not all the time. I mean, three days out of the month I'm not much fun to be around either."
Two episodes later there was the episode Passion. Willow’s favorite teacher (Jenny Calendar) was hunted through the school, and killed by Angelus. As a sick gift, the vampire left the corpse in Giles’ bed. Willow was devastated, and at the end of the episode Principal Snyder asked her if she would teach the late teacher’s computer science classes until a replacement could be found. She accepted, and continued to do so until at least, the season two finale. This loss was quite possibly one of the worst for her since she found the bodies of the AV club.
Despite the loss of Miss Calendar, and the fact she was still a bit shy at this point in her life, Willow was actually a great teacher who joked with her class.
At the end of season 2, Willow finally attempts her first spell. I say attempts because in Becoming Part 1 she was interrupted by Drusilla attacking the library and causing a bookshelf to fall on her. During her recovery in the hospital in Becoming Part 2, (after awakening from a coma) she, along with Cordelia and Oz, helped to complete the spell to restore Angel’s soul.
Midway through the spell, she channeled a Romanian spirit--the spirit (who may have been either Jenny, or someone from the tribe that cursed Angelus with a soul--reports vary) finished the spell through Willow. After that first taste of power, Willow would go on to try to learn more and more about magic.
Not Just Levitating A Pencil
Throughout season 3, Willow mostly dabbled in magic. Most spells she attempted would backfire during this time in her life. When the parents of Sunnydale were controlled by a demon in Gingerbread, Willow was nearly burned at the stake. After that, she learned to keep her magic to herself, and probably just discuss it with close friends.
The fear that her magic would always go haywire and make her useless was addressed in season 4’s Fear, Itself. A demon enhanced everyone’s fears, and a fear of being useless and left alone just happened to be Willow’s. Sadly, this fear didn’t just go away, and grew a bit as the seasons went on.
At the best of times at this point, she was able to make pencils float and spin. She didn’t manage to cause anything heavier to float or otherwise move until she meets Tara Maclay in Hush.
When Oz cheated on her and left her for Veruca in Wild At Heart, Willow was truly enraged for the first time. She began a spell to wreck vengeance on both Veruca and Oz, but she couldn’t finish it. Despite what he had done, she knew that she could never hurt Oz. When Veruca arrived and attempted to kill Willow, Oz rescued her. The fact that Oz was unable to control the wolf (killing Veruca in a werewolf fight in the process) in him led to his leaving Sunnydale. In Something Blue, still upset over Oz leaving her, she casts a “will be done” spell. The spell backfires, and the resulting chaos (including Spike wanting to marry Buffy) garners the attention of D’Hoffryn, a vengeance demon. He offers her the job as a vengeance demon, and she refuses. She then casts another spell break the “will be done” spell.
By the time Oz returns to win Willow back in New Moon Rising, however, Willow has moved on. She has fallen for Tara Maclay. At the end of the episode, Willow goes to tell Tara just that.
Cut to Tara in her darkened dorm room, looking out the window. There's a knock on the door. She gets up to answer it. It's Willow, holding a candle.)
Willow: No candles? Well, I brought one. It's extra flamey.
(Tara doesn't say anything. Willow steps forward and gives her the candle, closes the door behind herself.)
Willow: Tara, I have to tell you...
Tara: No, I-I understand. You have to be with the person you l-love.
Willow: (smiles) I am.
(Tara looks amazed.)
Tara: You mean...
Willow: I mean. (pause) Okay?
Tara: Oh, yes.
Willow: I feel horrible about everything I put you through. A-and I'm gonna make it up to you. Starting right now.
Tara: (starts to smile) Right now?
(Willow smiles and nods. Tara blows out the candle.)
--Special thanks go to this site for the entire quote from that scene.
As time passes, Willow grows ever stronger with the magic, and isn’t reluctant to delve into the dark arts. Tara tried to keep her in check, and explain that magic shouldn’t be used as a toy.
However, in Tough Love Glory takes away Tara’s mind, leaving her completely insane. Willow goes after Glory to get revenge.
Glory: Did anybody order an apocalypse?
Willow: *hovering a few feet above the ground* Kali, Hera, Kronos, Tonic...Air like nectar, thick as onyx...Cassiel by your second star...
Glory: Ohh! It's the lover. That's so cute.
Willow: Hold mine victim as in tar.
*air gets wavy and holds Glory, who can’t move. *
Willow: I ... owe ... you ... pain!
*Willow shoots lightning at her*
She actually holds her own for a bit until Glory comes close to killing her. The above scene, by the way, is more than likely our first peek at Dark Willow.
Thankfully, in The Gift, Willow is finally able to reverse the magic that stole Tara’s mind. The ecstasy of getting Tara back is undermined by the tragic sacrifice of Buffy. From there, Willow traveled to the Hyperion and waited for Angel to return from Pylea at the end of No Place Like Plrtz Grlb. As the scene faded to black, it was obvious she was about to tell Angel everything that had happened.
And at the start of season 6, Willow just can’t take the fact that Buffy is dead. She plans to resurrect her, no matter the price...
When Good Witches Go Bad...And Then Good Again
As season 6 began, Willow, Xander, Tara, and Anya made a pact to raise Buffy from the dead. In preparation for the act, Willow gathered the ingredients--one of which is the heart of a deer.
