Subtle Distractions: Super Vent
So I'm still unemployed, uninsured, taking care of mom, living at home, and trying to handle my psychological issues completely unmedicated and without professional assistance. Go me, now that I have those general facts/complaints out of the way... Details.
Anyone who suggests any job seeking advice will be shot on sight, it's nothing personal really I'm just sick of it right now, it makes me feel like no one thinks I'm trying hard enough. Maybe I'm not, it depends on what your standards are, but I'm not willing to suck dick or pay $200 for a job lead, desperation has not robbed me of my standards, and frankly I don't have $200. And on a side note, Careerbuilder.com with its job recommendation emails can suck a dick, 99.8% of that shit has nothing to do with me. Really, if you know anything about my math skills you know how laughable suggesting that I apply to be a "Tax Staff Accountant" is. And a big FUCK YOU to fake job posts on craigslist that steal my email address and send me junk mail.
I need a new distraction. I think I'm going to start sewing again. This all sounds well and good, but my motivation to do much of anything has been completely in the toilet. I want to try to get back into loli stuff, but it's hard when I'm barely online and job hunting priortizes over checking LJ forums. I miss it a lot, just been feeling lonely and miss getting to look pretty.
My laptop is dying, it makes horrible grinding noises whenever the fan comes on, unfortunately that's every 10 seconds or so. I can't bear killing it so I've been avoiding using it and using mommy's computer instead, I can't say this is my favorite arrangement ever. So I'm not on the net anywhere near as much as I used to be. In a small way it's something of a blessing in disguise, I wanted to be on the net less anyway. Mom and I take turns job hunting, I check my facebook, email, etc. and then I'm done because Joey's usually standing over my shoulder haunting for the computer at this point.
Sometimes I apartment hunt, mostly it's wishful thinking, apartments around here are stupidly expensive.
I'm slowly starting to wedding plan, why? Because I'm planning on making half of the crap myself and I need time. I don't feel like I can talk to hardly anyone about it EVER excepting a few friends, Chris, and my mom. And it's not even like I want to talk about it that often, but I dread mentioning it ever to anyone and it hurts me. I saw 2 of my aunts while visiting my poppy at the hospital 2 weeks ago and what did they do, examined my ring, said it was nice, then proceeded to tell me "Don't do it." Well screw you. You're my fucking family, doesn't that make you obligated to at least pretend to be happy for me? No instead its sarcasm and bullshit, then my mom wonders why I scowl when she starts making a big fuss about how i "have" to invite all her sisters. I thought this thing was supposed to be a party celebrating a life event full of supportive people that are happy for you. For some people this entails family, in this case I say no. So what if I want a red dress instead of a white one and am considering a set up for a Soul Caliber II tournament.
Anyone who suggests any job seeking advice will be shot on sight, it's nothing personal really I'm just sick of it right now, it makes me feel like no one thinks I'm trying hard enough. Maybe I'm not, it depends on what your standards are, but I'm not willing to suck dick or pay $200 for a job lead, desperation has not robbed me of my standards, and frankly I don't have $200. And on a side note, Careerbuilder.com with its job recommendation emails can suck a dick, 99.8% of that shit has nothing to do with me. Really, if you know anything about my math skills you know how laughable suggesting that I apply to be a "Tax Staff Accountant" is. And a big FUCK YOU to fake job posts on craigslist that steal my email address and send me junk mail.
I need a new distraction. I think I'm going to start sewing again. This all sounds well and good, but my motivation to do much of anything has been completely in the toilet. I want to try to get back into loli stuff, but it's hard when I'm barely online and job hunting priortizes over checking LJ forums. I miss it a lot, just been feeling lonely and miss getting to look pretty.
My laptop is dying, it makes horrible grinding noises whenever the fan comes on, unfortunately that's every 10 seconds or so. I can't bear killing it so I've been avoiding using it and using mommy's computer instead, I can't say this is my favorite arrangement ever. So I'm not on the net anywhere near as much as I used to be. In a small way it's something of a blessing in disguise, I wanted to be on the net less anyway. Mom and I take turns job hunting, I check my facebook, email, etc. and then I'm done because Joey's usually standing over my shoulder haunting for the computer at this point.
Sometimes I apartment hunt, mostly it's wishful thinking, apartments around here are stupidly expensive.
I'm slowly starting to wedding plan, why? Because I'm planning on making half of the crap myself and I need time. I don't feel like I can talk to hardly anyone about it EVER excepting a few friends, Chris, and my mom. And it's not even like I want to talk about it that often, but I dread mentioning it ever to anyone and it hurts me. I saw 2 of my aunts while visiting my poppy at the hospital 2 weeks ago and what did they do, examined my ring, said it was nice, then proceeded to tell me "Don't do it." Well screw you. You're my fucking family, doesn't that make you obligated to at least pretend to be happy for me? No instead its sarcasm and bullshit, then my mom wonders why I scowl when she starts making a big fuss about how i "have" to invite all her sisters. I thought this thing was supposed to be a party celebrating a life event full of supportive people that are happy for you. For some people this entails family, in this case I say no. So what if I want a red dress instead of a white one and am considering a set up for a Soul Caliber II tournament.