fic: beating right in time. (kurt/blaine)
Title: Beating Right in Time
Pairing: Kurt/Blaine
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 6,267
Summary: As Blaine and Kurt reach the end of their college career, something inside Blaine starts to change. It takes him awhile to realize he wants to propose. Companion piece to "Soul Vacation."
It's Kurt.
Everything's Kurt lately.
Because he just cannot keep his mind off of him. Every time he tries, he fails.
A/N: Well, this is relevant right now. Considering, gay all marriage is now legal in New York. This a bit more happy than my other pieces, so it should be more enjoyable. Hopefully. (:
we're too young
this is never gonna work
that's what they say
love will never let us fall apart
you gotta listen to your heart
listen to your heart; the maine
.
.
Blaine's eyes look so full of aching sadness that Kurt almost believes him for a second, but then he bows his head, a fake little sob emitting from him, and pulls it back up, grinning widely.
"What'd you think?" he asks uncertainly.
Kurt lets out a shaky breath, covering his heart with his hand.
"Ummm.. I'm pretty sure you're going to get the part," he says, laughing. "I really believed you. My heart almost broke for a second."
Blaine laughs shyly. "You're just saying that," he says, cheeks going red.
"No, I'm not," Kurt says, grinning. "You're amazing, Blaine."
He stands up and wraps his arms around Blaine, kissing him lightly on the lips. Blaine reaches up to put his hand just behind Kurt's ear, kissing him gently back.
.
.
Blaine wakes up earlier than usual, his arms stretched across the bed, and he realizes they're no longer wrapped around Kurt. He lifts his head drowsily, squinting around the room, trying to see.
He pushes himself up, sighing, and reaches for his glasses off the bedside table. He shoves them on before throwing the covers off of himself and getting up.
The smell of pancakes and sausage wafts through the hallway as he walks toward the kitchen. Kurt's standing in front of the stove, already dressed and hair slicked back. Blaine takes a seat on one of the barstools at their counter.
"Hello, beautiful," Blaine tries to murmur seductively, but from the fact that he just woke up, it comes out as a croak.
Kurt turns around, chuckling. "Good morning, darling."
"How do you have so much energy?" Blaine asks, laying his head in his arms while still looking at his boyfriend.
"I'm nervous as hell, that's how," Kurt says, loading another pancake onto a plate full them.
"Why?" Blaine asks, rubbing his eyes under his glasses.
Kurt sets the plate in front of him. "Blaine Anderson, do you even listen when I talk?" he asks.
"It's eight in the morning. I'm forgetting stuff," Blaine replies simply, getting up to grab a plate and a fork from the dishwasher.
Kurt shakes his head, sighing and laughing simultaneously. "I'm handing in an application for an internship today. It's for a huge fashion firm in Brooklyn."
"For real?" Blaine asks, suddenly awake, depositing the plate and silverware in front of his stool.
Kurt smiles broadly. "For real."
And Blaine wraps his arms around Kurt's waist, holding him close. "Oh my god, sweetheart, good luck!" He leans forward, kissing him. Pulling away, he keeps his hands resting on Kurt's lower back. "I'm sure you'll get in."
Kurt laughs nervously. "I hope so," he says.
.
.
Blaine watches anxiously as Kurt holds on to the phone for dear life. He's gone as white as a ghost, nothing but fear and nervousness in his expression. He nods over and over, muttering, "yeah," and "okay," and Blaine wishes he could hear what the person was saying on the other end.
"Yes," Kurt says quietly. "Yes, okay-" Pause. "Most definitely-" Another pause. "Yes, yes, of course. Th- thank you. Thank you so much."
Blaine's heart is pounding inside his throat, the introvert inside him about to explode as he waits for Kurt to tell him the answer. Kurt pulls the phone away from him slowly, then hangs it up, breathing hard as he stands there, leaning heavily on the counter for a moment.
"Well?" he asks when he can longer stand Kurt's silence.
"I got in," he whispers. He let's out a noise between a gasp and laugh. Turning around, a huge smile lights up his now-colored face. "I got in!" he shrieks excitedly.