The scene where she kills the deer shows just how much Willow has changed since the series began. The old Willow would never have been able to harm an animal. She has lost part of herself. During the resurrection itself, Willow (channeling a lot of mystical energy) endures numerous tests--including strange cuts appearing on her arms, as well as other gruesome events. (Vomiting up a snake is a test?! She should have picked a different one or simply passed.)
In contrast to her quirky season 3 self, Willow actually leads the Scoobies telepathically as they hunt down vampires in the graveyard.
Willow actually threatens Giles (in Flooded) when he tries to tell her that the magics she used were too dangerous.
Giles: "The magics you channelled are ferocious and primal. You are lucky to be alive, you rank, arrogant amateur."
Willow: "You're right...I'm very powerful. And maybe it's not such a good idea for you to piss me off."
While she immediately apologizes, it is obvious that Willow has too much power at her disposal. She only gets darker as the season progresses. This led to a storyline that was hated by many fans of the show: The Magic Addiction storyline.
First, Tara and Willow broke up in Tabula Rasa. While devastated due to that, she managed to change Amy back to her human form from that of a rat. And then, there was Rack-basically her dealer for black magic. Willow became addicted to it beginning in Wrecked--which is basically just Willow coming down from a high.
The magic addiction continued off and on until Willow decided to quit magic cold turkey. She was tempted to use it to free everyone in Older And Far Away, but resisted.
Sadly, after Willow finally got herself together and got back together with Tara, events conspired to ruin everything. Warren shot Tara, leading Willow to go insane with grief.
From there, she absorbed the words in a book of dark magic, (changing her hair to black) and went on to torture and finally skin Warren alive. (Later, you learn that D’Hoffryn was very impressed.) Once he was dead, she went after Andrew, Jonathan, and anyone that stood in her way. She wanted to destroy the world just to end her pain.
And then, finally, Xander managed to get through to her. She tried to kill him with her magic, but couldn’t do it. Finally, she falls into his arms, and cries as she begins the grieving process. And, as she sobbed her heart out, her hair also changed back to red.
In between seasons 6 and 7, Willow was sent to England (with Giles) so that a coven could help her regain control of herself. She returned to Sunnydale in Same Time, Same Place only to find that her powers had caused her to be invisible to her friends, and they to her. Basically, she was now able to cast spells just by thinking them.
She also managed to return to L.A. to re-soul Angelus during all the chaos. How they managed without her at this point in Sunnydale is unclear. By all appearances, during Orpheus the young witch was more in control than she had been in a long time. She didn’t go evil, although she did compare notes with Wesley on her brief foray into the dark side. Personally, I think Willow won that one.
Once Angel was re-souled, and things were as normal as it would ever get for Angel Investigations, she took Faith and returned to Sunnydale.
Through setbacks and trials and terrors from The First Evil, Willow managed to stay strong. She did not fall back into evil. She managed to keep from losing control.
And finally, in Chosen, she was able to make every single Potential Slayer an actual Slayer. And in the process, she briefly became a goddess. Her hair shone bright white during that moment, showing that she had come full circle.
Relationships
Ah, relationships. If anyone can be considered one of the most unlucky in love, it would have to be Willow Rosenberg. The other two competing in that area include Xander and Buffy.
As mentioned earlier in this essay, Xander was Willow’s first crush. In season 1 she refused to even attempt to speak up about her feelings, giving the following as an excuse.
“No, no, no, no. No speaking up. That way leads to madness...and sweaty palms.”
--from Angel. The episode, not the series.
In When She Was Bad one learned that the two had grown close over the summer. They come close to a kiss but are interrupted by a vampire, whom Buffy quickly dusts. The moment is over, and Xander forgets all about it. In Bewitched, Bothered, And Bewildered, Xander tries to cast a love spell on Cordelia, but most of the town falls for him. Willow is affected, and when he doesn’t return her feelings, she hunts him down with an axe until the spell is broken.
Willow’s crush basically remained unrequited (despite that one season 2 moment) until season 3, when Willow and Xander had a brief affair. It quickly ended after their significant others of the time (Oz and Cordelia) found out about it.
Another attempt at romance failed miserably during season 1, when the boy Willow had feelings for turned out to be a demon (I, Robot...You, Jane) named Moloch the Corruptor. Along with Willow, Xander and Buffy defeated him.
Oz was next for the redhead. While he was a werewolf, Willow still dated him. She thought they would be together forever--until she was a blue-haired old woman, at the very least. This relationship lasted from the middle of season 2 until the middle of season 4. Sadly, their relationship ended messily when Oz cheated on Willow with a fellow band singer named Veruca. Also a werewolf, I should note.
And then, there was Tara. This relationship was one of the healthiest in the Buffyverse. Willow and Tara were together from mid-season 4 until Tabula Rasa in season 6. They broke up due to Willow’s overuse of magic, but reconciled at the beginning of Seeing Red. In a horrific quirk of fate, mere moments after their reconciliation, a stray bullet from Warren’s gun hit and killed Tara. Insane with grief, Willow then tried to seek revenge on the one who killed Tara--until she was stopped by Xander. Here is part of the speech he used to stop her.
Xander: First day of kindergarten. You cried because you broke the yellow crayon, and you were too afraid to tell anyone. You've come pretty far, ending the world, not a terrific notion. But the thing is? Yeah. I love you. I loved crayon-breaky Willow and I love...scary veiny Willow. So if I'm going out, it's here. If you wanna kill the world? Well, then start with me. I've earned that.
