I live in the fiery depths of hell
Well... my last entry date was Dec 7th... Early, before my buddies and I had scheduled to go to the track. We found out that night, when we got to the track, that it was pro-stock night. No street cars. *Insert about 20 minutes worth of swearing by all my buddies and I* Oh well, then it was on to hell week. aka, finals. I managed to bust out 15 essays and 2 research papers during that week, and survive all my tests. I hated that week. But, you'd figure after finals week, I'd get a break, little vacation time. NO WAY IN HELL!!!!! Finals for me ended Thursday. The same thursday I had to take my mother to the Dr. for her pre op. She needed foot surgery. Friday was the op, and SHE CAN'T HARDLY GO ANYWHERE BY HERSELF NOW!!! So, I, with bad knees, and a mediocre shoulder had to carry her from one end of the house to the other, take car of all the animals, cook, clean, and work a full shift. This shit has continued since the surgery. I work nearly 40 hours, run all errands, cook, clean, take care of animals, all by my self!!! It's my vacation, and I'm now working harder than I did during school. Toss in a little depression because of the holiday season and I'm just praying to get hit by a bus. The holidays are a time for people to spend time with their loved ones. Guess what though, I'm a bit isolated for that. Being tired, in pain, and generally miserable also doesn't help me. Watching a lot of my buddies getting into nice relationships, improoving with their parents, etc, isn't helping. My father still wants to make me disappear, still distant from mother and brother. I'm not willing to intrude on my friend's happiness. Where's a bullet when you need one?