/A Perfect Day for A Love Declaration/ Two
a perfect day for a love declaration
day two ★ where it was (almost) like how
it used to be . . .
“You’re a jerk, Shim Changmin. A tall abandoning jerk who left for Japan without contacting any of his friends.”
“Are you honestly going to sound like a girl, Kibum? Because you’re beginning to get on my nerves with your tone.” I replied, snark laced in my voice.
Kibum stuck out his tongue at me, and I rolled my eyes at his immature response. He had always done these things back in college to infuriate me, and I had always prayed that he would outgrow them. I guess those prayers haven’t been answered yet because after five years, he was still the same immature creep I shared a dorm with.
But to be honest, the thought that he hadn’t changed since then comforted me a little. Not that I would ever admit to that, but it felt reassuring.
“It’s been awhile, Min. I’m surprised you even remembered me after all these years,” he said, looking at me knowingly and grinning. I managed a half-smile, half-smirk back and shrugged.
“Who could forget someone as gay as you?” I replied, earning a swift punch on my shoulder. I rubbed the sore spot and laughed at him (or at least, I attempted to). “I’m kidding, Kim. I was busy, you know how it is.”
He gave me a look but nodded anyway. He shifted in his seat, pulling out his cellular phone and checked for messages. A smile blew out on his face and I knew at an instant that it was a message from Yeonhee. I clicked my tongue, raising my eyebrow and he looked at me curiously, placing his phone back into his pocket.
“Was that Yeonhee?” I asked. He nodded in reply, almost cheekily. “You’re still together? Really?”
“Yeah, is that so hard to believe? How about you? Any girls I should know about?”
I shrugged. “You should ask my parents about that.”
Kibum sat up straighter, surprised. He peered oddly at me, studying my expression. Then he clapped his hands once and gave a shout that might have meant, “Oh I get it!”
“So they went through with it?”
“Yes.”
“How old is she?”
“Twenty. She still acts likes a kid.”
“That’s because twenty is a child, Shim! You’re robbing a baby its’ youth!”
“As if I’d touch her.”
Kibum thought about that for a second and nodded. “You have a point there.”
“Geez, man, your parents petrify me.”
“They tend to do that.”
He shook his head. “And you’re okay with all of this?” He made gestures with his hands to emphasize a point. I had to bite back a sarcastic remark.
“Of course not.”
“But you won’t go against them.”
He got me there, and I threw him an annoyed look. He shrugged, and then looked at the time on his watch.
“It’s not like Yoona to be late for dinner. Usually, she’d be the first one here if there’s food.”
At the mention of her name, my chest tightened. I threw Kibum’s oblivious figure another filthy look and breathed deeply. Pull yourself together, Shim. It’s just a name. Her name never bothered you like this before.
I cleared my throat. “How is Yoona, by the way? I always thought that if you and Yeonhee broke up, the two of you would become an item.”
Kibum made a face and shook his head. “That’s scary, Changmin. Yoona’s like a little sister to me. I would never take advantage of her like that.” He shrugged. “Besides, she’s not interested in relationships.”
I raised my eyebrow. “That’s not like her.”
“I know. She was always the girl in love during college. Doe-eyed about romance and Shakespeare.”
“What happened?”
He shook his head. “I don’t know. Nothing happened. After you left and graduation, she’d started to come down to earth and reality. She went out on dates sometimes, but those relationships never lasted long enough for her to introduce them to me or her parents.”
Kibum stared at me. “You were probably the last guy she introduced to them.”
I lowered my gaze and shrugged. “Funny. She introduced you too.”
“As a friend.”
“Me too.”
He scoffed. “Huh. Could’ve fooled me.”
“Yah Kim Kibum, I-”
“I’m sorry I’m so late!”
“Excuse me. I’m late for this class and I really don’t want to walk all the way towards the front where my seat is because that would be embarrassing so, uh- can I sit here?”
“Whatever.”
“Yoona.”
“What?”
“My name’s Yoona. ‘Whatever, Yoona’. That way it won’t sound so awkward.”
Yoona came in almost tripping, with the same sweet smile on her face when I first met her. Her smile was the first thing I saw when I looked up from my book that day in class. It was warm and welcoming...