He jumps into Blaine's arms, folding his legs around Blaine's waist as he holds Kurt up easily. And they're kissing and hugging and holding onto each other and Blaine keeps muttering, "Congratulations, congratulations," as Kurt mutters "Oh my God, Oh my God." And it seems like a moment lost in time when it's over and Kurt is still smiling as Blaine lets him down.
"I'm so proud of you, honey," Blaine says as he grips Kurt's face gently, fighting the tears in his eyes, and as Kurt throws his arms around his neck, something clicks inside Blaine.
What, he's not exactly positive.
But he feels like he could live in this day forever, with Kurt wrapped around him, smiling, laughing, crying. Words spark at the tip of his tongue, but he can't get them out, unknowing of what they are, so he settles on just kissing the top of Kurt's head, hugging him tightly.
.
.
Weak, morning sunlight pours into their bedroom, and Blaine squints against it. Kurt is still asleep, cuddling into Blaine's chest, naked skin melting against his. He breathes a contented sigh, burying his face in Kurt's back.
He wishes he could fall back asleep, but his senses are hyperactive at this moment, particularly his sense of touch and hearing. His skin is hot and sweaty underneath the blankets and pressed against Kurt's. He can hear Kurt's soft, gentle breathing, alongside the fierce pounding of his heart raging against his ribs.
He feels like he's falling in love with Kurt all over again.
Each moment he spends with him feels like a treasure. Each night next to him feels like the first, and today wasn't the first time he's had trouble sleeping. Each time the door unlocks and Kurt steps through after a long day at school, he jumps a little, momentarily forgetting that they live together. Each time he wakes up to find Kurt cooking breakfast, his heart swells a little as he sits down, thanking his boyfriend as he sets the food down in front of him.
He still can't get used to it.
Each hug makes his heart race in his chest, as if they're leaving the friendzone for the first time back in high school again. Each kiss sends fireworks erupting around him, as if he's never felt Kurt's lips against his own. Each touch sends chills running down his spine, as if they've never explored each other before, and Blaine wonders if he'll ever stop being surprised that he's in such a healthy relationship with Kurt.
From next to him, Kurt lets out a small moan. He turns his head slowly, looking back at Blaine. His face is close, they only thing Blaine can see without his glasses, and his breath catches a little as he looks at the gorgeous boy.
"Good morning," he whispers.
Kurt kisses his forehead. "I love you," he croaks out.
"I love you too," Blaine says as Kurt turns again, nestling his head back into the pillows.
Blaine wraps his arms tighter around Kurt's waist, falling asleep too.
.
.
Blaine curses as he jumps into his car, shoving the key into the ignition.
He blew the audition, he knows it. He stuttered twice, and his emotions were flat. He just couldn't get his mind into the character. His singing was fine, stronger than ever, but what use was that when he couldn't act the part?
He sighs, speeding down the traffic-jammed streets of New York City.
Well, it's only a Julliard-produced play. It isn't like it's actually Broadway. But getting this part would've really helped him get there.
He bites down on his cheek, holding in more curses.
He can't seem to be focusing on anything lately. Things keep escaping his mind that should be important. He'd almost forgotten to do a major project for school last week, getting only an hour of sleep as he'd stayed up all night working on it with Kurt's help.
He just needs to take a break or something. A few days to get his head on straight. He needs to figure out what's going on.
And soon.
.
.
The two of them lie curled up on the floor of the living room, the movie onscreen forgotten.
Kurt has his head close to Blaine's chest, his finger tracing the V-neck of Blaine's T-shirt. Blaine shivers despite himself. Kurt presses his palm down gently on the left side of his chest.
He looks up at him, his green-gray-blue eyes sparkling in the dim light.
"Your heart is beating fast," he remarks.
Blaine smiles, murmuring, "Yeah."
"You look thoughtful," Kurt continues. "What are you thinking about?"
Blaine sighs as Kurt runs his hand slowly down his abdomen, stopping at his waist. "A lot of things."
"Are you worried about your audition?" he asks.
"Nah, I blew it. I know I didn't get the part," Blaine says sadly, looking down at Kurt as he pulls their bodies closer together.
