I thought you didn't want to hear from me. That is why I haven't said anything...
I am not really sure where to start. So I guess I’ll just start somewhere and see where it takes me...
I did not intend on going to La Crosse. I was supposed to be at work on Friday and then early on Saturday. I was not going to be able to have the time. I found out late on Thursday that I didn’t have to work on Friday. I decided around 5 o’clock on Thursday night that I was going to go. I had no plans. No one knew that was I was going to be there- not even Amber. I did not lie to you. The last time I talked to you, I wasn’t going to La Crosse. I am sorry that I did not inform you that I was going. I did not realize that it would lead us to this.
As far as what I have said to you, it is all true. I would like to get to know you better. I would like to see you and hang out with you. And if something would have happened, so be it. I am attracted to you. But if you are saying that the only reason you were there for me is because you expected something from me, then I am hurt. I thought you were there for me because I was hurt and wanting to work through some things. I thought you wanted to be my friend. I told you, specifically, that Amber was someone I could see myself with later. That doesn’t change just because we are in a fight. I wanted your opinion because I was sure I was probably being as big of an ass as she was, and I wanted to be called out on my shit. You were there for me, and I appreciate that.
I have not been well this last couple of weeks. I have gone through a lot of things that are in no way, shape, or form related to Amber. My depression and insomnia have come back- I have been a little unstable. I needed to be around people that cared about me. I needed to be physically surrounded by people that cared for me. I was about to cut on Thursday and I just put the blade down and decided to go to La Crosse. I wanted to see Krys and HR. I wanted to meet Mary and get to know all the people that they knew.
And I do not regret my decision. I met a bunch of cool people. People who showed genuine interest in getting to know me on a friend level. That is what I needed. And I made that decision. If you can’t be happy for me for putting my own mental stability above anything else, then I understand if you don’t want to talk to me anymore.
I don’t know... I am sorry if I hurt you. But as I said, I did not lie to you. I would have liked to hang with you. I would have liked to get to know you. I never said that I wished you hadn’t let Amber step on your game- I said that if you were so interested, you should have been more direct. Again, I am sorry that we miss-communicated. But it is my life, and I am allowed to make my own choices- whether I hurt because of them or not.
Again, I understand if you still do not want to talk to me. I also understand if you do not believe anything I said. You think I lied, and it is hard to go back from that with someone. I do appreciate the fact that you aren’t going to take this out on Amber. You two have been friends for some time, and I wouldn’t want that to be ruined because of something that has gone wrong between you and me. I hope that this shows you how I feel about what happened. And, one more time, I do apologize for any misunderstandings between us.
Hope You Have A Great Day Babe,
Lissa.
I did not intend on going to La Crosse. I was supposed to be at work on Friday and then early on Saturday. I was not going to be able to have the time. I found out late on Thursday that I didn’t have to work on Friday. I decided around 5 o’clock on Thursday night that I was going to go. I had no plans. No one knew that was I was going to be there- not even Amber. I did not lie to you. The last time I talked to you, I wasn’t going to La Crosse. I am sorry that I did not inform you that I was going. I did not realize that it would lead us to this.
As far as what I have said to you, it is all true. I would like to get to know you better. I would like to see you and hang out with you. And if something would have happened, so be it. I am attracted to you. But if you are saying that the only reason you were there for me is because you expected something from me, then I am hurt. I thought you were there for me because I was hurt and wanting to work through some things. I thought you wanted to be my friend. I told you, specifically, that Amber was someone I could see myself with later. That doesn’t change just because we are in a fight. I wanted your opinion because I was sure I was probably being as big of an ass as she was, and I wanted to be called out on my shit. You were there for me, and I appreciate that.
I have not been well this last couple of weeks. I have gone through a lot of things that are in no way, shape, or form related to Amber. My depression and insomnia have come back- I have been a little unstable. I needed to be around people that cared about me. I needed to be physically surrounded by people that cared for me. I was about to cut on Thursday and I just put the blade down and decided to go to La Crosse. I wanted to see Krys and HR. I wanted to meet Mary and get to know all the people that they knew.
And I do not regret my decision. I met a bunch of cool people. People who showed genuine interest in getting to know me on a friend level. That is what I needed. And I made that decision. If you can’t be happy for me for putting my own mental stability above anything else, then I understand if you don’t want to talk to me anymore.
I don’t know... I am sorry if I hurt you. But as I said, I did not lie to you. I would have liked to hang with you. I would have liked to get to know you. I never said that I wished you hadn’t let Amber step on your game- I said that if you were so interested, you should have been more direct. Again, I am sorry that we miss-communicated. But it is my life, and I am allowed to make my own choices- whether I hurt because of them or not.
Again, I understand if you still do not want to talk to me. I also understand if you do not believe anything I said. You think I lied, and it is hard to go back from that with someone. I do appreciate the fact that you aren’t going to take this out on Amber. You two have been friends for some time, and I wouldn’t want that to be ruined because of something that has gone wrong between you and me. I hope that this shows you how I feel about what happened. And, one more time, I do apologize for any misunderstandings between us.
Hope You Have A Great Day Babe,
Lissa.