Words said and words unsaid
Pairing: Ohmiya
Rating: PG
Genre: angst, fluff
Summary: Takeuchi Yuko was going to appear as their guest in VIP Limousine and Nino was so excited about it. But circumstances hindered Nino from being the one assigned for that episode. And Ohno takes action.
-=-=-
Words said and words unsaid
Takeuchi Yuko is going to appear as their guest in VIP Limousine…
Takeuchi Yuko is going to appear as their guest in VIP Limousine.
Nino had to repeat it twice before the information sunk in.
“I knew it! She has a new movie and she’s working hard for promotions! It’s so lucky that we were the ones assigned for that episode, Oh-chan!” Nino was immensely thrilled as he broke the news to Ohno.
On his ride home, his train of thought centered on his idol for more than ten years now. He made a list on his mind regarding her dramas and movies that he had watched, the charm points of each of those projects, what other projects and roles would she like to try in the future, and of course Nino would throw in a compliment or two, or even more at that, in between topics. Nino replayed the scenario again and again in his mind, unaware of the smile on his face which the driver saw from the rear-view mirror, regarding it as strange. Amusement reflected on the driver’s expression, he must have thought that Nino was entertaining perverted thoughts in his head.
Nino was in such high spirits that he decided to cook, despite always just eating instant ramen or Chinese restaurant deliveries on regular nights. However, that night was unlike any other night. It was special, because of the exciting news of the day. He decided to cook katsudon. He was humming a random tune as he gathered the ingredients. He was moving around the house in playful skips, depicting the giddiness of a high school girl who was asked on a date by her crush. A fanboy has got to do what a fanboy has got to do. And he was not ashamed of it, not one bit. The whole fandom knows how much he admires Takeuchi Yuko, but to the extent of skipping around the house, Nino was satisfied to keep that secret to himself.
As the sound of oil cooking the katsudon dwindled, he turned off the fire and admired his motivation for all this cooking, which he regarded as troublesome if it were other boring nights. And then he came up with a bright idea.
What if he pushed the staff into making time for a segment wherein he will cook for T-san? Even he was impressed with his intelligence sometimes. Oh, just the thought of it made him blush, with his cheeks now of crimson tinge. He covered his face in embarrassment even though no one was watching him, at least he hoped so.
As he took the first bite of katsudon, the first taste of the product of his cooking with a fusion of giddiness, Nino felt a resistance on his throat. Never mind the taste, he had a hard time swallowing and he was somewhat overcome with an ominous feeling with that. He discovered he had a sore throat and his high spirits were starting to get dampened. He searched around the house for cough and colds medicine and lozenges for prophylactic measures, but to his dismay, he found none. He made a mental note to buy those the next day and to keep a stock just in case. Feeling defeated, and with an empty stomach due to sudden loss of appetite, he chose to submit himself to the reprieve of sleep.
He was woken up at 4AM, febrile and experiencing a fit of cough so dry, he felt that his eyeballs were starting to bulge out with the pressure of it. His eyes were exuding heat but his whole body felt chilly despite the blanket. The contrast of sensations added to his discomfort. Getting up from the bed and getting a glass of water to drink was a tough hurdle, making him fall back on the bed in exhaustion.
He woke up at 7:30AM, just in time to prepare himself for the van that would pick him up at 8. His temperature had normalized, but just when he was about to sigh in relief, he experienced a cough attack. The more he coughed, the more his throat felt itchy, making him cough more. It was a vicious, merciless cycle. Also, the coughs got more and more recurrent to the point that he was irritated and grumpy. All the excitement of the day prior dissolved into nothingness as he nursed himself in his current plight.
“Every freaking five minutes!” he spat in exasperation, referring to his cough.
-=-=-
“You’re sick and we’re short on schedule. You might as well rest, Ninomiya-san. We cannot afford any delay. I’m sorry, I know you’re a huge fan but there are surely other opportunities for you to meet her.” The producer said firmly but apologetically. He was aware that Nino was a huge fan of Takeuchi Yuko. Who doesn’t know, right? But he was more aware that he had a job to fulfill; the show and the shooting must go on.
Nino wanted to rebut, that stifling a cough when necessary was in his area of expertise, that he may magically feel well when the shooting time comes, and even to the extent of being melodramatic such as ‘my sickness will go away the minute I see her’. However, no coherent phrase came out of his mouth, only another bout of cough, the sound of which was like mockery to his ears. The producer shot a look of pity at him, and left.
By the time Nino recovered, he watched as the producer talked to a staff. He had a shrewd idea what the short conversation was about so he tailed the staff until the latter reached his destination. He expertly stalked, trying with all his might to stifle his occasional coughs just in case Staff-san would notice him and advice him to rest. He’d had enough of being told that.
He was amazed at his own stalking skills. More than that, he was amazed at how he can repress his cough all this time, all due to the sheer spite that was building up inside and swallowing his rationality.