The last relationship for Willow came during season 7. Willow met and started to date a Potential Slayer by the name of Kennedy. As a brief side note, I just want to say that Kennedy may very well be the most hated character in all of the Buffyverse.
On the mortal enemies’ side of the fence, there may only be a couple who would fit that category. The first? Warren. The man who had what seemed to be a pathological hatred of women. With two bullets he killed Tara, and wounded Buffy. And due to this, Willow lost the woman that meant the world to her. After going evil, Willow hunted him down and flayed him alive. She tortured him before she killed him.
While she definitely regretted the violence, part of her still hated the man. In one season 7 episode, (The Killer In Me) due to a spell cast by Amy, he came back to haunt her. After realizing she wasn’t responsible for Tara’s death, (And forcing herself to overcome the idea she was Warren--long story.) Willow was finally beginning to work through the issues she had.
My Obsession With Willow: Or, What Do You See In Her?!
The first time I ever saw Willow Rosenberg was when I decided to watch my first episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. I had heard that it was an interesting show (understatement!) and wanted to give it a shot. The episode in question was a first run of season 3’s Dead Man’s Party, and I simply adored this quirky, nerdish, computer obsessed girl that tried to stand up to Buffy Summers. A girl who was struggling to learn about magic, and yet, at the same time, was utterly terrified that she would fail a class.
Oh, and I mustn’t forget the frog fear. That strange phobia was revealed in What’s My Line, Part One when she screamed in her sleep “don’t warn the tadpoles!” If frogs ever actually rained from the sky, she wouldn’t be much help--at least, not in season 2 or 3. It was never mentioned again after Killed By Death, so maybe someone finally helped get her over it.
Willow also had a big heart--she proved how much she loved her friends by staying in Sunnydale at the end of season 3. She could have gone to practically any school in the country, and even was eligible for a few in Europe if she had chosen to attend them. Instead, she chose to stay and help fight the evil in Sunnydale.
"Actually, this isn't about you. Although I'm fond, don't get me wrong, of you. The other night, you know, being captured and all, facing off with Faith. Things just, kind of, got clear. I mean, you've been fighting evil here for three years, and I've helped some, and now we're supposed to decide what we want to do with our lives. And I just realized that that's what I want to do. Fight evil, help people. I mean, I think it's worth doing. And I don't think you do it because you have to. It's a good fight, Buffy, and I want in."
--Willow, in Choices.
Below you see just how hard she tried to make Buffy stay home, and not run away for the second time. That was the type of person that Willow Rosenberg was. Before the magic addictions, before the drama, and the loss of friends and loved ones to various misfortunes. This was back when she was still learning how to float a pencil, by the way.
“No! I don't just mean that. I mean, my life! You know? I, um...I'm having all sorts of... I'm dating, I'm having serious dating with a *werewolf*, a-and I'm studying witchcraft and killing vampires, and I didn't have anyone (starts sobbing) to talk to about all this scary life stuff. And you were my best friend.”
-Willow, having a mini-breakdown as she tries to keep Buffy from running away again, in Dead Man’s Party.
Starting in season 3, (at least for me) you could watch the young awkward redhead blossom into a strong, loving woman, with a penchant for magic. While there were hardships and traumas, she overcame them. Sadly, she couldn’t always fix things, but she did her best.
And after everything she went through, and everything she did in the course of the series, she was still at heart a good person. She was more cautious with her magic, but after nearly destroying the world that’s to be expected.
What Keeps One Interested In Willow?
The complex path which the character walked made for an interesting experience. She was a good person who--while she had good intentions--nearly lost everything in an attempt to stay happy. She couldn’t fix everything, no matter how much magic she had. She was flawed, and that makes for an interesting person.
Her strengths were the fact that she was good with magic. Prior to her introduction to magic, she was also an expert hacker/computer whiz who was even approached by a reputable computer company about a possible future with them. (What’s My Line, Part One-also when she finally met Oz.) However, that was also a weakness as she became so powerful that she went insane when someone close to her (Tara) died.
She was a good friend that everyone could rely on. And while she didn’t always enjoy being the responsible one, she accepted the role with dignity. She had her good times and her bad times, but she still kept going. She may have bent, and come within inches of completely shattering, but her soul still did not break under the weight of her trials and tribulations.
Another major weakness for her was the obsession with controlling everything. Due to this, she stole a memory of an argument from Tara. She wanted to erase something, rather than discuss it, and she did to Tara what Glory had once done. Took something from her mind. Because of this, the two broke up. And Willow did whatever she had to if it meant getting Tara to come back to her.
She even tried to give up magic, but it didn’t last. As I mentioned earlier in the history section, she learned that she couldn’t simply give up magic. But after everything, she would not allow it to control her any longer. She studied as much as she could to get back to nature, and get away from the evil.
The fact that her story never ended makes the character fascinating to me. It is more than likely that which causes fanfic to continue to be written. I know it is the depth and complexity of her character that makes me write for her.
Both here, and in various fanfics and RPG’s, such as btvsats_20.
And so, in the end Willow Rosenberg has come full circle. In one year, she traveled from being the Big Bad (nearly destroying the world in season 6), to what could only be considered a few moments as a goddess incarnate. She learned from her experiences with black magic, and tried to change.
