[Ongoing] The Last Promise -Aimiya (8/??)
Title: The Last Promise (8/??)
Author: Ica_90
Beta by: antimiya88 <3 thank you so much
Pairing: [friendship] Aimiya, [one-sided (?)] Sakuraiba, Juntoshi [mentioned in some chapters]
Genre: Friendship, Angst, college-life
Rating: PG-13
Summary: a story revolves around the friendship of the two boys, friendship begins from an unexpected meeting, but none of them knows of how it’ll end.
Disclaimer: the word ‘fiction’ should explain everything. I own the plot, not the real character/human.
I wake up one morning with Aiba sitting on the floor next to my bed. His stare is as empty as if he was already dead and I couldn’t help it but feel afraid; afraid of the possibility to have already given up on his life.
During the whole day, the two of us never had any conversation with each other. He asked for some space to think so I did give him one. But I can’t avoid watching over him: how he stared at the empty ceiling, or at the wall, or even worst, at the bracelet which was his assignment from that jerk. I lost counting of how many times Aiba had sighed that night. By the time I went to bed, he was still there, at his study table, staring endlessly at the empty wall.
And this morning, when he stares at me with that empty look, I know he had it enough. I know he is ready to move on from the man he loves but gets nothing in reply. I feel sorry for him but at the same time, I’m glad. Glad that I will never see him being abused by the man named Sakurai Sho.
“It’s tough,” he begins. I nod a few times
“I know. But it’s worth trying. Trust me”
He pauses. Slowly, his lips curl, forming a smile. It has been a long time since I saw his usual bright and sincere smile.
“I believe you,” he pauses, smiling even more. “But you have to help me”
I frown.
“I will resign. But can you promise me that you’ll always be there if anything happens between us?”
Resign. The word seems to echo in my head.
“Are you…. sure?” I ask to receive a determined nod from him.
“I wanna find my own happiness, Kazu. And I know, in order to do that, I have to keep myself away from him”
For a while, I said nothing. Slowly, I sit on my bed, stretching for a few seconds before move myself completely from the bed. For once, my sight was directed towards Aiba-chan who makes his way to his bed, sitting there observing me. He smiles when he sees me looking at him and mouths an ‘I’m ok’ when he sees a frown on my forehead.
“So what’s your first step?” I ask once I’m done with my clothing. He looks at me, frowning before he opens his mouth to talk.
“You have to follow me. Because I don’t think I can do it alone, without having anyone supporting me” he explained. This time, I frown again.
“Follow you? Where?”
I saw him taking a deep breath.
“To meet him. For one last time. After all, we still have this ‘assignment’ to send him right?”
I bite my lip, slowly nodding. Again, I see him smiling.
“I’m ready Nino. I’m ready whether he’s going to hit me, to punch me or to abuse me with his words. I’m ready for all that. But I know I will surrender again to him if he forces me into that thing again. I know I won’t be strong enough to resist him. And that’s why, I need you to be there,”
I sigh hearing his words. There’s indeed a feeling that he can’t erase him from his heart. It’s hard. It’s tough. I know it. I’ve experienced it before. But I also know he will move on if he tries. And I want him to do that. Not because I want to control him over what he’s going to do, but because I hate seeing him hurt.
Slowly, I make my way towards him, taking a seat next to him on his bed. I pat his shoulder a few times before wrapping my hand over his shoulder. He turns to look at me and that’s when I smile at him.
“It’s ok. You’ll be fine,”
I said it a few times, before he nodded smiling.
***
“You’re joking right?” I heard from outside of the room. It wasn’t a yell, but there was obviously a shock in his tone.
For a moment, nothing came out from anyone’s mouth. Aiba-chan asked me to wait for him outside right after we showed him the bracelet and the last image I have before I left the room was Sakurai-san’s proud smug. If only I didn’t have patience… maybe he had forgotten how his face was once covered by bruises that were my doing.
“I’m not joking, senpai. I’m serious. I’ve been a burden to you, a nuisance to be exact”
“You’re not! You’re-“
“And I know I’m just an idiot for whom you had to bribe the university so that they let me pass at least one paper during my first semester…, just because I wasn’t able to organize my time well, and I’m grateful for that.”
Wait. He did that?! To Aiba-chan? Is that the reason why Aiba-chan stayed? Because he felt indebted to the man?
“Aiba-kun… can we at least… discuss it?”
