SUPER SMASH BROS KINK MEME

[karma_kalisutah]

ANONYMOUSLY post a pairing and a kink. This meme is open to ALL pairings and ALL kinks. Yaoi, Yuri, and Het is welcome here. Fluffy kinks, gory kinks, gross kinks, what have you. Even Gen if that is, as they say, what floats your boat. Anything goes! It. Doesn't. Matter. Just post it, Anons!

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[anonymous]

Snake's sexy. He's sexy in that ludicrous over-the-top kind of way that only women tend to be in most of these game worlds; he's fanservice for the female masses, and he's been like that ever since some creator looked down at his brush pen and sketched in a couple of ass straps.

Samus is much, much sexier. Snake's only been sexy for the past seven years, but Samus has been sexy since before she even had a third dimension, back when Snake was running over squeaky Japanese sand and looked exactly like Mel Gibson. She's changed a little over the years, but the way she looks in a bikini or a bodysuit is a mind-blowing, pant-tightening constant, and even when Snake had been able to pick his jaw off the floor, he hadn't bargained on the fact that he got out of most social situations with the devastating combination of his voice (dying along with his voice actor's poor overstrained larynx) and his ass. Communicating with women, talking to women, even believing women are inherently just as capable as men - all of those things are beyond him, as he was never brave enough to try to learn.

So Samus says no. He's not surprised, but as he leaves he feels a pang, or something like that. He's not too proud to realise that normally he was the one who rejected other people, so he could keep his pride, so he could be alone. It's never happened this way around before.

--

He finds Falcon when he's looking for something else to spend his time on, and Falcon's drinking something that doesn't have a label on it. He decides he'll spend his time on Falcon.

"Bad day?” he asks, looking at the way Falcon's knocking it back - hungry, unsavouring. He looks at Falcon's lips around the neck of the bottle. He looks away. “Not safe to drive like that. Over forty per cent of road collisions are caused by drink. You don't want that.”

Falcon's a proud man. It's something they have in common. He's a vain man too, and that makes another thing they have in common - if Snake wasn't so proud, like Falcon, he'd admit to the time and money he spends-wastes colouring all his clone-blond and death-grey hairs a uniform shade of dark brown. It makes Snake think he'd know how Falcon works. People are a damn mystery to Snake, and anything at all he has in common with anyone is a starting point.

He looks up. Squirms. Gets out another bottle and hands it to Snake.

Snake considers this a successful social engagement.

--