After a few minutes, Nino found himself standing outside a studio where they were holding Jun’s photoshoot for a magazine. It depicted him with a cup of coffee on one hand and a book on the other. Much like the usual Jun. The gentle Jun. Beyond the do-S façade that Jun portrays on television is a kind and gentle friend that Nino had always felt grateful to have.
Nino watched as Jun’s eyes lit up with delight as the staff broke the news to him. So Jun would be his substitute, huh? It irked Nino. Oh, how he wanted to wipe that smile off Jun’s face. That was the smile Nino had yesterday, the kind of smile that was supposed to be his even until now if not for his stupid cough and the producer’s stupid decision to deny him the job.
Following the turn of events, Jun and Ohno would be the ones in charge of the VIP limousine episode with Takeuchi Yuko as guest. The sight of the two together does not click, in Nino’s honest opinion. Jun always seemed to be trying to catch Ohno’s attention and Nino sometimes felt sickened by it.
Besides, it is common knowledge that Ohno and Nino make a perfect combination. Ohmiya SK was not branded as epic for no reason.
‘Why did it have to be Jun, anyway? He had already spent a lot of time with her in the shooting of their drama. They even kissed, for crying out loud!’ And Nino had to keep himself from throwing his DS at the television when that scene played months ago.
‘And why did it have to Riida? He’s never motivated during VIP limousine shootings anyway! Arghhh, what a perfect timing to be sick! Just great, really! The number of times we were pushed to work overtime even though we were burning up, back when we were juniors. And wouldn’t the fans be more thrilled to see me with T-san instead of a sleepy Satoshi and an overly polite Jun? They should have considered that!’
Nino entertained his mean thoughts with arms crossed, legs crossed and scrunched up eyebrows.
‘Even though they know how much that means to me! Being with T-san… What a cruel world!’
He tried calling his manager, wishing that he can make wonders, unable to count the number of times he did him favors. Unfortunately, not this time though. At the back of his mind, Nino knew all along that it won’t work. Maybe this was his karma for all the mean things he said and did. Nino was unsure if he believed in karma but he couldn’t think of any other explanation.
By the time he got home, his cell phone rang with the caller ID showing their Leader’s name. Nino hesitated. In his moments of frustration and self-pity, he’d rather not talk to someone who would remind him what he missed, who would just add fuel to the fire.
“Hello? Nino?” Nino was mildly impressed that Ohno didn’t sound sleepy for once. Maybe he should commend him regarding that later. Amidst the static of the phone conversation, however, he was able to clearly hear the faint melody of laughter which he knew so well. One so angelic and so kind, it can lull him to a peaceful rest; the other polite yet genuine. It annoyed Nino that he couldn’t share in that laughter, that he couldn’t be a reason for their laughter. He was vaguely aware of what Ohno was saying; he felt dizzy and there was ringing on his ears. He shook himself back to reality and finally caught what Ohno was saying.
“Don’t forget to eat! Don’t forget to drink your---”
“I know, ok? You’re not my mother! Enough already!” Nino said vehemently. And the moment he said it, he regretted it. But the damage was done. Silence came from the other line and it frightened Nino. He bit his lip, terrified to hear Ohno’s response.
Ohno began in a low-pitched voice, scaring Nino even further, “What’s with that tone? I’m just being concerned, you know? Here I am worrying about you and you use that tone on me… What, you don’t want to talk to me? Fine! I’ll hang up now.”
And he did hung up, and Nino was left staring at his lonely cell phone. The low tone of Ohno’s voice reverberated in Nino’s ears, like a symphony filled with horror. Even after a few minutes, he felt he could still hear it, much like a schizophrenic hallucination.
He knew he should feel guilty and sad, but he just felt emptiness, nothing more.
He knew he should apologize, a persistent voice in his head was yelling that it was the right thing to do. But somehow, he knew it was already too late to do so.
Mysterious, isn’t it? When we accidentally bump into someone, we automatically say “Sorry”, like a reflex response, even though it was not on purpose and the other person was in no way hurt.
Yet, when it comes to hurting the ones closest to us with our thoughtless words and actions, the tougher it is to say that one simple word, which can magically make things better and the mood lighter. It may be in the tip of our tongues yet something is hindering us from saying it. Is it pride? Is it stubbornness? Is it the hope that even though we don’t say it, the other person would understand? And is that asking too much?
Oh, the innocence and sincerity of childhood, where has it gone?
After Nino had calmed down and reflected on the events of the day, he found himself being overcome with shame for his mean thoughts and actions. He had let himself be swallowed by the green monster of jealousy without even putting up a fight against it.
In the end, no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t bring himself to hate Jun because the man was clueless that Nino should have been in his position. If he had known, Jun would surely give it up and make Nino do it instead, bearing in mind how the latter simply adores the actress. Jun was gentle like that, and Nino knew it. All the more that he can’t hate Jun. No, it was the tragic, misfortunate turn of events that he hated.