“I believe we have nothing to discuss. But if you want me to pay back the salaries I worked for, I beg for at least-“
“I DON’T NEED MONEY FROM YOU! NOW SHUT UP AND LET ME TALK!”
I didn’t wait any longer before I open the door to the room, entering it to see the two keep on staring at each other. While Aiba-chan is calm, I could see Sakurai-san face is red, his shoulders moving up and down as I believed he was trying not to burst out his anger.
“Is everything fine here? I thought you told me that you need just a minute?” I said trying to end whatever conversation there was between them at the moment. But my existence seemed to pass unnoticed. I could see Sakurai-san looking at my best friend intently. Aiba-chan has become a great help to him and I’m sure he realized it now and he’s positively gonna ask him to stay.
But if he really does, what should I do next? My friend had it enough and if he stays it will hurt him more. I don’t want that for him.
And then, the fury I saw earlier in the senior, faded. His face softened, his eyes pleading, showing that he was in despair as he walked towards Aiba-chan, begging him to reconsider his decision.
“God, I don’t know what I should say…”
“Don’t say anything then,” Aiba-chan cut him. He was determined. There was no hesitation shown in his voice.
“But if I don’t, you’ll leave,” Sakurai-san replied, his voice revealing his desperation. I don’t understand the reason though”
“I- I- God, just stay. Please. Just, don’t resign. Please, I beg you. I don’t know why, or maybe I know. Just please. I still need you”
Sakurai-san was confused; I could see it by the way he talked, stuttered, stumbled and repeated his words. The smug from earlier was no longer to be seen, instead of that, for the first time since I know him, he looked at me with a pleading look, maybe asking me to persuade my best friend.
I didn’t realize when Sakurai-san took Aiba-chan’s hand into him. But slowly, Aiba-chan pushed the senpai’s hand away from him, staring at the man with an empty stare.
“I’m sorry,” he said, while his gaze avoided meeting Sakurai-san’s. “But I think this is the right time for me to plan a better future for myself”
The words seemed to stab Sakurai-san directly his heart. He flinched a little at the hearing of those words and bitted his lips. That makes me wonder if he already knew that Aiba-chan’s heart was his and he chose to ignore it because he’s a jerk. I couldn’t help but groan out of annoyance. Though, none of my actions got the senior’s attention.
For a while, the room was silent. An awkward silent. I know the senior want to talk more, but nothing could leave his mouth. And Aiba-chan took this as his chance to leave. He apologized once more before heading out of the room, dragging me along. But Sakurai-san managed to catch his hand; grabbing him by his wrist he stopped him before we could step out of the room.
“I’m- I’m sorry,” the senior said, desperate. “But I reject your resignation, Aiba-chan,”
“It’s Aiba-san, Sakurai-san” Aiba-chan snapped. “You often told me to keep the terms between us strictly professional. Aiba-chan is only for those people who know me well. You’re not in that circle. So please don’t call me by that”
Sakurai-san bites his lips.
“Don't mind that. But please. Just don’t resign. I know I made you mad. I know you’re tired of me. But please just don’t. I need you” The man pleads. “Take as much time as you need. You need a break, go ahead. You wanna spend your time with your friend, go. But please just don’t resign. I still need you,”
Aiba-chan chuckled. I wasn’t sure for what reason though. But then he shook his head, pushing the senior’s hand away from his.
“Thank you. I’ll think about it. For now, I need a break,” he replied Sakurai-san coldly. And for once, the ego that Sakurai-san had built broke when he couldn’t find any words to stop the man anymore. Before, Sakurai-san would retort with his anger flaring when someone was rude or simply went against his decision, but today he stands in front of me silent, surrendering to his PA’s words.
Bowing a little, Aiba-chan pulled me to leave the senior alone in the room.
“So cool” I said once we’re a little bit far from the first place. He laughs bitterly.
“I wish I could be that cool since the beginning” he said, chuckling a little while keeping our steps together.
Both of us laugh.
We continued on walking until we reached our room. Not waiting for long, he throws himself to the bed while I close the door behind me.
For a while, none of us says anything. He kept staring at the ceiling with empty eyes, making me wonder what he’s thinking at the moment. Is he hurt? Or is he fine? I don’t know. Somehow that makes me uncomfortable. I don’t help my friend enough. And he went through a lot of things without me being a real helper.
My whole attention went back to him when I heard his sighs. Curious, I asked.
“What’s wrong?”
