Angst of the week
Someone said to me that this fiction thing was a bit like having an affair.
Which got me to wondering, which bit?
It certainly ticks quite a lot of the boxes.
Naughty fun: tick.
Secrecy: tick.
Guilt: tick.
Consequences: well... this is a tricky one. Strictly speaking I suppose you could argue that there aren't any, that this is just a harmless crush that hurts nobody, the sexual equivalent of calorie-free ice cream. But then again, am I doing my RL guy a wrong by focusing such time and energy and imagination on my imaginary ones?
I rationalise it by arguing that it makes me happy, and that's a good thing for him; that it gives me an outlet for a lot of 'midlife crisis' stuff he really doesn't want to know about, so that's a good thing for him too; and that it gives me ideas for research and experimentation, and those are most definitely a good thing for him and he has enjoyed them a lot... but then I worry, should I be hiding my hidden agenda?
He doesn't seem to mind, and doesn't want the details... but how would I feel if my chap was spending all his spare time fantasising about some 1970s TV actress getting her kit off and having hot girl-on-girl sex?
I like to think it would make me laugh heartily and say 'Good for you'.
But part of me is not so sure...