"Don't doubt yourself," Kurt says, rubbing Blaine's upper arm, leaning up to kiss him quickly.
"I'm not," Blaine says, his voice a bit shaky. "I just couldn't focus during it."
Kurt tucks his head into Blaine's neck, kissing his jaw line.
"Kind of like right now," Blaine breathes, his eyelids fluttering.
Kurt laughs, his breath tickling Blaine's warm skin.
"I think we should take this upstairs," Kurt mumbles.
"Agreed."
.
.
Kurt watches him, his eyes wide, eyebrows dipped. His hands are folded together nervously. Blaine sets his cell phone down on the coffee table.
"Sorry about that," he says, looking up at Kurt. "Rachel felt the need to have a long, pointless chat after telling me the cast list."
"Well?" Kurt asks, practically jumping up and down in anticipation.
"I didn't get it," Blaine says sadly, pressing his lips together in a disappointed smile.
Kurt's face falls immediately and he sits down next to Blaine on the couch. He rubs his back as Blaine looks down at a stack of magazines on the table.
"I'm sorry, honey," he says.
"It's fine," Blaine assures, straightening up. "It was just one audition. There's plenty more in the future."
Kurt grabs his waist, kissing him gently on the cheek. "That's the spirit. And I'm going to make this up to you."
"Make this up to me?" Blaine asks uncertainly.
Kurt turns to face him excitedly, clapping his hands together. "Let's go on a date," he says, grinning widely. "We haven't gone on one in months- it'll be fun."
Blaine hesitates for only a moment. "Okay," he agrees, smiling.
.
.
On Friday, Blaine returns home from after work- a café a few blocks away where he sings as their live entertainment- lugging his guitar case into the apartment, and Kurt practically drags him inside.
"Kurt? Kurt!" Blaine says loudly, the sleeve of his jacket clutched tightly in his boyfriend's hands. "What are you-?"
Kurt stops in the middle of the living room, and Blaine almost tumbles over. Kurt grabs the guitar case from his fingers, a wide smile forming on his lips. "Go get dressed," he says slyly. "Something nice. We're going out to dinner."
Blaine peers at him curiously, crossing his arms over his chest and narrowing his eyes. "Why are you so excited?"
Kurt huffs and grabs Blaine's shoulders, ushering him down the hall and to their bedroom. "Because we're going on a date. Our first one in months."
"Yeah, first one out," Blaine says. "But we have little dates at home all the time." He tries to glance back at Kurt. "Is there something else?"
Kurt shoves him through the doorway unceremoniously, biting his lip. "Just get dressed."
"But-"
Kurt shuts the door on him, smirking as it closes.
"Kurt!"
Nothing.
Blaine huffs, turning to their closet. "You're lucky I love you," he mumbles under his breath and hears a small laugh from the hallway.
Blaine shakes his head, half irritated, half thinking how adorable Kurt is. He opens the door to their regretfully small closet, eyes scanning over his limited amount of clothes. In the end, he decides on a pair of dark wash jeans, a green and blue argyle sweater over a button-shirt, and a black blazer. And there should be a pair of dress shoes in the front closet that aren't too scuffed up.
Straightening his collar, he goes out to the living room, peeking around for Kurt. He's sitting on the couch, examining a stack of papers.
"Is this okay?" Blaine asks as he turns to look at him.
Kurt smiles again, his beautiful eyes glittering. He jumps up lightly from the couch, practically skipping over to him. He runs his hands over the collar and chest of the blazer, smoothing it down. "You look perfect."
He examines his whole outfit one more time then looks at his face. He cocks his head, almost looking confused. "Just one thing," he murmurs, reaching up to run a hand through Blaine's curly locks. "You should slick this back."
"Ugh. Do I really?" Blaine whines, sounding like a little kid, and Kurt resists the urge to laugh.
Blaine hasn't slicked his hair back in a long time, since a little over a year into their relationship when he really started to feel comfortable about himself. (And Kurt had told him he preferred the curls). He's gotten used to life without the gel.