What does the future hold in store for Miss Rosenberg? Only Joss Whedon (and the writers of fanfic, of course) knows for sure.
One thing is certain: Her journey is not yet complete.
Links
Fanlistings
Magical. Includes quotes from Willow from every season.
Suddenly Painless. A fanlisting for Willow/Oz fans.
Eternal Witch: The Unofficial Willow Fanlisting.
Love You: The Willow And Xander Fanlisting.
Willow Related Groups
willowficathon
willowoz
world_of_willow
willotaraicons
willowxander
alyson_daily
willow_fans
Willfic.
BetterBuffyFics. You can find many more Willow related fanfics through this group.
Non-fiction: The Discussion of Willow In Other Places
with_character. Go through the Memeories section for this group, and you can find character studies for the different seasons of Willow.
The Wikipedia entry for Willow Rosenberg.
Willow’s Problem: It’s Not About Power. This is a fascinating essay about the magic addiction story arc, and what Willow’s actual psychological problems more than likely were. Dozens of other interesting essays can be found at Near Her Always.
Fan fiction That’s Worth A Look
Deus Otiosis. Set after season 7’s Empty Places, Willow thinks about the choices she’s made that led her to this point. Rated PG-13; written by Annakovsky.
A Girl With Kaleidoscope Eyes. Willow is haunted after Tara’s death. Disturbing, creepy, and very well-written. Rated PG-13; written by Kyra Cullinan.
Warmth. Written by thete1; this is set after season 6. Willow and Xander finally talk about things-very intense, and a wonderful story. Rated R. There are mentions of Willow/Tara, Willow/Oz, and a bit of Willow/Xander is thrown in there for good measure.
Snapshots: Willow. Written by Northlight. As the title suggests, you can read about snapshots of Willow’s life; from a very young age, until her life with Tara. Beautifully written. Rated PG-13.
Disparity, written by velvetandlace. Set in between the end of season 6, and the beginning of season 7, this story takes a good hard look at what Willow became, and how she tried to fix it. A very moving story that shows just how afraid she was to go home and face everyone. Rated PG-13.
What The Carpenter Saw, written by raedbard. This is a wonderful Willow/Xander friendship story, set in the middle of Empty Places. Xander sees a lot--especially just how much Willow has changed over the years. Perfectly captures how each keeps the other sane. I highly recommend reading it. Rated PG-13
And The First Shall Be Last, written by invisionary. Post-Chosen, Willow visits Xander and remembers how things used to be. Not rated, but would probably gain a PG rating.
Valley of Ashes, by hannasus. Set after season 5; Willow goes to break the news of Buffy’s death to Angel. Excellent showing of how Willow is just an observer that doesn’t know what has been going on with Angel and his team.
Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Character: Willow Rosenberg
Author: calliopes_pen
E-Mail: julia_hoffman2003 at yahoo dot com
Spoilers: There are spoilers for pretty much the entire series run of BtVS.
Notes: Thanks to seandc for beta reading.
"I'm not okay. I knew those guys. I go to that room every day. And when I walked in there, it...it wasn't our world anymore. They made it theirs. And they had fun. What are we gonna do?"
--Willow to Buffy, after finding the slaughtered bodies of some friends, in Prophecy Girl.
Introduction
This essay will discuss Willow Rosenberg, one of the very powerful women that frequented Buffy the Vampire Slayer. The series showed the evolution of a very complex and fascinating character through the seven years of the show’s history. I will describe both the events that shaped Willow’s life, and her reactions. How they shaped her and nearly broke her. And, as the title suggests, she was forced to bend lest she break under the horrors that she saw and endured daily.
The History of Willow: Prior to Buffy’s Arrival
Willow Danielle Rosenberg is the daughter of Sheila and Ira Rosenberg. Prior to the start of the series, Willow Rosenberg was simply considered to just be a computer geek who happened to also be a good person. Someone who was constantly taunted and harassed about everything from her fashion choices (that Sears outfit from the first episode) to the people she hung out with. Everything concerning her appearance was pretty much scoffed at.
As we learn in the first episode, Willow briefly dated Xander Harris-until he stole her Barbie doll. Hey, they were 5! A cute and adorable memory--exactly the type of person that Willow was prior to Welcome to the Hellmouth. She carried a torch for Xander from them, until her teenage years. Sadly, despite the crush that was obvious to everyone, Xander never even thought of her as anything other than his best friend. Who just happened to be a girl. That obliviousness lasted until the middle of season 3.
And as for dating boys other than Xander? She wasn’t the best at that. The following is how she, in her own words, would react whenever she made the attempt to initiate a conversation.
"Well, when I'm with a boy I like, it's hard for me to say anything cool, or, or witty, or at all. I can usually make a few vowel sounds, and then I have to go away."
--Welcome to the Hellmouth
The History of Willow: Post-Buffy’s Arrival
As the series begins, Willow is constantly being mocked by Cordelia and her Cordettes. She suffers these indignations mostly in silence, seeking refuge in computer work and science. However, it is when Buffy befriends her that her life truly takes a strange turn.