He shook his head.
“I miss that playground we used to play together in the past”
I laugh.
“What’s with that? Did you suddenly become a nostalgic person?” he laughs before abruptly stop. Slowly, he sits straight before turning his sight directly towards me. His expression is unreadable but I could distinguish a soft smile formed on his lips. Unconsciously, I smile back at him.
“Let’s skip our class for a few days!” he says, winking at me. I eye him curiously. When I finally get the grasp of what he’s trying to say to me, my eyes widen.
“Come on. Your mum won’t be that surprised if I suddenly crash in your home just for the night, will she?”
“No, she won’t. But I’m sure she’s gonna nag me because I didn’t tell her earlier about going back home”
“Then tell her. Come on. It’s not like I always bother you. Please… Nino-chan… for me. pleeeeeasssseeeeee,” he pleads me. I groan.
“What a nuisance,” I replied causing him to chuckle.
***
“You should have told me earlier, Kazu. I haven’t bought all the groceries,” my mum whines a few minutes after we step into the house. Throwing Aiba-chan an annoyed look, I mouth him ‘your fault’. All he does is laughing.
“Please don’t bother me, aunty. We didn’t really plan this ahead. I just miss this neighborhood,” Aiba-chan says, following my mum to the kitchen. “I hope I don’t trouble you,”
“Of course not,” my mum stops whatever she’s doing. Slowly she turns to take a proper look on my best friend. “It has been a long time since you’ve been here, Masaki-kun. It’s not a trouble at all. You used to spend most of your time in this house too. Feel free to do whatever you wanna do. But for now, I need to go to buy the groceries. I’ll cook you something special for today”
“You didn’t cook anything special when I came home, mum. That’s so unfair,” I said, faking a sulking tone, making the silent room filled with laughter.
“You’re just jealous that I have your mum’s extra attention, Nino,” Aiba-chan sticks out his tongue at me and I responded his doing by showing him my fist. Watching the two of us, all my mum could do, was laughing.
“You guys are 20 years old, but you act as if you were 6. Oh god, you guys make me all teary. It feels like yesterday when I saw that picture with Nino wearing your mum’s Chinese dress, Aiba-chan”
I rolled my eyes.
“Seriously mum. That is unnecessary,” I said, making the two of them laugh again. Slowly my lips form a smile.
It was such bliss to hear that hyena-type of laugh after a long time.
***
Having two 20-year-old men sitting on the swing is gross, let alone the childish hide and seek game between the two of us. But I couldn’t care less. I’m happy to watch my best friend laughing over silly things such as how his shoes smeared with mud at the playground, or how I fell down while trying to catch him.
That bright smile was back again. God, how I wish he had made that step year ago.
“Nino, here!” he waves his hand from the other part of the playground, near the small tunnel at the playground. He grins wider as I reach him, pointing at the inside of it.
“Take a look. It’s still there. I couldn’t believe in my eyes when I saw it,” he says, giggling happily.
“What is it?”
“I carved our name there”
“You what?” I went inside the tunnel to see what he mentioned earlier. “Nino & Aiba were here - 20 July 2003” was written there. Somehow my lips form a smile.
“What an idiot!” I said, laughing when I looked at him. The grin on his face never faded though, and there’s a chuckle along all this time.
“It’s still there. I can’t believe it. It has been 11 years, hasn’t it?”
“Yeah. And you had written my name without my permission, Aiba-chan,” he pouts. “But let’s leave another memory here”
Somehow that manages to make him smile. He searches around to find a sharp stone and when he found one, he passes it to me. Last time, it was his handwriting. This time, it is mine. “Aiba Masaki & Ninomiya Kazunari was here, 21st July 2014” was written, and both of us smile of satisfied.
“Let’s go home?” I say, and he replied it with a nod.
***
I could never describe my feelings at the moment. They made my chest so heavy from everything I had inside of me. I felt nostalgic, happy, sad, all mixed as one and it’s somehow confusing me why I’m having all these feelings inside of me; especially the sadness. Shouldn’t this happiness overwhelm the sadness that wasn’t supposed to be there in the first place?
1 am. The room was already dark since hours ago but I couldn’t drive myself to sleep and I’m sure the one lying next to me as well. He was on his one side before he shifts to his other, this time facing me. I could barely see his face because of the darkness of the room. But then I feel his hand roaming to my body, making me instantly slap his hand harshly. He laughs.
“So sensitive” he says chuckling.