"Just trust me," Kurt says. Blaine turns around, letting out a loud, overly dramatic sigh, and Kurt holds back another giggle. "But not too much," he calls after him. "Just enough to tame the madness."
"I got it, I got it," Blaine says dryly.
He smoothes the product into his hair, wondering what the hell Kurt's got planned.
They end up going to a very quiet, formal restaurant, alive and sparkling. Kurt parks their rundown car on the side of the street.
"What are we doing here?" Blaine asks, his eyes widening as he looks back at Kurt. "Can we even afford this?"
"Relax, Blaine," Kurt shrugs it off. He unbuckles his seatbelt, opening his car door. "I've got money saved up."
Blaine just stares after him for a moment, amazed and lovestruck. And slowly, he gets out of the car, putting his arm around Kurt's waist as they enter. Kurt scoots up to the hostess, gives her his name, and she drags them to a small booth at the back of the restaurant, a forced smile on her face.
They sit across from each other, knees touching under the table and as they take their menus, Blaine looks at Kurt, a soft expression on his face.
"You didn't have to do this, you know," he says.
Kurt smirks over the top of his menu. "Oh, believe me, yes I did."
"You're amazing," Blaine says quietly, reaching out to grip Kurt's hand tightly.
Kurt laughs, taking a sip of his water. "I know."
Blaine lets out a small sigh, content and peaceful, turning to his own menu. He doesn't even know if he can eat. Butterflies are darting around in his stomach though he doesn't have any idea why.
They order, and as they wait, they talk and laugh and joke around, and Blaine realizes just how much he's missed this. Just being out, breathing air other than stuffy air of their apartment, relaxing and having fun- the two of them.
Blaine stares into Kurt's eyes, taking in the sea-like quality of them. He looks at his smile, the curve of his ruby lips. He looks at the little dimples that dot his flushed cheeks. He looks at his perfect hair- slicked up and back off his forehead like always. And he bites his lip, nervous by all these sudden emotions that overcome him lately whenever he's with Kurt.
He knows he's in love, he has been, so what's the new desire that's haunting him?
.
.
Blaine finishes his last bite of pasta and pushes his plate away, wiping at his mouth to make sure nothing is left on his face.
And it's when he's sipping water that someone shows up their table.
And it's a wonder he didn't do a spit take because Greg Thorson is standing right in front of him. The Greg Thorson who's just been featured in the New York Times as one of the hottest new music producers in the country.
Blaine lowers his glass, coughing roughly into his elbow.
"Sorry," he mutters. "Um.. I just.. " He looks nervously to Kurt.
Greg holds out his hand. "Hello, Blaine. Kurt invited me here to speak with you tonight. I hope you don't mind me crashing your date." He has a thick British accent, and is dressed in a gray suit. He's young, in his early thirties, his brown hair close-cropped and shiny, the faintest hint of stubble across his face.
"Uh.. no, not at all," Blaine stutters, shaking the man's hand. "It's- it's an honor to meet you."
Greg laughs easily, pulling up a chair from another table and sitting down. "I could say the same. I've been watching you play in that café ever since Kurt contacted me with a video of one of your performances."
Blaine's mouth is agape and he shuts it quickly. "Wow, um.. " he lets out a shaky laugh. "I don't know what to say."
"You don't have to say anything," Greg says, looking seriously at Blaine. "I'm just here to give you an offer."
Blaine nods, taking a deep, shaky breath.
"Our studio is looking for new musicians, and I think you could have a real shot at making it big. Now, other producers are rounding up people they can find and this is going to be a bit of a competition, but with me as your producer, and you're talent, I think you'd be a shoe-in." Greg cracks a smile, holding his hands out in a "what do you think?" gesture.
"I- " Blaine starts, but stops, shaking his head.
"Will you do it?" Greg asks.
"Uh- yeah," Blaine breathes. "Let- let me get you in touch with my agent." He pulls the pen from his check book, grabbing a napkin and writing out a cell phone number. Handing it to Greg, he says. "That's his number, I'm sure he'll be more than happy to receive a call from you."
