001 || Accidental Video

[idkmybfftrash]

[The video feed cuts in to offer you a view of one (1) tanned, scarred, mafia assassin, face eating lawn. Said face turns toward the camera and red eyes blink open, glaring death, murder, dismemberment, mass genocide and likely nuclear strike somewhere in there as well, which is all kind of ruined the next second when he spits out a couple blades

Comments

[alwaysaboom]

[Oh great, another one.]

Whoever you are, this isn't your world.

[idkmybfftrash]

[ What, another one? What the hell is this? He really needs to start paying more attention to the new hires. Regardless he doesn't get it. ]

Not shit, I don't live in Japan nor would I ever be here if it wasn't absolutely necessary.

[alwaysaboom]

This isn't Japan, this is Wonderland. You're stuck here like all of us.

[idkmybfftrash]

[ Blink. Uh. Wut? ]

...You've got to be fucking kidding me.

[He stares for a second, eyes narrowed, before coming to a conclusion.]

You're all batshit, aren't you? I got dumped in a goddamn loony bin.

[alwaysaboom]

The universe is insane. Anything else would be redundant.

[idkmybfftrash]

...Yeaaaaah, right, that's fucking great, where's the exit?

[alwaysaboom]

Tell me if you ever find out.

As far as we all know, there isn't one.

[idkmybfftrash]

[ A snort. ]

If there's a way to get in there's a way to get out.

[alwaysaboom]

Obviously, but no one has found one.

[idkmybfftrash]

[ There's a frown here and he thinks for a minute. ]

Who's in charge?

[alwaysaboom]

That's debatable, but most seem to assume the Queen of Hearts. She lives behind the mirrors. It seems more likely that Wonderland itself is sentient.

[idkmybfftrash]

Behind... the mirrors.

[This said in a 'You've got to be shitting me' tone.]

[alwaysaboom]

There is a paralell world behind the mirrors.

[In a 'welcome to hell' tone of voice]

[idkmybfftrash]

[That's... not the strangest thing he's heard, but pretty far up there on the list.]

And monsters in the closets too?

[alwaysaboom]

Yes, occasionally.

[idkmybfftrash]

...This is the stupidest place I've ever been.

Which is saying something.