I replied jokingly with a laugh. “So stupid” and then we laugh.
But after a while, we stop. The room turns silent once again. The only thing that could be heard was the sound of the clock ticking and the fan.
“I’m still gonna resign from being Sho-san’s assistant. No worries about it,” he says all of sudden. His voice is so clear to my ears that I’m sure he’s still facing me. Slowly, I shift to lie on my side, facing him.
“You know what’s better for you, Aiba-chan. You know you won’t be happy with him,” I said to hear him sigh afterwards.
“I know,” and then he paused. I could see him, due to the light that was coming through the windows in my room, biting his lips. “I’m sure I’m gonna be fine with you around. I’ve decided and there’s no way of turning back, right?”
I left the question unanswered. Just because I don’t know of the right answer. No one knows what future could bring. What if one day, Sakurai-san changed and finally acknowledged my friend’s feelings? Would Aiba-chan change his mind then?
“Ne, Nino-chan,” Aiba-chan calls me all of a sudden after a while of silence. I snort annoyingly.
“I said this from before, Aiba-chan! Stop adding -chan after my nick name!” I poke his waist that made him groan out of hurt.
“What’s wrong with that? You call me Aiba-chan” I could feel he’s pouting while saying those words.
“Nino is enough,” I pause, realizing that the man was giving a hint to change the topic. “What do you wanna talk about?”
I could feel his hand reaching mine. When he found my fingers, he linked our pinky finger.
“Let’s make a promise,”
“Huh?”
“Let’s graduate from the university with flying colours ne? Let’s secure ourselves a better future,”
“Huh? What’s with the sudden words?” I ask, scratching my head with my free hand. But he ignores my words and continues with whatever is on his mind instead.
“I wanna be your best man on your wedding. I already booked the position so you can’t say no” hearing this, I laugh.
“Of course I can. It’s my wedding. If you don’t achieve the standards, I’ll have to reject you!”
“Mou!!! I’m gonna chase you down until you’re in your grave if you don’t let me be your best man!!”
In the darkness, I could feel he’s pouting. I laugh imagining that. And then we fell silent. It’s only a moment later I heard snores from the older man, our pinky finger still linking to each other, I can’t help but chuckle.
“Of course you’ll be my best man, Aiba-chan. You have secured the spot since the first time we met” I said, before falling asleep with his snore as my lullaby.
***
I force myself to open my eyes when I feel the heat from the sunlight through my windows hitting my head. And the moment I open my eyes, Aiba-chan’s face was an inch away from mine. Startle, I jolt backwards.
“Ohayou,” he greets with his usual bright smile.
“You’re too close. Your breath stinks!” I say, pushing him away, making him roll to the other side before rolling back to me. Silly. I can’t help but laugh at him.
"I was wondering,” I raise a questioning eyebrow as I hear his words. “Why didn’t I fall in love with you, when it’s you I met first, before Sho-san?”
I laugh to his question. I didn’t answer it though.
“Seriously. It’s early in the morning. You should start up with a fresh thinking, not some ridiculous things” he laughs, closing the distance between us.
“No seriously. It’s bugging me since yesterday. Why was it? I wonder”
That’s because I don’t give you hope, Aiba-chan. He did. I let this thought inside my mind without voice it out.
I push him harder this time, laughing when he groans of the hard push.
“Seriously, you’re a 21-year-old boy. Your breath stinks. Wake up. I need to fold the futon,” I say as I stand up straight from the futon, ready to tidy up the room. He laughs.
But then, it instantly stops. From the corner of my eyes, I see the taller man hold his chest, clenching his shirt as if he’s suffering from the worst chest pain.
“What’s wrong Aiba-chan?” I ask, rushing towards him to hold him from falling.
“Nothing… I’m fine. Just, my chest pain, but I’m fine…” he says, trying to hide the pain behind a faked smile.
He’s not fine. Just when he started walking, I saw him losing his balanced before falling on the bedroom floor, head first.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
i'm gonna finish this before november.. i need to finish this before november. thank you for those who has been supporting me up till now. trully appreciate it. <3
NEXT
Author: Ica_90
Beta by: antimiya88 <3 thank you so much
Pairing: [friendship] Aimiya, [one-sided (?)] Sakuraiba, Juntoshi [mentioned in some chapters]
Genre: Friendship, Angst, college-life
Rating: PG-13
Summary: a story revolves around the friendship of the two boys, friendship begins from an unexpected meeting, but none of them knows of how it’ll end.