Greg laughs, pocketing the napkin. "I would hope so. I'll keep in touch, Blaine." He takes something from his breast pocket: a business card. "Here's my number for you. Rest up and stay healthy. I want to get you in the studio as soon as possible." He gets up, puts his chair back and nods them goodbye.
Blaine clutches the business card to his chest, trying to catch his breath. His heart is racing, his pulse too fast for normal.
As soon as he can breathe properly, he looks to Kurt. "You did this?" he asks.
Kurt holds in a huge grin, nodding.
Blaine leans over the table to kiss him passionately. As he pulls away, Kurt mumbles, "I should do stuff like this more often."
"How did you even arrange this?" Blaine asks incredulously.
"You know when Chase was over the other day?" Blaine nods. "And you left to use the bathroom, I had this idea in my head and I asked him and it turns out his uncle works for Greg. I e-mailed him an old Warblers number and he loved it."
Blaine lets out something between a sob and laugh, a tear flowing down his cheek. He looks up at Kurt again, whispering, "I love you."
.
.
Blaine's agent, Randy calls him the next day, informing him that they've already scheduled a recording session and that he'll need an original song to demo. Luckily, Blaine's been filling a notebook full of ideas for years and has plenty of ideas ready to be tested out.
The session takes a full day, and Kurt stays with him the whole time
They arrive early in the morning, around seven-thirty. Greg sets him up for sound check, making sure everything is in place and running fine.
Greg gives him the sign, and Blaine pulls the earphones over his head, hoisting his guitar on his lap while he balances on a stool.
As he strums the first few chords, a sudden spate of nerves overcomes him. It's like a wave crashing down on him, bathing him in reality. He's in a recording studio right now. He's recording a song. A song that could potentially win him a recording contract. A song that could potentially be his first single. A song that could potentially be played on the radio. A song that could jump start his career.
He swallows hard and plows on, giving it his all.
He closes his eyes as he belts out the lyrics, strumming away. Looking at any one of the three men in the other room- Greg, Randy, Kurt- would send him into a horrible case of stage fright and he can't afford that right now. So he lets the blank background of his imagination take him away.
When it's over, he's shaking all over and he's completely breathless.
He opens his to find Kurt looking shocked/impressed/turned on, and as he sees Randy's proud face and Greg's one of triumph, he knows he's done good.
.
.
Blaine sits out on the small deck, a notebook open on his lap as he writes feverishly. His guitar is sitting right next to him, waiting to be strummed. Inspiration won't stop assaulting him and it's safe to say that he's been writing for hours now.
It's Kurt.
Everything's Kurt lately.
Because he just cannot keep his mind off of him. Every time he tries, he fails.
His heart swells every time he simply sees him. An ache has settled in it, and an almost empty feeling resides in his stomach. It's not bad, per se, but it's definitely strange. It almost feels like there's something missing in their relationship, but he can't figure out what it is.
.
.
It's Saturday, and Kurt has invited his old roommate, Chase, over to watch movies.
Kurt's left to the kitchen for snacks, and Chase is staring at him.
"What?" Blaine asks, a little creeped out.
"You seem really distracted," Chase says, staring at him quizzically.
"So?" Blaine asks, trying to keep his voice steady.
"I see the way you look at Kurt lately," Chase continues, lowering his voice. "Something is definitely up with you two. What's going on?"
Shit, is all Blaine can think at this moment, because Chase is right. Something is up. Something huge. And Blaine can't bring himself to admit it. He's finally figured out, and he just isn't man enough to say it.
"I- " he starts but cuts himself off and sighs.
"You can tell me, Blaine," Chase says. "I won't say anything."
Blaine closes his eyes, digging his palm into them. He looks up tiredly. "Can I really trust you?" he asks quietly.
Chase nods, his eyes full of nothing but sincerity. Blaine takes a deep breath, now or never, and he says it.
"I want to marry him."
Blaine doesn't know what to think when Chase simply looks confused. His heart starts to break because dammnit, he knows he shouldn't be thinking this, but he is. Kurt is everything he's ever wanted and he just wants to be with him forever, laughing, joking, hugging, kissing, sleeping, just living life together.
"Blaine, that's- " Chase starts, but his tone says it all and Blaine cuts him off.