Beautiful, my brain supplied. I inwardly scowled. Nonsense.
“Sooyoung wasn’t going to let me out of the house until I agreed to go out with that musician she wants to set me up with.”
She bowed a couple of times, apologizing (Kibum was giving her a slightly hard time, teasing her by acting like it was a big deal to be early for a dinner) before stopping to look at me.
By that time, I had already stood up to greet her. “Yoona. It’s nice to see you.”
“Long time no see… Changmin-shii.”
~ ~ ~
He didn’t like it one bit. The way I said his name, so politely. So formally. I’ve never spoken to him in that way, not once, not even on the day we met. To be honest, it had felt strange in my mouth- foreign and surreal. I almost hated it myself. But if I had said his name any other way, that would have brought me back-
“Changmin.”
“Eh? How about oppa?”
“No.” He sighs. “No shii, no oppa. Just my name. Plain and simple. Okay, Yoona?”
“Okay.” Changmin...
Dinner was awkward at best. I asked him a few generic questions (Where was he staying at? His parents. What was he doing these days? He was junior-associate of a law firm in Tokyo.). Thankfully he replied and acted naturally. He even asked me in the same way (he asked if I still lived at the same apartment? And I told him I did and that the roof still leaked) to avoid any odd glances from Kibum.
If Kibum hadn’t been there, I wouldn’t have survived it. I never let my gaze linger long enough towards his direction.
Kibum texted me right after the dinner. Just as I closed my apartment door and released the breath I had been holding in; asking me why I wasn’t energetic today to see our old friend. I replied with a fake excuse of having a fake headache, and tossed myself onto my bed - burying my face under a pillow.
/Try lying better next time. I can tell even through texts. Whatever it is, it’s all in the past right?/ - Kibum
All in the past. It would be easy to say that if my heart wasn’t feeling differently. What was that saying again? Your first love never dies? This was a desperate cliché written all over it. My put my hand on my heart and sighed. Whatever it was that I felt for him was still here- I only learned how to hide it.
/I’m not ready for him to be back./ I reply, typing slowly. His reply came almost instantly.
/No one’s ever ready when it comes to love. Get rest, Yoona./ -- Kibum
“I know.” I said under my breath, “no one’s ever ready…”
A framed photograph catches my eye and I reach over for it. The image was from before graduation with Kibum, Yeonhee, Sooyoung and him. Kibum and Yeonhee were holding hands and laughing, smiling and staring more at each other than at the camera. Sooyoung was playing with my hair and laughing, while I did the same with hers. Changmin sat between me and Kibum, that mysterious aura looming over him despite the smile he had on his face. His hand was around my waist (I remember how the touch had made my stomach feel butterflies for the rest of the day) while his other hand was on Kibum’s shoulder.
“Why do you pat my head?”
“Because you stop moving when I do. You’re like a child.”
“So that’s your way of saying I’m immature?”
“Among other ways, yes.” He grins. Unevenly.
I smile despite myself. “Shut up.”
I traced the photograph with my finger and sighed. It was just a college crush, Yoona. You don’t need this again.
As I set the frame back on the table, the doorbell rang. With a sigh, I pulled myself off the bed and walked briskly towards the door, half expecting it to be Sooyoung (for a late night chat) at the step when I stopped short.
“Changmin… shii?”
Changmin stood outside my door, with his jacket on and was slightly shivering. To say that I was surprised would be an understatement of what I truly felt. “What are you doing here? Come inside, you’re shivering.”
“No, I just…” he stopped himself and cleared his throat, “I never got your number. I figured you must’ve changed yours.”
I shook my head slowly, still confused. “I didn’t change my number.”
He nodded. “I see. Well then goodnight.”
“Wait.” He turned, and I was tongue-tied. What was I supposed to say?
“What is it?”
“I… welcome back.”
Shim Changmin smiled that uneven smile despite his shivering, and pat my head. Just like he used to. My chest tightened.
He shook his head at me and shrugged, taking a step forward. With a small wave, he called out:
“Whatever Yoona.”
The tears are warm against my cheeks.