Despite all his fans who admire him and regard him as perfect, despite his friends and acquaintances who dote on him, Nino actually hated himself for having the tendency to say things that are better left unsaid, and for not being able to say the words that actually matter.
With the pale moonlight illuminating his desolate room, he rolled into a ball on his bed. For once, he didn’t have the drive to play video games, even for the purpose of getting his mind back on track.
Nothing seemed interesting at the moment and he felt like an empty shell as he felt something warm uncontrollably rolled along his cheek.
His cell phone suddenly lit up, signifying an incoming message.
Nino, having known you for years, despite your loud and talkative image, I know you are not the type of person who openly expresses his feelings or openly apologizes. I just want you to keep in mind that you are not perfect. Along the way, you will get to offend people, knowingly or otherwise. Talking back like that is not a good trait. I know your brattiness belongs to your overall package of charm, and although it is funny at most times, it has the power to hurt people if the timing is not right and if in the wrong context. I know you act confident on the outside but you are battling with yourself regarding this. Yes, maybe it was my fault for being so persistent when I should have just left you alone. I’m sorry.
Please remember that it’s your attitude that I hate, not you. Never will I hate you. Never.
I hope you are feeling well now. How’s your cough?
That did it. The dam restraining Nino’s tears gave up and he sobbed, harder than he did in those dramas that tugged the hearts thousands of people, young and old alike. He used to wonder why people watch those heart-warming dramas and end up crying at a certain scene. What was the point? Why seek the help of television when events in real life can be far more moving, more genuine than fictional events in the lives of nameless strangers.
An old friend told him once that sobbing was catharsis, an act that somehow flushes away the burdens a person is carrying. And now he intended to sob to his heart’s content, until the heaviness on his chest lightened, until the ache on his heart lessened.
His phone rang once again. With blurry vision, he read the message.
Don’t cry too much. We have a photoshoot early tomorrow morning. You wouldn’t want your eyes to be swollen for that.
Nino snorted. Only Ohno Satoshi can read him so well like that. How dare him say that when he was the reason for his tears?
Have you installed hidden cameras in my apartment that I am unaware of?
Nino replied, trying to lighten up the mood, like he usually did.
I just know you too well, Nino.
“That goes without saying,” Nino whispered. He didn’t know how to reply. Ohno had always been so caring and so honest with his feelings. Nino envied that; how he wished he could be as honest as the old man. Then he wouldn’t have to carry this weight in his heart.
A doorbell and a grumbling of his stomach alerted Nino’s senses. He went to the sink to wash his face, to make himself presentable to whoever was visiting him, even though he didn’t want to see anyone at the moment. Except, perhaps, one person.
He found a paper that seemed to have been slipped through the slight gap under his door.
Nino-kun, get well soon! Ohno-kun has been worrying about you during our whole taping; he wasn’t even paying attention to our conversation! (Although I think a spacing out Ohno Satoshi is normal in Arashi’s standards *wink*) Matsumoto-kun did most of the work to cover up for him, though.
Take care of your health! Stop making Ohno-kun worried, ne?
See you soon!
Ja ne!
~ Takeuchi Yuko
Nino couldn’t believe what he was seeing. Was this some sort of hallucination? Or perhaps a prank or a form of mockery from the heavens regarding recent events in his life?
He inspected the neat handwriting and he knew it was really from Takeuchi Yuko, herself. He recognized her handwriting and her signature, being the avid fan that he is.
A knock from the door brought him back to reality that a mysterious letter was sent to him by an unknown person. Who sent it? Who slid that note?
“I brought you cough medicines and some soup that my mother made. You just have to reheat it. Or should I reheat it for you? Are you hungry?” Ohno entered the house unceremoniously just as Nino slightly opened the door.
“Oh-chan…” Nino said loving and almost apologetically, and ready to break down in tears once again.
Nino motioned to pull the other into a tight embrace, but he was forced by nature into another round of cough galore.
Ohno knew he should feel concerned, but considering the context of the hug that was rudely interrupted, he just ended up bursting into a fit of laughter.
Nino pretended to glare at him for laughing at his predicament.
“By the way, Takeuchi-san will be our plus-one guest on the next episode of VS Arashi.” Ohno said matter-of-factly. “Now stop being grumpy and let’s eat this.”
This time, Nino successfully pulled Ohno into a tight hug, a hug so warm, full of gratitude, fondness and unsaid apologies.
“I’m blessed to have known you, Oh-chan.” Nino whispered into the other’s ear.
And Ohno genuinely smiled. Nino can say the perfect words after all.
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AN: I actually cried while writing this.. weird.. >_<
I know I should be studying, but whatever… that can wait.
yumi_usagi I’m sorry! I figured you wanted fluff when you requested for a jealous Nino plot, but I unconsciously veered into writing angst instead. My life has just been angsty lately. I’m sorry! I’ll try to come up with a fluffy story soon, but I just don’t have the inspiration for it now… It ended up pretty crazy; I don’t know if you’ll like it. It didn’t focus too much on a jealous Nino.. L