No Time
Title: No Time
Character(s)/Pairing: Finn, Puck, Finn/Puck
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 1,167
Status: Complete
Notes/Warnings: Day three of Army Boyfriends! As for warnings, be aware of army-related violence involving mentioned character death (neither of the boys) and serious injury.
Summary: They had promised their moms they’d be fine, but you can never make that promise in the army. Trapped in a firefight and nothing’s okay. They just want to go home.
The stupid thing was that they had promised their families that they’d be fine.
“It’s not even that bad anymore.”
“Yeah. Stuff’s calming down. And we’re just mechanics.”
Maybe they had lied. Maybe it had been the calm before the storm, but two months into their deployment and everything went to shit. The stakes were raised. Guys were fucking dying. They were scared.
The attack had happened out of nowhere, but maybe they kind of always did. It’s not like you sit down with the bad guys and coordinate what day is good for an attack. People just...hit. And, here, they hit hard.
They never even had time to be surprised. The explosion had hit, one of their humvees going up in flames and… Puck had really thought they’d freeze. Honestly, he had thought they’d freeze if an attack ever came, both of them too scared to remember that they had guns. That they could fight back.
They didn’t, though. They reacted. They went for their guns the second everything registered and they were out, shooting and defending. Finn pulled one guy out of the line of fire just to realize he was already dead and Puck was pretty sure he saw that last bit of innocence in Finn die. The broken look, because Hector had had two kids that he never stopped talking about. Ángeles gemelas. Twin angels, he’d called them. His twin angels.
He remembered wanting to cry, for Hector, for the girls, and for them. Wanting to cry, because they were barely old enough to vote and they could die out here. The reality hitting him and… God, he wanted his mom.
There wasn’t time to cry, though. Not as Lacey saved his ass and, fuck, the girl was a good shot. She told him to watch his back and, then, he lost sight of her. He lost sight of everyone at some point. Lost sight of Finn and felt his heart drop, because no. He couldn’t lose Finn in this. He couldn’t lose Finn to this.
He shouted Finn’s name as he fired off a shot, trying to find him through the haze of smoke and flying sand. Felt the odd sense of calm and panic at the same time. The calmness that they were trained for this and the worry, because training was a hell of a lot different than actual application.
He pulled the trigger again and nothing happened. His clip was empty and, fuck, he must have miscounted shots in the heat of the moment. He went to switch them out, the empty clip dropping into the sand, and reached for another one, but he stumbled backwards before he could. Felt the flash of pain, followed by another, and he hit the ground.
Ray yelled that they had a man down and it took him a minute to realize they meant him.
He touched a hand to his chest, a lump in his throat when it came back bloody. He didn’t cry, but there was one terrified sob as he tried to move. Tried to get out of the line of fire before something else hit him, but he couldn’t. His body had just...stopped.
An arm went around him, pulling him up and dragging him behind a turned over humvee. Protecting him. Saving him, maybe. If he didn’t bleed out first.
Why couldn’t he remember where the vital stuff was?
Was he dying?
He didn’t want to die.
“Dude, look at me.”
Were they talking to him? He couldn’t hear. Not over the gunfire and the shouting and… God. What the hell were they shooting with that it had gotten through his Kevlar? He… Fuck. He knew this. He knew the logistics and the calibers that let it happen. He did. He just… The knowledge wasn’t coming and he stopped trying to figure it out when the pain flared through his body.
“Puck… Noah, please…”
Oh. It was him they were talking to. Him.
Noah.
Finn.
He turned his head a bit, his eyes finding Finn’s face, and it was stupid, but he felt a little safer. Felt safer with Finn there, even if they were in the middle of a damn war. Felt safer with the guy that he had never called his boyfriend, but he had kind of turned into it since that kiss last year. They had never talked about it. Never talked about them or about the feelings they both knew were there. Maybe they’d been scared. Maybe they’d been scared to even think of a commitment when they knew the risks of their jobs.
Maybe they’d just been cowards.
“Noah, talk to me. You gotta talk to me. Just… Just stay awake…”
Finn only ever called him Noah when he was scared.
Maybe Finn remembered where the vital spots were.
“Finn…” It came out too soft, but Finn must have heard it, because this weird smile split across his face, cutting through the grime and the blood splatter that he hoped wasn’t Finn’s.
“Hi…”
“I wanna go home,” he said, his words choked and he wasn’t sure if it was because he kind of wanted to cry or because he was having trouble breathing.
“I know. We will. I promise.”
They both knew Finn couldn’t promise that, just as much as they knew that this moment was too soft for this setting. Their friends were fighting--dying--and they were having a moment. It would be sweet if it were a movie and he wasn’t bleeding out, but it wasn’t and he was.
Him and Finn huddled behind a humvee wasn’t romantic. It wasn’t sweet that he had two bullets in him or that Finn had one arm lying uselessly at his side. It wasn’t sweet that Finn was using his good arm to try and slow the bleeding when he should have been holding his gun. It wasn’t sweet that the first time he said I love you, he was saying it because he didn’t know if he’d get to say it later. It wasn’t sweet that Finn teared up and begged him not to say it now.
“Tell me when we’re home,” he said, his lips pressed to Puck’s forehead. “Say it as much as you want when we’re home. Not here…”
Neither of them wanted to say that the only home he might get was in a box.
“Just stay with me…”
He tried. Really, he did. He tried so hard to stay awake and stay with Finn, but something kept pulling him under. Blinks went too long. His body kept begging him to give in as much as Finn begged him to stay awake. They both know he was fighting a losing battle and he didn’t have it in him to turn his head away when Finn kissed him. Like Finn didn’t care that he’d been coughing up blood.
Maybe he didn’t.
Maybe this was goodbye.
This was the first time he’d been cold since they landed in Iraq.