Disclaimer: the word ‘fiction’ should explain everything. I own the plot, not the real character/human.
I wake up one morning with Aiba sitting on the floor next to my bed. His stare is as empty as if he was already dead and I couldn’t help it but feel afraid; afraid of the possibility to have already given up on his life.
During the whole day, the two of us never had any conversation with each other. He asked for some space to think so I did give him one. But I can’t avoid watching over him: how he stared at the empty ceiling, or at the wall, or even worst, at the bracelet which was his assignment from that jerk. I lost counting of how many times Aiba had sighed that night. By the time I went to bed, he was still there, at his study table, staring endlessly at the empty wall.
And this morning, when he stares at me with that empty look, I know he had it enough. I know he is ready to move on from the man he loves but gets nothing in reply. I feel sorry for him but at the same time, I’m glad. Glad that I will never see him being abused by the man named Sakurai Sho.
“It’s tough,” he begins. I nod a few times
“I know. But it’s worth trying. Trust me”
He pauses. Slowly, his lips curl, forming a smile. It has been a long time since I saw his usual bright and sincere smile.
“I believe you,” he pauses, smiling even more. “But you have to help me”
I frown.
“I will resign. But can you promise me that you’ll always be there if anything happens between us?”
Resign. The word seems to echo in my head.
“Are you…. sure?” I ask to receive a determined nod from him.
“I wanna find my own happiness, Kazu. And I know, in order to do that, I have to keep myself away from him”
For a while, I said nothing. Slowly, I sit on my bed, stretching for a few seconds before move myself completely from the bed. For once, my sight was directed towards Aiba-chan who makes his way to his bed, sitting there observing me. He smiles when he sees me looking at him and mouths an ‘I’m ok’ when he sees a frown on my forehead.
“So what’s your first step?” I ask once I’m done with my clothing. He looks at me, frowning before he opens his mouth to talk.
“You have to follow me. Because I don’t think I can do it alone, without having anyone supporting me” he explained. This time, I frown again.
“Follow you? Where?”
I saw him taking a deep breath.
“To meet him. For one last time. After all, we still have this ‘assignment’ to send him right?”
I bite my lip, slowly nodding. Again, I see him smiling.
“I’m ready Nino. I’m ready whether he’s going to hit me, to punch me or to abuse me with his words. I’m ready for all that. But I know I will surrender again to him if he forces me into that thing again. I know I won’t be strong enough to resist him. And that’s why, I need you to be there,”
I sigh hearing his words. There’s indeed a feeling that he can’t erase him from his heart. It’s hard. It’s tough. I know it. I’ve experienced it before. But I also know he will move on if he tries. And I want him to do that. Not because I want to control him over what he’s going to do, but because I hate seeing him hurt.
Slowly, I make my way towards him, taking a seat next to him on his bed. I pat his shoulder a few times before wrapping my hand over his shoulder. He turns to look at me and that’s when I smile at him.
“It’s ok. You’ll be fine,”
I said it a few times, before he nodded smiling.
***
“You’re joking right?” I heard from outside of the room. It wasn’t a yell, but there was obviously a shock in his tone.
For a moment, nothing came out from anyone’s mouth. Aiba-chan asked me to wait for him outside right after we showed him the bracelet and the last image I have before I left the room was Sakurai-san’s proud smug. If only I didn’t have patience… maybe he had forgotten how his face was once covered by bruises that were my doing.
“I’m not joking, senpai. I’m serious. I’ve been a burden to you, a nuisance to be exact”
“You’re not! You’re-“
“And I know I’m just an idiot for whom you had to bribe the university so that they let me pass at least one paper during my first semester…, just because I wasn’t able to organize my time well, and I’m grateful for that.”
Wait. He did that?! To Aiba-chan? Is that the reason why Aiba-chan stayed? Because he felt indebted to the man?
“Aiba-kun… can we at least… discuss it?”
“I believe we have nothing to discuss. But if you want me to pay back the salaries I worked for, I beg for at least-“
“I DON’T NEED MONEY FROM YOU! NOW SHUT UP AND LET ME TALK!”
I didn’t wait any longer before I open the door to the room, entering it to see the two keep on staring at each other. While Aiba-chan is calm, I could see Sakurai-san face is red, his shoulders moving up and down as I believed he was trying not to burst out his anger.