"Sudden? Crazy? Unlikely?" he supplies. "Yeah, I know. But, Chase, it's true. I love him so much. I've loved him since the day I met him back in junior year. We've been together for six years and- and I'm not saying we have to get married right this second. I just- " his voice is quiet once again, "I want to spend the rest of my life with him."
"Blaine, just think about what you're saying for a minute," Chase says, looking at him seriously. "You guys are still in college-"
"Senior year," Blaine points out defiantly.
Chase sighs. "Yes, but Kurt's starting a full internship this summer, and you're trying to get that recording deal. Do you think adding a proposal to all this is a good idea?"
Blaine takes a deep breath, looking at his feet and folding his hands together. "I don't know," he finally says. "I mean, we're already living together, but I just, I want to know that this will be permanent. I want- I want to be able to call him Mr. Hummel-Anderson, and I want him to do the same to me. And I want to be able to introduce him to people as my husband, and I- I . . . I'm even ready to start thinking about kids, Chase. I know we're young, but this- this is what I want."
He's breathing a little fast now as Chase stares at him, a thoughtful look on his face. It's silent for a few minutes, and Blaine doesn't have the heart to break it.
"You're planning things too fast," Chase finally says. "I know it's been six years of dating, but you two are just starting your lives. Wait until you're settled with solid jobs and a nice house to propose."
"But, Chase," Blaine argues, starting to sound impatient. "We don't have to get married now. I just want him to know how I feel. This has been eating me alive."
Chase is quiet once again, thinking hard as he stares at his folded palms in his lap. Blaine waits for him to look up. "Well, if that's what you want, I guess I can't stop you."
And he smiles.
Blaine smiles back, but he's even more unsure than he was before.
.
.
The days stretch on, and the more Blaine is with Kurt, the more his heart aches.
More than anything, more than getting that record deal, more than making it on Broadway, more than anything in the world, he just wishes he could get down on one knee.
Kurt doesn't suspect it, he can tell. Kurt goes through the days like normal, hardly suspecting a thing, while Blaine does his best to keep calm. This whole- whole war raging inside him is lost to Kurt. He really isn't sure how Kurt can miss it, because he sure as hell can't keep it off his mind.
Every time he simply thinks Kurt's name, a little thrill of adrenaline goes through him as a flood of possibilities rain down on him. He can't keep all this bottled up anymore or it may explode out of him.
But he keeps thinking, What if Chase is right?
What if proposing would be the worst possible idea right now? What if it caused more trouble than it was worth? What if it diminished their relationship instead of strengthening it? What if Kurt said no?
It would crush Blaine.
If he could just make up his mind.
.
.
It had been a long night of writing songs, and now it's Saturday morning. Somehow, he'd gotten inside, because he was now lying on the couch, a warm, woolen blanket draped over him, a soft feather pillow under his head.
He looks around the blurry room and feels his face; his glasses are off.
Pushing himself up, he turns towards the coffee table, snatching his glasses and putting them on, being careful not to poke himself in the eye. Yawning, he glances at the clock. It's almost eleven. Kurt's up no doubt, and since it's Saturday, he should be home.
"Kurt?" he calls out, listening for a reply.
Kurt pokes his head around the corner from the hallway. "Hey," he says, grinning and walking forward. "Finally woken up, have you?"
Blaine smirks sheepishly. "Did you carry me in here?" he asks, sounding stunned.
"Yup," Kurt says, sitting down at his feet. "You may be short, but you're bulkier than I thought."
Blaine laughs. "I can't believe I fell asleep out there."
"I know," Kurt agrees. "It was freezing. I was totally convinced you would get sick."
"Well, I'm fine," Blaine says, shrugging.
"I'm glad," Kurt says, leaning forward to kiss his forehead. "And don't worry, I saved your guitar and notebook too."
"God, you're the best boyfriend ever," Blaine says quietly.
Kurt laughs. "That I am."
Before Blaine can reply, a vibrating sound issues from the coffee table; it's his BlackBerry. "And my phone," he mutters under his breath. He picks it up, pressing the green key as he shoves it too his ear. "Hello?"