Vampires, demons, and everything that goes bump in the night are proven to be real. In fact, it is shortly after Buffy convinces Willow to “seize the moment, because tomorrow you might be dead” that she meets her first vampire--and nearly becomes one of the first of many vampire casualties in town at this point. Sadly, while both Willow and Xander are rescued from becoming late night snacks, Jessie is not so fortunate. He is the first person that Willow loses to vampirism--not just a snack, as he recently has been turned by Darla. When he is later staked by Xander during a vampire attack at The Bronze, one must realize that she has now lost one of her best friends twice.
This is not the last time that strangeness befalls her friends and loved ones. The season 1 finale (Prophecy Girl) had Willow stumble across the bodies of the AV club. You can find the quote at the beginning of this essay. If Jessie’s death didn’t cause her to lose her faith that goodness will always prevail, then this is the moment it really sunk in.
The next pivotal moment for Willow occurs in season 2’s Halloween. Ethan Rayne causes everyone to become their costumes. Everyone that is, except for Willow. She had dressed as a person other than what she was--possibly a hooker, it is difficult to tell. The first time she sees herself in a mirror, she is terrified of how she looks and puts on a sheet. She would rather be completely covered than have anyone see her as anything other than sweet, reliable Willow. She even says when asked about it by Buffy, “Oh, I don’t get wild. Wild on me equals spaz.”
It is more than likely the fact that she wore two costumes which prevented her from thinking she was actually a ghost--unlike Buffy who thought she was a 17th century lady, and Xander who believed himself to be a soldier. To her horror, the only thing that did not make the transition when she ended up a ghost was her sheet. The situation forced her to overcome quite a bit of modesty, and it forced her to take charge of the situation. She was practically the only lucid person in the group at this point in time.
When the spell is finally broken, she finds herself on the front steps of the last house she had trick-or-treated at. Rather than hiding under the sheet and running home, she tosses the covering aside. And then, in a wonderful moment for Willow’s character, she strides confidently down the street. For that one night, she wasn’t self-conscious. Unbeknownst to her, this is also the second time Oz sees her as he sits in his van. Just like before, he wonders “Who is that girl?” They finally have a proper meeting in What’s My Line, Part One, but it is more than likely this moment of complete confidence that really drew his eye to her.
Once she begins dating Oz, Willow is put to another test. In Phases it is revealed that Oz became a werewolf after his little nephew bit him. Despite nearly being killed after Oz turned into a wolf and chased her through the woods, Willow accepted him. She refused to leave him because just because of his little wolf problem. The reason behind that decision is classic Willow.
"Well, I like you. You're nice, and you're funny, and you don't smoke. Yeah, okay, werewolf, but that's not all the time. I mean, three days out of the month I'm not much fun to be around either."
Two episodes later there was the episode Passion. Willow’s favorite teacher (Jenny Calendar) was hunted through the school, and killed by Angelus. As a sick gift, the vampire left the corpse in Giles’ bed. Willow was devastated, and at the end of the episode Principal Snyder asked her if she would teach the late teacher’s computer science classes until a replacement could be found. She accepted, and continued to do so until at least, the season two finale. This loss was quite possibly one of the worst for her since she found the bodies of the AV club.
Despite the loss of Miss Calendar, and the fact she was still a bit shy at this point in her life, Willow was actually a great teacher who joked with her class.
At the end of season 2, Willow finally attempts her first spell. I say attempts because in Becoming Part 1 she was interrupted by Drusilla attacking the library and causing a bookshelf to fall on her. During her recovery in the hospital in Becoming Part 2, (after awakening from a coma) she, along with Cordelia and Oz, helped to complete the spell to restore Angel’s soul.
Midway through the spell, she channeled a Romanian spirit--the spirit (who may have been either Jenny, or someone from the tribe that cursed Angelus with a soul--reports vary) finished the spell through Willow. After that first taste of power, Willow would go on to try to learn more and more about magic.
Not Just Levitating A Pencil
Throughout season 3, Willow mostly dabbled in magic. Most spells she attempted would backfire during this time in her life. When the parents of Sunnydale were controlled by a demon in Gingerbread, Willow was nearly burned at the stake. After that, she learned to keep her magic to herself, and probably just discuss it with close friends.
The fear that her magic would always go haywire and make her useless was addressed in season 4’s Fear, Itself. A demon enhanced everyone’s fears, and a fear of being useless and left alone just happened to be Willow’s. Sadly, this fear didn’t just go away, and grew a bit as the seasons went on.
At the best of times at this point, she was able to make pencils float and spin. She didn’t manage to cause anything heavier to float or otherwise move until she meets Tara Maclay in Hush.
When Oz cheated on her and left her for Veruca in Wild At Heart, Willow was truly enraged for the first time. She began a spell to wreck vengeance on both Veruca and Oz, but she couldn’t finish it. Despite what he had done, she knew that she could never hurt Oz. When Veruca arrived and attempted to kill Willow, Oz rescued her. The fact that Oz was unable to control the wolf (killing Veruca in a werewolf fight in the process) in him led to his leaving Sunnydale. In Something Blue, still upset over Oz leaving her, she casts a “will be done” spell. The spell backfires, and the resulting chaos (including Spike wanting to marry Buffy) garners the attention of D’Hoffryn, a vengeance demon. He offers her the job as a vengeance demon, and she refuses. She then casts another spell break the “will be done” spell.