“Is everything fine here? I thought you told me that you need just a minute?” I said trying to end whatever conversation there was between them at the moment. But my existence seemed to pass unnoticed. I could see Sakurai-san looking at my best friend intently. Aiba-chan has become a great help to him and I’m sure he realized it now and he’s positively gonna ask him to stay.
But if he really does, what should I do next? My friend had it enough and if he stays it will hurt him more. I don’t want that for him.
And then, the fury I saw earlier in the senior, faded. His face softened, his eyes pleading, showing that he was in despair as he walked towards Aiba-chan, begging him to reconsider his decision.
“God, I don’t know what I should say…”
“Don’t say anything then,” Aiba-chan cut him. He was determined. There was no hesitation shown in his voice.
“But if I don’t, you’ll leave,” Sakurai-san replied, his voice revealing his desperation. I don’t understand the reason though”
“I- I- God, just stay. Please. Just, don’t resign. Please, I beg you. I don’t know why, or maybe I know. Just please. I still need you”
Sakurai-san was confused; I could see it by the way he talked, stuttered, stumbled and repeated his words. The smug from earlier was no longer to be seen, instead of that, for the first time since I know him, he looked at me with a pleading look, maybe asking me to persuade my best friend.
I didn’t realize when Sakurai-san took Aiba-chan’s hand into him. But slowly, Aiba-chan pushed the senpai’s hand away from him, staring at the man with an empty stare.
“I’m sorry,” he said, while his gaze avoided meeting Sakurai-san’s. “But I think this is the right time for me to plan a better future for myself”
The words seemed to stab Sakurai-san directly his heart. He flinched a little at the hearing of those words and bitted his lips. That makes me wonder if he already knew that Aiba-chan’s heart was his and he chose to ignore it because he’s a jerk. I couldn’t help but groan out of annoyance. Though, none of my actions got the senior’s attention.
For a while, the room was silent. An awkward silent. I know the senior want to talk more, but nothing could leave his mouth. And Aiba-chan took this as his chance to leave. He apologized once more before heading out of the room, dragging me along. But Sakurai-san managed to catch his hand; grabbing him by his wrist he stopped him before we could step out of the room.
“I’m- I’m sorry,” the senior said, desperate. “But I reject your resignation, Aiba-chan,”
“It’s Aiba-san, Sakurai-san” Aiba-chan snapped. “You often told me to keep the terms between us strictly professional. Aiba-chan is only for those people who know me well. You’re not in that circle. So please don’t call me by that”
Sakurai-san bites his lips.
“Don't mind that. But please. Just don’t resign. I know I made you mad. I know you’re tired of me. But please just don’t. I need you” The man pleads. “Take as much time as you need. You need a break, go ahead. You wanna spend your time with your friend, go. But please just don’t resign. I still need you,”
Aiba-chan chuckled. I wasn’t sure for what reason though. But then he shook his head, pushing the senior’s hand away from his.
“Thank you. I’ll think about it. For now, I need a break,” he replied Sakurai-san coldly. And for once, the ego that Sakurai-san had built broke when he couldn’t find any words to stop the man anymore. Before, Sakurai-san would retort with his anger flaring when someone was rude or simply went against his decision, but today he stands in front of me silent, surrendering to his PA’s words.
Bowing a little, Aiba-chan pulled me to leave the senior alone in the room.
“So cool” I said once we’re a little bit far from the first place. He laughs bitterly.
“I wish I could be that cool since the beginning” he said, chuckling a little while keeping our steps together.
Both of us laugh.
We continued on walking until we reached our room. Not waiting for long, he throws himself to the bed while I close the door behind me.
For a while, none of us says anything. He kept staring at the ceiling with empty eyes, making me wonder what he’s thinking at the moment. Is he hurt? Or is he fine? I don’t know. Somehow that makes me uncomfortable. I don’t help my friend enough. And he went through a lot of things without me being a real helper.
My whole attention went back to him when I heard his sighs. Curious, I asked.
“What’s wrong?”
He shook his head.
“I miss that playground we used to play together in the past”
I laugh.
“What’s with that? Did you suddenly become a nostalgic person?” he laughs before abruptly stop. Slowly, he sits straight before turning his sight directly towards me. His expression is unreadable but I could distinguish a soft smile formed on his lips. Unconsciously, I smile back at him.
“Let’s skip our class for a few days!” he says, winking at me. I eye him curiously. When I finally get the grasp of what he’s trying to say to me, my eyes widen.
