Innate.
People I seem to be realizing more and more often (or at least myself) are truthfully innately bad, now don't get me wrong I really am generally a positive person, in all fact I'm one of the only positive people I know. Which obviously is getting to me because I am no longer so positive. This thought process came to me at 11 oclock today which if your Canadian and it's november 11th is the integral "moment of silence" the whole two minutes of it. But what was 99% of Canada doing during this niche in their day... not thinking of the war and the veterans that's for damn sure. The first thing that went through my brain was wow, awkward not saying anything in front of people is thought down upon in our society... which is another post on its own. The second thought of mine was, hmmm I should be thinking about the veterans but really I'm thinking of the person I like, thirdly I'm bored, fourthly wow people are assholes they don't even look into the moment of silence, WAIT I'm not looking into the moment of silence though. Am I a bad person for this, am I good person because i know I should care more... I think I do care more but put into this situation Im to cool to 'say it... Wait does THAT make me a bad person and what happened to when I really didn't care about being cool... Oh shit I forgot I've always cared WAY to much about how people feel... funny look at me... I'm so different than everyone. Is that good. And why the fuck is that asshole honking his car doesn't he realize it's 11 I hope when he does he feels like the biggest asshole in the world... Haha oh wait that's me. YEah this was my thought process the full two minutes. A lot of grounds to cover when your in front of people and unconfortable. SO I wonder how many people did the exact same thing as me but did or didn't feel bad and I wonder that due to peoples affliction towards what society thinks of them makes them bad people or always left to there own ammends they will always be bad because it's in their nature or when left alone they will be good but around people not so much. Because I am now writing a huge entry on this alone, but around people I pretended to care but in all actuaity obviousy didn't all that much. I'm so confused. Am I (WE) bad people.