[Private Entry]
...I can't believe this. Any of it.
Okay, let me start from the beginning.
First off, I went to ask a question and met a whole load of Blueses. One of them says his creator calls him V2. I'm still going to call him Blues though, because he was the first one not from my world I was conscious when I met. I asked another one before hand and met some other people too. That wasn't where the bad parts came in.
When I was talking to V2, I found out some bad things about his creator, who was an alternate of mine I thought I otherwise liked. Well for me though, Navi abuse is unforgivable in any form. I also figured out I was wrong about the younger alternate. I totally misjudged them both.
I made up with the younger one for the most part, (even though I think I made someone cry. I hate that.) and met a version of my mother as well. I...couldn't help crying. I've been without parents, actual parents, my whole life, and...
Anyways, I met a lot of interesting people then, including a mess of Blueses (I had to resist from hugging a few of them). There was even a female robot Blues! She was actually pretty cool after I got used to her a little. I also met a few mes, including a younger one (he was about six or so) and a transsexual. He She was cool, and I talked with her and her Navi for a bit each.
I also met a werewolf called Ska. He was cool and fun. He kind of flirted with me, I think.
I ran into my younger alternate again, and we had a talk about loss. It seems we're more similar than I thought originally.
Also, against my better judgement, I confronted my older alt about V2. I probably shouldn't have, but I just can't let that sort of thing go. We started arguing, and if it weren't for the Anti-Violence field we would've gotten into a fight. When he left, he told me Proto likes me...in that way. ...Which brings me to my point.
...I can't believe it. Proto can't possibly be in love with me, not after everything I've done to him. I mean, I suspected, but I guess I didn't want to realize it, because then I would have to deal with hurting him...and I don't want to hurt him. He's the first and only real friend I ever had.
...My alt is right. I'm not good enough for him. I'm not good enough for anyone. No wonder Enzan hated me--he saw into my mind. He could never forgive me.
...I can't forgive myself either.
Okay, let me start from the beginning.
First off, I went to ask a question and met a whole load of Blueses. One of them says his creator calls him V2. I'm still going to call him Blues though, because he was the first one not from my world I was conscious when I met. I asked another one before hand and met some other people too. That wasn't where the bad parts came in.
When I was talking to V2, I found out some bad things about his creator, who was an alternate of mine I thought I otherwise liked. Well for me though, Navi abuse is unforgivable in any form. I also figured out I was wrong about the younger alternate. I totally misjudged them both.
I made up with the younger one for the most part, (even though I think I made someone cry. I hate that.) and met a version of my mother as well. I...couldn't help crying. I've been without parents, actual parents, my whole life, and...
Anyways, I met a lot of interesting people then, including a mess of Blueses (I had to resist from hugging a few of them). There was even a female robot Blues! She was actually pretty cool after I got used to her a little. I also met a few mes, including a younger one (he was about six or so) and a transsexual. He She was cool, and I talked with her and her Navi for a bit each.
I also met a werewolf called Ska. He was cool and fun. He kind of flirted with me, I think.
I ran into my younger alternate again, and we had a talk about loss. It seems we're more similar than I thought originally.
Also, against my better judgement, I confronted my older alt about V2. I probably shouldn't have, but I just can't let that sort of thing go. We started arguing, and if it weren't for the Anti-Violence field we would've gotten into a fight. When he left, he told me Proto likes me...in that way. ...Which brings me to my point.
...I can't believe it. Proto can't possibly be in love with me, not after everything I've done to him. I mean, I suspected, but I guess I didn't want to realize it, because then I would have to deal with hurting him...and I don't want to hurt him. He's the first and only real friend I ever had.
...My alt is right. I'm not good enough for him. I'm not good enough for anyone. No wonder Enzan hated me--he saw into my mind. He could never forgive me.
...I can't forgive myself either.