(no subject)
My life just seems like it is falling apart at the seams. I feel odd and misplaced in my life like I'm not the one who should be here, not the one experiencing things that are happening. I guess life is just kind of rough right now for me. It's hard for me to walk around and see almost everyone I know with someone else they can share their lives with and I am all alone. I wish I just had someone close to me that I could tell everything to and they'd hug and kiss me and tell me everything is going ot be ok. Not even really fix anything just tell me that it will be ok. Argh I dunno I just feel more alone right now then I have in a long long time. Being short on money sucks. and being so short that I have to borrow from people and end up oweing is bad. I ned to get over my fear of leaving my comfortable job and put myself out there. I have enough experience and I know I would get hired it's just leaving my safe bubble for something uncertain that scares the living shit out of me. I like to have everything set in place for me and I just have to fill in the spaces, but alas as I get older and life goes on I guess I am starting to realize that things won't be like that and the way they were. I need to meet new people. Get out of my cocoon and experience life before it passes me right on by I've already wasted too much of it. I mean I'm already 21 and look at all the experiences that I should have had by now that have passed me by because I was too afraid to reach out and grab them. I dunno what I am saying I guess I just had to get that out of my system and let it be known that I am really am not happy right now and haven't been for awhile. Anyone who it seems like I have been avoiding or grumpy to I am sorry it's not meant to be like that. Anyways work tomorrow ad it's an actual full shift I can't believe it!!! Not much else really going on right now. guess I will update somemore if I find anything to type about.