I'm enjoying myself. Can you tell? This is the longest chapter I have ever written. I'm surprised at myself TT
day two ★ where it was (almost) like how
it used to be . . .
“You’re a jerk, Shim Changmin. A tall abandoning jerk who left for Japan without contacting any of his friends.”
“Are you honestly going to sound like a girl, Kibum? Because you’re beginning to get on my nerves with your tone.” I replied, snark laced in my voice.
Kibum stuck out his tongue at me, and I rolled my eyes at his immature response. He had always done these things back in college to infuriate me, and I had always prayed that he would outgrow them. I guess those prayers haven’t been answered yet because after five years, he was still the same immature creep I shared a dorm with.
But to be honest, the thought that he hadn’t changed since then comforted me a little. Not that I would ever admit to that, but it felt reassuring.
“It’s been awhile, Min. I’m surprised you even remembered me after all these years,” he said, looking at me knowingly and grinning. I managed a half-smile, half-smirk back and shrugged.
“Who could forget someone as gay as you?” I replied, earning a swift punch on my shoulder. I rubbed the sore spot and laughed at him (or at least, I attempted to). “I’m kidding, Kim. I was busy, you know how it is.”
He gave me a look but nodded anyway. He shifted in his seat, pulling out his cellular phone and checked for messages. A smile blew out on his face and I knew at an instant that it was a message from Yeonhee. I clicked my tongue, raising my eyebrow and he looked at me curiously, placing his phone back into his pocket.
“Was that Yeonhee?” I asked. He nodded in reply, almost cheekily. “You’re still together? Really?”
“Yeah, is that so hard to believe? How about you? Any girls I should know about?”
I shrugged. “You should ask my parents about that.”
Kibum sat up straighter, surprised. He peered oddly at me, studying my expression. Then he clapped his hands once and gave a shout that might have meant, “Oh I get it!”
“So they went through with it?”
“Yes.”
“How old is she?”
“Twenty. She still acts likes a kid.”
“That’s because twenty is a child, Shim! You’re robbing a baby its’ youth!”
“As if I’d touch her.”
Kibum thought about that for a second and nodded. “You have a point there.”
“Geez, man, your parents petrify me.”
“They tend to do that.”
He shook his head. “And you’re okay with all of this?” He made gestures with his hands to emphasize a point. I had to bite back a sarcastic remark.
“Of course not.”
“But you won’t go against them.”
He got me there, and I threw him an annoyed look. He shrugged, and then looked at the time on his watch.
“It’s not like Yoona to be late for dinner. Usually, she’d be the first one here if there’s food.”
At the mention of her name, my chest tightened. I threw Kibum’s oblivious figure another filthy look and breathed deeply. Pull yourself together, Shim. It’s just a name. Her name never bothered you like this before.
I cleared my throat. “How is Yoona, by the way? I always thought that if you and Yeonhee broke up, the two of you would become an item.”
Kibum made a face and shook his head. “That’s scary, Changmin. Yoona’s like a little sister to me. I would never take advantage of her like that.” He shrugged. “Besides, she’s not interested in relationships.”
I raised my eyebrow. “That’s not like her.”
“I know. She was always the girl in love during college. Doe-eyed about romance and Shakespeare.”
“What happened?”
He shook his head. “I don’t know. Nothing happened. After you left and graduation, she’d started to come down to earth and reality. She went out on dates sometimes, but those relationships never lasted long enough for her to introduce them to me or her parents.”
Kibum stared at me. “You were probably the last guy she introduced to them.”
I lowered my gaze and shrugged. “Funny. She introduced you too.”
“As a friend.”
“Me too.”
He scoffed. “Huh. Could’ve fooled me.”
“Yah Kim Kibum, I-”
“I’m sorry I’m so late!”
“Excuse me. I’m late for this class and I really don’t want to walk all the way towards the front where my seat is because that would be embarrassing so, uh- can I sit here?”
“Whatever.”
“Yoona.”
“What?”
“My name’s Yoona. ‘Whatever, Yoona’. That way it won’t sound so awkward.”
Yoona came in almost tripping, with the same sweet smile on her face when I first met her. Her smile was the first thing I saw when I looked up from my book that day in class. It was warm and welcoming...
