a happiness hangover
i swear i can't stop writing in my live journal. i guess i just have a lot to say and i hate writing with pens on paper and having my mom find it. i like having my friends read it. i guess i am a loser, well why not... for what i here being a loser is fun.
my dad told me this morning that i have to go to the cast party tonight. that i need to have fun. lately fun has been optional for me. high school is becoming serious, i actually have decided my major and what college i am going to already (well three choices). i think i maybe turning into a serious adult type person. i make a big deal out of school and my choices. i guess i realized that i havent made much room for my friends and fun right now. hopefully my party on the 15th of May will clear this mess up. the DJ is going to do my party for super cheap and it will be from like 3pm to 11pm. i have to talk to Lexi about bringing her stuff, make invites (and mark some people that have been fighting with me off my invite list). Roey (my homegirl) wants me to invite Sean Sutherland but i am not sure if he would show up because the only people he would know would be Amanda Abraham, Roey, and Alan Shaw of and me... but i am not quite sure he likes me, let alone remembers me ( he was on my bus at Addams and sat in front of JB and i like everyday).
Looking at my pictures yesterday i did realize how much i really have changed. i mean outside and in. i used to have really short mousy brown hair and wore pink shirts all the time. then i bleached my hair. then i died it back and cut it really short. and now its wavy and shoulder length. i really grew into my body. keeping it tone with yoga, belly breathes, and tennis. i used to like pop only and now i like all music. i used to hate comics because i was named after the thing's girlfriend in fantastic four and now i love comics. i used to have some problem that effected my thoughts. it was like depression but it had a triger and for the longest time i tried to hurt myslef, 8th grade was the worst and then over that summer i promised myself i would change and i did. for the better, i try to be the nicest person i can be. i just hope someday someone will see that and become way spun around.
oh and roey for my birthday i want some death cab for cuite cds please!
much luv