By the time Oz returns to win Willow back in New Moon Rising, however, Willow has moved on. She has fallen for Tara Maclay. At the end of the episode, Willow goes to tell Tara just that.
Cut to Tara in her darkened dorm room, looking out the window. There's a knock on the door. She gets up to answer it. It's Willow, holding a candle.)
Willow: No candles? Well, I brought one. It's extra flamey.
(Tara doesn't say anything. Willow steps forward and gives her the candle, closes the door behind herself.)
Willow: Tara, I have to tell you...
Tara: No, I-I understand. You have to be with the person you l-love.
Willow: (smiles) I am.
(Tara looks amazed.)
Tara: You mean...
Willow: I mean. (pause) Okay?
Tara: Oh, yes.
Willow: I feel horrible about everything I put you through. A-and I'm gonna make it up to you. Starting right now.
Tara: (starts to smile) Right now?
(Willow smiles and nods. Tara blows out the candle.)
--Special thanks go to this site for the entire quote from that scene.
As time passes, Willow grows ever stronger with the magic, and isn’t reluctant to delve into the dark arts. Tara tried to keep her in check, and explain that magic shouldn’t be used as a toy.
However, in Tough Love Glory takes away Tara’s mind, leaving her completely insane. Willow goes after Glory to get revenge.
Glory: Did anybody order an apocalypse?
Willow: *hovering a few feet above the ground* Kali, Hera, Kronos, Tonic...Air like nectar, thick as onyx...Cassiel by your second star...
Glory: Ohh! It's the lover. That's so cute.
Willow: Hold mine victim as in tar.
*air gets wavy and holds Glory, who can’t move. *
Willow: I ... owe ... you ... pain!
*Willow shoots lightning at her*
She actually holds her own for a bit until Glory comes close to killing her. The above scene, by the way, is more than likely our first peek at Dark Willow.
Thankfully, in The Gift, Willow is finally able to reverse the magic that stole Tara’s mind. The ecstasy of getting Tara back is undermined by the tragic sacrifice of Buffy. From there, Willow traveled to the Hyperion and waited for Angel to return from Pylea at the end of No Place Like Plrtz Grlb. As the scene faded to black, it was obvious she was about to tell Angel everything that had happened.
And at the start of season 6, Willow just can’t take the fact that Buffy is dead. She plans to resurrect her, no matter the price...
When Good Witches Go Bad...And Then Good Again
As season 6 began, Willow, Xander, Tara, and Anya made a pact to raise Buffy from the dead. In preparation for the act, Willow gathered the ingredients--one of which is the heart of a deer.
The scene where she kills the deer shows just how much Willow has changed since the series began. The old Willow would never have been able to harm an animal. She has lost part of herself. During the resurrection itself, Willow (channeling a lot of mystical energy) endures numerous tests--including strange cuts appearing on her arms, as well as other gruesome events. (Vomiting up a snake is a test?! She should have picked a different one or simply passed.)
In contrast to her quirky season 3 self, Willow actually leads the Scoobies telepathically as they hunt down vampires in the graveyard.
Willow actually threatens Giles (in Flooded) when he tries to tell her that the magics she used were too dangerous.
Giles: "The magics you channelled are ferocious and primal. You are lucky to be alive, you rank, arrogant amateur."
Willow: "You're right...I'm very powerful. And maybe it's not such a good idea for you to piss me off."
While she immediately apologizes, it is obvious that Willow has too much power at her disposal. She only gets darker as the season progresses. This led to a storyline that was hated by many fans of the show: The Magic Addiction storyline.
First, Tara and Willow broke up in Tabula Rasa. While devastated due to that, she managed to change Amy back to her human form from that of a rat. And then, there was Rack-basically her dealer for black magic. Willow became addicted to it beginning in Wrecked--which is basically just Willow coming down from a high.
The magic addiction continued off and on until Willow decided to quit magic cold turkey. She was tempted to use it to free everyone in Older And Far Away, but resisted.
Sadly, after Willow finally got herself together and got back together with Tara, events conspired to ruin everything. Warren shot Tara, leading Willow to go insane with grief.
From there, she absorbed the words in a book of dark magic, (changing her hair to black) and went on to torture and finally skin Warren alive. (Later, you learn that D’Hoffryn was very impressed.) Once he was dead, she went after Andrew, Jonathan, and anyone that stood in her way. She wanted to destroy the world just to end her pain.
And then, finally, Xander managed to get through to her. She tried to kill him with her magic, but couldn’t do it. Finally, she falls into his arms, and cries as she begins the grieving process. And, as she sobbed her heart out, her hair also changed back to red.
In between seasons 6 and 7, Willow was sent to England (with Giles) so that a coven could help her regain control of herself. She returned to Sunnydale in Same Time, Same Place only to find that her powers had caused her to be invisible to her friends, and they to her. Basically, she was now able to cast spells just by thinking them.
She also managed to return to L.A. to re-soul Angelus during all the chaos. How they managed without her at this point in Sunnydale is unclear. By all appearances, during Orpheus the young witch was more in control than she had been in a long time. She didn’t go evil, although she did compare notes with Wesley on her brief foray into the dark side. Personally, I think Willow won that one.
Once Angel was re-souled, and things were as normal as it would ever get for Angel Investigations, she took Faith and returned to Sunnydale.
Through setbacks and trials and terrors from The First Evil, Willow managed to stay strong. She did not fall back into evil. She managed to keep from losing control.