Beautiful, my brain supplied. I inwardly scowled. Nonsense.
“Sooyoung wasn’t going to let me out of the house until I agreed to go out with that musician she wants to set me up with.”
She bowed a couple of times, apologizing (Kibum was giving her a slightly hard time, teasing her by acting like it was a big deal to be early for a dinner) before stopping to look at me.
By that time, I had already stood up to greet her. “Yoona. It’s nice to see you.”
“Long time no see… Changmin-shii.”
~ ~ ~
He didn’t like it one bit. The way I said his name, so politely. So formally. I’ve never spoken to him in that way, not once, not even on the day we met. To be honest, it had felt strange in my mouth- foreign and surreal. I almost hated it myself. But if I had said his name any other way, that would have brought me back-
“Changmin.”
“Eh? How about oppa?”
“No.” He sighs. “No shii, no oppa. Just my name. Plain and simple. Okay, Yoona?”
“Okay.” Changmin...
Dinner was awkward at best. I asked him a few generic questions (Where was he staying at? His parents. What was he doing these days? He was junior-associate of a law firm in Tokyo.). Thankfully he replied and acted naturally. He even asked me in the same way (he asked if I still lived at the same apartment? And I told him I did and that the roof still leaked) to avoid any odd glances from Kibum.
If Kibum hadn’t been there, I wouldn’t have survived it. I never let my gaze linger long enough towards his direction.
Kibum texted me right after the dinner. Just as I closed my apartment door and released the breath I had been holding in; asking me why I wasn’t energetic today to see our old friend. I replied with a fake excuse of having a fake headache, and tossed myself onto my bed - burying my face under a pillow.
/Try lying better next time. I can tell even through texts. Whatever it is, it’s all in the past right?/ - Kibum
All in the past. It would be easy to say that if my heart wasn’t feeling differently. What was that saying again? Your first love never dies? This was a desperate cliché written all over it. My put my hand on my heart and sighed. Whatever it was that I felt for him was still here- I only learned how to hide it.
/I’m not ready for him to be back./ I reply, typing slowly. His reply came almost instantly.
/No one’s ever ready when it comes to love. Get rest, Yoona./ -- Kibum
“I know.” I said under my breath, “no one’s ever ready…”
A framed photograph catches my eye and I reach over for it. The image was from before graduation with Kibum, Yeonhee, Sooyoung and him. Kibum and Yeonhee were holding hands and laughing, smiling and staring more at each other than at the camera. Sooyoung was playing with my hair and laughing, while I did the same with hers. Changmin sat between me and Kibum, that mysterious aura looming over him despite the smile he had on his face. His hand was around my waist (I remember how the touch had made my stomach feel butterflies for the rest of the day) while his other hand was on Kibum’s shoulder.
“Why do you pat my head?”
“Because you stop moving when I do. You’re like a child.”
“So that’s your way of saying I’m immature?”
“Among other ways, yes.” He grins. Unevenly.
I smile despite myself. “Shut up.”
I traced the photograph with my finger and sighed. It was just a college crush, Yoona. You don’t need this again.
As I set the frame back on the table, the doorbell rang. With a sigh, I pulled myself off the bed and walked briskly towards the door, half expecting it to be Sooyoung (for a late night chat) at the step when I stopped short.
“Changmin… shii?”
Changmin stood outside my door, with his jacket on and was slightly shivering. To say that I was surprised would be an understatement of what I truly felt. “What are you doing here? Come inside, you’re shivering.”
“No, I just…” he stopped himself and cleared his throat, “I never got your number. I figured you must’ve changed yours.”
I shook my head slowly, still confused. “I didn’t change my number.”
He nodded. “I see. Well then goodnight.”
“Wait.” He turned, and I was tongue-tied. What was I supposed to say?
“What is it?”
“I… welcome back.”
Shim Changmin smiled that uneven smile despite his shivering, and pat my head. Just like he used to. My chest tightened.
He shook his head at me and shrugged, taking a step forward. With a small wave, he called out:
“Whatever Yoona.”
The tears are warm against my cheeks.
I'm enjoying myself. Can you tell? This is the longest chapter I have ever written. I'm surprised at myself TT