The End
Character(s)/Pairing: Finn, Puck, Finn/Puck
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 1,167
Status: Complete
Notes/Warnings: Day three of Army Boyfriends! As for warnings, be aware of army-related violence involving mentioned character death (neither of the boys) and serious injury.
Summary: They had promised their moms they’d be fine, but you can never make that promise in the army. Trapped in a firefight and nothing’s okay. They just want to go home.
The stupid thing was that they had promised their families that they’d be fine.
“It’s not even that bad anymore.”
“Yeah. Stuff’s calming down. And we’re just mechanics.”
Maybe they had lied. Maybe it had been the calm before the storm, but two months into their deployment and everything went to shit. The stakes were raised. Guys were fucking dying. They were scared.
The attack had happened out of nowhere, but maybe they kind of always did. It’s not like you sit down with the bad guys and coordinate what day is good for an attack. People just...hit. And, here, they hit hard.
They never even had time to be surprised. The explosion had hit, one of their humvees going up in flames and… Puck had really thought they’d freeze. Honestly, he had thought they’d freeze if an attack ever came, both of them too scared to remember that they had guns. That they could fight back.
They didn’t, though. They reacted. They went for their guns the second everything registered and they were out, shooting and defending. Finn pulled one guy out of the line of fire just to realize he was already dead and Puck was pretty sure he saw that last bit of innocence in Finn die. The broken look, because Hector had had two kids that he never stopped talking about. Ángeles gemelas. Twin angels, he’d called them. His twin angels.
He remembered wanting to cry, for Hector, for the girls, and for them. Wanting to cry, because they were barely old enough to vote and they could die out here. The reality hitting him and… God, he wanted his mom.
There wasn’t time to cry, though. Not as Lacey saved his ass and, fuck, the girl was a good shot. She told him to watch his back and, then, he lost sight of her. He lost sight of everyone at some point. Lost sight of Finn and felt his heart drop, because no. He couldn’t lose Finn in this. He couldn’t lose Finn to this.
He shouted Finn’s name as he fired off a shot, trying to find him through the haze of smoke and flying sand. Felt the odd sense of calm and panic at the same time. The calmness that they were trained for this and the worry, because training was a hell of a lot different than actual application.
He pulled the trigger again and nothing happened. His clip was empty and, fuck, he must have miscounted shots in the heat of the moment. He went to switch them out, the empty clip dropping into the sand, and reached for another one, but he stumbled backwards before he could. Felt the flash of pain, followed by another, and he hit the ground.
Ray yelled that they had a man down and it took him a minute to realize they meant him.
He touched a hand to his chest, a lump in his throat when it came back bloody. He didn’t cry, but there was one terrified sob as he tried to move. Tried to get out of the line of fire before something else hit him, but he couldn’t. His body had just...stopped.
An arm went around him, pulling him up and dragging him behind a turned over humvee. Protecting him. Saving him, maybe. If he didn’t bleed out first.
Why couldn’t he remember where the vital stuff was?
Was he dying?
He didn’t want to die.
“Dude, look at me.”
Were they talking to him? He couldn’t hear. Not over the gunfire and the shouting and… God. What the hell were they shooting with that it had gotten through his Kevlar? He… Fuck. He knew this. He knew the logistics and the calibers that let it happen. He did. He just… The knowledge wasn’t coming and he stopped trying to figure it out when the pain flared through his body.
“Puck… Noah, please…”
Oh. It was him they were talking to. Him.
Noah.
Finn.
He turned his head a bit, his eyes finding Finn’s face, and it was stupid, but he felt a little safer. Felt safer with Finn there, even if they were in the middle of a damn war. Felt safer with the guy that he had never called his boyfriend, but he had kind of turned into it since that kiss last year. They had never talked about it. Never talked about them or about the feelings they both knew were there. Maybe they’d been scared. Maybe they’d been scared to even think of a commitment when they knew the risks of their jobs.
Maybe they’d just been cowards.
“Noah, talk to me. You gotta talk to me. Just… Just stay awake…”
Finn only ever called him Noah when he was scared.
Maybe Finn remembered where the vital spots were.
“Finn…” It came out too soft, but Finn must have heard it, because this weird smile split across his face, cutting through the grime and the blood splatter that he hoped wasn’t Finn’s.
“Hi…”
“I wanna go home,” he said, his words choked and he wasn’t sure if it was because he kind of wanted to cry or because he was having trouble breathing.
“I know. We will. I promise.”
They both knew Finn couldn’t promise that, just as much as they knew that this moment was too soft for this setting. Their friends were fighting--dying--and they were having a moment. It would be sweet if it were a movie and he wasn’t bleeding out, but it wasn’t and he was.
Him and Finn huddled behind a humvee wasn’t romantic. It wasn’t sweet that he had two bullets in him or that Finn had one arm lying uselessly at his side. It wasn’t sweet that Finn was using his good arm to try and slow the bleeding when he should have been holding his gun. It wasn’t sweet that the first time he said I love you, he was saying it because he didn’t know if he’d get to say it later. It wasn’t sweet that Finn teared up and begged him not to say it now.
“Tell me when we’re home,” he said, his lips pressed to Puck’s forehead. “Say it as much as you want when we’re home. Not here…”
Neither of them wanted to say that the only home he might get was in a box.
“Just stay with me…”
He tried. Really, he did. He tried so hard to stay awake and stay with Finn, but something kept pulling him under. Blinks went too long. His body kept begging him to give in as much as Finn begged him to stay awake. They both know he was fighting a losing battle and he didn’t have it in him to turn his head away when Finn kissed him. Like Finn didn’t care that he’d been coughing up blood.
Maybe he didn’t.
Maybe this was goodbye.
This was the first time he’d been cold since they landed in Iraq.
The End