And finally, in Chosen, she was able to make every single Potential Slayer an actual Slayer. And in the process, she briefly became a goddess. Her hair shone bright white during that moment, showing that she had come full circle.
Relationships
Ah, relationships. If anyone can be considered one of the most unlucky in love, it would have to be Willow Rosenberg. The other two competing in that area include Xander and Buffy.
As mentioned earlier in this essay, Xander was Willow’s first crush. In season 1 she refused to even attempt to speak up about her feelings, giving the following as an excuse.
“No, no, no, no. No speaking up. That way leads to madness...and sweaty palms.”
--from Angel. The episode, not the series.
In When She Was Bad one learned that the two had grown close over the summer. They come close to a kiss but are interrupted by a vampire, whom Buffy quickly dusts. The moment is over, and Xander forgets all about it. In Bewitched, Bothered, And Bewildered, Xander tries to cast a love spell on Cordelia, but most of the town falls for him. Willow is affected, and when he doesn’t return her feelings, she hunts him down with an axe until the spell is broken.
Willow’s crush basically remained unrequited (despite that one season 2 moment) until season 3, when Willow and Xander had a brief affair. It quickly ended after their significant others of the time (Oz and Cordelia) found out about it.
Another attempt at romance failed miserably during season 1, when the boy Willow had feelings for turned out to be a demon (I, Robot...You, Jane) named Moloch the Corruptor. Along with Willow, Xander and Buffy defeated him.
Oz was next for the redhead. While he was a werewolf, Willow still dated him. She thought they would be together forever--until she was a blue-haired old woman, at the very least. This relationship lasted from the middle of season 2 until the middle of season 4. Sadly, their relationship ended messily when Oz cheated on Willow with a fellow band singer named Veruca. Also a werewolf, I should note.
And then, there was Tara. This relationship was one of the healthiest in the Buffyverse. Willow and Tara were together from mid-season 4 until Tabula Rasa in season 6. They broke up due to Willow’s overuse of magic, but reconciled at the beginning of Seeing Red. In a horrific quirk of fate, mere moments after their reconciliation, a stray bullet from Warren’s gun hit and killed Tara. Insane with grief, Willow then tried to seek revenge on the one who killed Tara--until she was stopped by Xander. Here is part of the speech he used to stop her.
Xander: First day of kindergarten. You cried because you broke the yellow crayon, and you were too afraid to tell anyone. You've come pretty far, ending the world, not a terrific notion. But the thing is? Yeah. I love you. I loved crayon-breaky Willow and I love...scary veiny Willow. So if I'm going out, it's here. If you wanna kill the world? Well, then start with me. I've earned that.
The last relationship for Willow came during season 7. Willow met and started to date a Potential Slayer by the name of Kennedy. As a brief side note, I just want to say that Kennedy may very well be the most hated character in all of the Buffyverse.
On the mortal enemies’ side of the fence, there may only be a couple who would fit that category. The first? Warren. The man who had what seemed to be a pathological hatred of women. With two bullets he killed Tara, and wounded Buffy. And due to this, Willow lost the woman that meant the world to her. After going evil, Willow hunted him down and flayed him alive. She tortured him before she killed him.
While she definitely regretted the violence, part of her still hated the man. In one season 7 episode, (The Killer In Me) due to a spell cast by Amy, he came back to haunt her. After realizing she wasn’t responsible for Tara’s death, (And forcing herself to overcome the idea she was Warren--long story.) Willow was finally beginning to work through the issues she had.
My Obsession With Willow: Or, What Do You See In Her?!
The first time I ever saw Willow Rosenberg was when I decided to watch my first episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. I had heard that it was an interesting show (understatement!) and wanted to give it a shot. The episode in question was a first run of season 3’s Dead Man’s Party, and I simply adored this quirky, nerdish, computer obsessed girl that tried to stand up to Buffy Summers. A girl who was struggling to learn about magic, and yet, at the same time, was utterly terrified that she would fail a class.
Oh, and I mustn’t forget the frog fear. That strange phobia was revealed in What’s My Line, Part One when she screamed in her sleep “don’t warn the tadpoles!” If frogs ever actually rained from the sky, she wouldn’t be much help--at least, not in season 2 or 3. It was never mentioned again after Killed By Death, so maybe someone finally helped get her over it.
Willow also had a big heart--she proved how much she loved her friends by staying in Sunnydale at the end of season 3. She could have gone to practically any school in the country, and even was eligible for a few in Europe if she had chosen to attend them. Instead, she chose to stay and help fight the evil in Sunnydale.
"Actually, this isn't about you. Although I'm fond, don't get me wrong, of you. The other night, you know, being captured and all, facing off with Faith. Things just, kind of, got clear. I mean, you've been fighting evil here for three years, and I've helped some, and now we're supposed to decide what we want to do with our lives. And I just realized that that's what I want to do. Fight evil, help people. I mean, I think it's worth doing. And I don't think you do it because you have to. It's a good fight, Buffy, and I want in."
--Willow, in Choices.
Below you see just how hard she tried to make Buffy stay home, and not run away for the second time. That was the type of person that Willow Rosenberg was. Before the magic addictions, before the drama, and the loss of friends and loved ones to various misfortunes. This was back when she was still learning how to float a pencil, by the way.