"Hello, Blaine, this is Greg."
Instantly, he's wide awake, jumping from the couch. "Oh, hello, Greg."
He takes the conversation into the hallway, Kurt looking anxiously after him. It's a matter of agonizing minutes before he returns, completely emotionless. Kurt waits patiently until he yells, "I'm in!"
He laughs and rushes forward into Kurt's arms.
"They liked me the best; I'm making a full studio album!"
"Oh my God," Kurt says, kissing his forehead. "Oh, Blaine I knew you could do it."
And that's when Blaine makes his decision. When he's ready, he's going to propose.
.
.
It takes days, it takes weeks, it takes over a month, but Blaine is ready.
Chase may still not like the idea, but he's ready.
He calls Mercedes, knowing that Rachel would blab (she already suspects something and badgers him every day at school), asking for her opinion.
"Blaine?" she asks in surprise as she answers her phone.
"H- hey, Mercedes," he says.
"What's up?" she asks. "How are things for you and Kurt?"
"I have something important to talk about, Mercedes," Blaine says jumping right into it. Despite the fact that Kurt still has an hour left of school, he looks around the apartment, checking just in case.
"What's wrong, baby?" she asks.
"I- " he swallows hard. "I want to propose."
The line is silent, and Blaine can hear and feel his heart pounding.
"Are you sure, Blaine?" Mercedes asks. "I mean this is big. And you two are still so young."
Blaine nods even though she can't see him. "I'm sure. I really want this, Mercedes. I love him so much." His voice goes shaky at the end.
"Well," Mercedes sighs. "I think you should do it then."
Blaine let's out a small, nervous laugh. "Okay. Will you help me plan?"
Mercedes chuckles. "Of course, hon."
.
.
With the help of Mercedes, Blaine has planned out the perfect evening, to be finished off with his proposal. The weekend has just begun, and people from New Directions are arriving in their small apartment, and Blaine has never seen his boyfriend (hopefully-soon-to-be-fiancée) look more happy.
Mercedes, Rachel, Finn, Quinn, Wes, David, Sam, Chase and even Puck are there, laughing and joking and catching up in their living room, handling their alcohol carefully.
Karaoke breaks out almost right away, and Blaine laughs along as Finn and Puck do a flirty duet even though his mind is anywhere but there.
"How you holding up?"
Blaine jumps, slopping a little of his drink in his lap. Mercedes laugh as he tries to hopelessly mop it up.
He sighs. "I'm doing fine right now. I'm just waiting until everything dies down and hopefully I'll be brave enough to do it."
"You'll do fine, sweetie," Mercedes assures, kissing him on the cheek, and he offers her a sheepish grin.
"God, I hope so."
The night seems to drag on, feeling more like a year or two, but he allows Kurt to have fun, to hang out with his their friends. He pushes his feelings of panic, eagerness, and anxiety back, waiting and watching, desperately wishing not to screw this up.
As the night starts drawing to a close, he stops eating and drink, starting to feel nauseous. He can't afford to break down right now so he keeps glancing at Mercedes, at Rachel, at Finn and they give him reassuring smiles.
He can do this.
Things are starting to calm around him, but inside, he's going crazy. Blaine excuses himself to the bathroom where he splashes water on his face, taking deep breaths, trying not to throw up.
When he returns, everyone can tell; they know the time has come.
Kurt is chatting happily with Mercedes on the other side of the room, telling her all about his experiences at the internship.
Blaine approaches him, butterflies like he's never felt darting around in his stomach.
He clears his throat. "Kurt?" he asks.
Kurt looks up, smiling. "Oh, Blaine," he says, standing up and kissing him. "I've hardly seen you tonight."
Blaine laughs nervously. "I know." He takes Kurt's hand, entwining their fingers. "Come with me."
He takes a giggling Kurt out onto their small balcony, the place of so many muses and inspirations of him.
"Is there something you want?" Kurt asks uncertainly.
Blaine smiles. "Just a moment alone with you."
He pulls him over to the railing, and they stare at the stars and the moon for awhile. Luckily, they live in a small suburb of the Big Apple, and they can actually see them.