“No! I don't just mean that. I mean, my life! You know? I, um...I'm having all sorts of... I'm dating, I'm having serious dating with a *werewolf*, a-and I'm studying witchcraft and killing vampires, and I didn't have anyone (starts sobbing) to talk to about all this scary life stuff. And you were my best friend.”
-Willow, having a mini-breakdown as she tries to keep Buffy from running away again, in Dead Man’s Party.
Starting in season 3, (at least for me) you could watch the young awkward redhead blossom into a strong, loving woman, with a penchant for magic. While there were hardships and traumas, she overcame them. Sadly, she couldn’t always fix things, but she did her best.
And after everything she went through, and everything she did in the course of the series, she was still at heart a good person. She was more cautious with her magic, but after nearly destroying the world that’s to be expected.
What Keeps One Interested In Willow?
The complex path which the character walked made for an interesting experience. She was a good person who--while she had good intentions--nearly lost everything in an attempt to stay happy. She couldn’t fix everything, no matter how much magic she had. She was flawed, and that makes for an interesting person.
Her strengths were the fact that she was good with magic. Prior to her introduction to magic, she was also an expert hacker/computer whiz who was even approached by a reputable computer company about a possible future with them. (What’s My Line, Part One-also when she finally met Oz.) However, that was also a weakness as she became so powerful that she went insane when someone close to her (Tara) died.
She was a good friend that everyone could rely on. And while she didn’t always enjoy being the responsible one, she accepted the role with dignity. She had her good times and her bad times, but she still kept going. She may have bent, and come within inches of completely shattering, but her soul still did not break under the weight of her trials and tribulations.
Another major weakness for her was the obsession with controlling everything. Due to this, she stole a memory of an argument from Tara. She wanted to erase something, rather than discuss it, and she did to Tara what Glory had once done. Took something from her mind. Because of this, the two broke up. And Willow did whatever she had to if it meant getting Tara to come back to her.
She even tried to give up magic, but it didn’t last. As I mentioned earlier in the history section, she learned that she couldn’t simply give up magic. But after everything, she would not allow it to control her any longer. She studied as much as she could to get back to nature, and get away from the evil.
The fact that her story never ended makes the character fascinating to me. It is more than likely that which causes fanfic to continue to be written. I know it is the depth and complexity of her character that makes me write for her.
Both here, and in various fanfics and RPG’s, such as btvsats_20.
And so, in the end Willow Rosenberg has come full circle. In one year, she traveled from being the Big Bad (nearly destroying the world in season 6), to what could only be considered a few moments as a goddess incarnate. She learned from her experiences with black magic, and tried to change.
What does the future hold in store for Miss Rosenberg? Only Joss Whedon (and the writers of fanfic, of course) knows for sure.
One thing is certain: Her journey is not yet complete.
Links
Fanlistings
Magical. Includes quotes from Willow from every season.
Suddenly Painless. A fanlisting for Willow/Oz fans.
Eternal Witch: The Unofficial Willow Fanlisting.
Love You: The Willow And Xander Fanlisting.
Willow Related Groups
willowficathon
willowoz
world_of_willow
willotaraicons
willowxander
alyson_daily
willow_fans
Willfic.
BetterBuffyFics. You can find many more Willow related fanfics through this group.
Non-fiction: The Discussion of Willow In Other Places
with_character. Go through the Memeories section for this group, and you can find character studies for the different seasons of Willow.
The Wikipedia entry for Willow Rosenberg.
Willow’s Problem: It’s Not About Power. This is a fascinating essay about the magic addiction story arc, and what Willow’s actual psychological problems more than likely were. Dozens of other interesting essays can be found at Near Her Always.
Fan fiction That’s Worth A Look
Deus Otiosis. Set after season 7’s Empty Places, Willow thinks about the choices she’s made that led her to this point. Rated PG-13; written by Annakovsky.
A Girl With Kaleidoscope Eyes. Willow is haunted after Tara’s death. Disturbing, creepy, and very well-written. Rated PG-13; written by Kyra Cullinan.
Warmth. Written by thete1; this is set after season 6. Willow and Xander finally talk about things-very intense, and a wonderful story. Rated R. There are mentions of Willow/Tara, Willow/Oz, and a bit of Willow/Xander is thrown in there for good measure.
Snapshots: Willow. Written by Northlight. As the title suggests, you can read about snapshots of Willow’s life; from a very young age, until her life with Tara. Beautifully written. Rated PG-13.
Disparity, written by velvetandlace. Set in between the end of season 6, and the beginning of season 7, this story takes a good hard look at what Willow became, and how she tried to fix it. A very moving story that shows just how afraid she was to go home and face everyone. Rated PG-13.
What The Carpenter Saw, written by raedbard. This is a wonderful Willow/Xander friendship story, set in the middle of Empty Places. Xander sees a lot--especially just how much Willow has changed over the years. Perfectly captures how each keeps the other sane. I highly recommend reading it. Rated PG-13
And The First Shall Be Last, written by invisionary. Post-Chosen, Willow visits Xander and remembers how things used to be. Not rated, but would probably gain a PG rating.
Valley of Ashes, by hannasus. Set after season 5; Willow goes to break the news of Buffy’s death to Angel. Excellent showing of how Willow is just an observer that doesn’t know what has been going on with Angel and his team.