Kurt rests his head on Blaine's shoulder, sighing. "That's really a beautiful sight."
"Isn't it?" Blaine agrees. "I come out here and just look at them when I try to write songs. They help me to piece together all the inspiration I get from you."
Kurt giggles again, blushing, and Blaine kisses his ear.
They're silent for a few more minutes, and when Blaine feels like his heart is about to explode, he finally draws up enough courage.
"Kurt?" he says quietly, almost a whisper.
"Yeah?" Kurt asks dreamily.
"There's something I've been meaning to ask you."
"What is it?"
His breath seems to leave him as he does what he's been dreaming about. He drops to one knee on the cement, digging into the pocket of his jacket and pulling out a small, worn velvet box.
"Kurt," he starts. Already, Kurt has a hand over his mouth, tears leaking down his face as he struggles to breathe properly. "I've loved you for a long time, ever since that amazing, fateful day on the staircase when I turned around and saw your beautiful green, gray, and blue eyes for the first time. In that moment, I swore you were some angel sent to me. We've gone through so much together, you and I. We've struggled through and through, done our best, and here we are now, and I want to take it to the next level." He takes a deep breath. "Kurt Hummel, will you marry me?"
Kurt almost can't get anything out through his tears of joy, but he somehow manages to gasp, "Yes! Yes, Blaine, of course I'll marry you!"
And as Blaine slides on the ring, he starts crying even harder, staring at it. It's a thin gold band, with a simple square diamond embedded in its center- not too entirely girly. "Oh my God, Blaine," he breathes. "Oh my God, is that my mother's engagement ring?"
Blaine nods wordlessly, he too crying. "Your dad gave it to Mercedes to give to me."
Kurt squeaks, throwing his arms around Blaine, crying into his chest. Quickly getting himself under control, he kisses Blaine roughly on the lips, putting as much passion into it as possible. Blaine kisses back, holding Kurt gently against his own body.
They pull away, resting each other's foreheads together.
"I love you," Kurt says, eyes still wet.
Blaine leans back, wiping the tears gently from Kurt's face with a shaky thumb.
"I love you too," he replies softly. "Soon to be, Mr. Hummel-Anderson."
"Awwww."
Both boys' heads snap over to see Rachel, Mercedes, and Quinn gathered in the patio doorway, expressions of admiration on their faces. The guys stand behind them, all wearing sincere smiles.
"I'm guessing that's a 'yes,'" Finn says.
Kurt flashes his left hand at him, the ring glittering.
Finn smiles one of the widest smiles Blaine's ever seen on him, and everyone lets him through as he goes to hug his brother tightly.
"Congratulations, baby bro," he says, pulling back, and ruffling Kurt's hair.
"You know," Kurt says, still grinning. "Usually I'd freak out and try to kill you for messing up my hair, Finn Hudson, but right now I'm to damn happy."
"Well," Blaine says. "I think the party's over now. Kurt and I have some celebrating to do." He winks, and Kurt blushes as a few people groan.
Blaine just laughs.
.
.
Waking up next to Kurt now has a different feel.
They're still pressed together, naked skin on naked skin, heat radiating, but now it feels like it has a deeper meaning, a closer connection, and Blaine loves that.
This morning, it's Blaine who gets up early to cook breakfast, and it comes out fairly decent if he does say so himself. Kurt arrives in the kitchen his hair all mussed up from sleeping, his shirt and pants back on, the ring still sparkling around his finger.
Today, they take it easy, cuddled in each other's arm, reveling in the joy and happiness they feel, and both of them just seem to have their eyes glued on that ring, smirking when they catch each other looking at it.
It takes a while for them to get used to the idea that they're actually getting married, but eventually they accept it.
And over the course of the next few months, they plan together the perfect wedding, Kurt designing the decorations, layout, and food, Blaine doing whatever's left.
.
.
It's been a few months now since the proposal, but Blaine can't hold back tears as his eyes scan over Kurt's first draft of the invitation.
Kurt puts one arm around Blaine's waist, the other hand gripping his shoulder from behind.
July 17th, 2017
A little over a year.