“Come on. Your mum won’t be that surprised if I suddenly crash in your home just for the night, will she?”
“No, she won’t. But I’m sure she’s gonna nag me because I didn’t tell her earlier about going back home”
“Then tell her. Come on. It’s not like I always bother you. Please… Nino-chan… for me. pleeeeeasssseeeeee,” he pleads me. I groan.
“What a nuisance,” I replied causing him to chuckle.
***
“You should have told me earlier, Kazu. I haven’t bought all the groceries,” my mum whines a few minutes after we step into the house. Throwing Aiba-chan an annoyed look, I mouth him ‘your fault’. All he does is laughing.
“Please don’t bother me, aunty. We didn’t really plan this ahead. I just miss this neighborhood,” Aiba-chan says, following my mum to the kitchen. “I hope I don’t trouble you,”
“Of course not,” my mum stops whatever she’s doing. Slowly she turns to take a proper look on my best friend. “It has been a long time since you’ve been here, Masaki-kun. It’s not a trouble at all. You used to spend most of your time in this house too. Feel free to do whatever you wanna do. But for now, I need to go to buy the groceries. I’ll cook you something special for today”
“You didn’t cook anything special when I came home, mum. That’s so unfair,” I said, faking a sulking tone, making the silent room filled with laughter.
“You’re just jealous that I have your mum’s extra attention, Nino,” Aiba-chan sticks out his tongue at me and I responded his doing by showing him my fist. Watching the two of us, all my mum could do, was laughing.
“You guys are 20 years old, but you act as if you were 6. Oh god, you guys make me all teary. It feels like yesterday when I saw that picture with Nino wearing your mum’s Chinese dress, Aiba-chan”
I rolled my eyes.
“Seriously mum. That is unnecessary,” I said, making the two of them laugh again. Slowly my lips form a smile.
It was such bliss to hear that hyena-type of laugh after a long time.
***
Having two 20-year-old men sitting on the swing is gross, let alone the childish hide and seek game between the two of us. But I couldn’t care less. I’m happy to watch my best friend laughing over silly things such as how his shoes smeared with mud at the playground, or how I fell down while trying to catch him.
That bright smile was back again. God, how I wish he had made that step year ago.
“Nino, here!” he waves his hand from the other part of the playground, near the small tunnel at the playground. He grins wider as I reach him, pointing at the inside of it.
“Take a look. It’s still there. I couldn’t believe in my eyes when I saw it,” he says, giggling happily.
“What is it?”
“I carved our name there”
“You what?” I went inside the tunnel to see what he mentioned earlier. “Nino & Aiba were here - 20 July 2003” was written there. Somehow my lips form a smile.
“What an idiot!” I said, laughing when I looked at him. The grin on his face never faded though, and there’s a chuckle along all this time.
“It’s still there. I can’t believe it. It has been 11 years, hasn’t it?”
“Yeah. And you had written my name without my permission, Aiba-chan,” he pouts. “But let’s leave another memory here”
Somehow that manages to make him smile. He searches around to find a sharp stone and when he found one, he passes it to me. Last time, it was his handwriting. This time, it is mine. “Aiba Masaki & Ninomiya Kazunari was here, 21st July 2014” was written, and both of us smile of satisfied.
“Let’s go home?” I say, and he replied it with a nod.
***
I could never describe my feelings at the moment. They made my chest so heavy from everything I had inside of me. I felt nostalgic, happy, sad, all mixed as one and it’s somehow confusing me why I’m having all these feelings inside of me; especially the sadness. Shouldn’t this happiness overwhelm the sadness that wasn’t supposed to be there in the first place?
1 am. The room was already dark since hours ago but I couldn’t drive myself to sleep and I’m sure the one lying next to me as well. He was on his one side before he shifts to his other, this time facing me. I could barely see his face because of the darkness of the room. But then I feel his hand roaming to my body, making me instantly slap his hand harshly. He laughs.
“So sensitive” he says chuckling.
I replied jokingly with a laugh. “So stupid” and then we laugh.
But after a while, we stop. The room turns silent once again. The only thing that could be heard was the sound of the clock ticking and the fan.
“I’m still gonna resign from being Sho-san’s assistant. No worries about it,” he says all of sudden. His voice is so clear to my ears that I’m sure he’s still facing me. Slowly, I shift to lie on my side, facing him.
“You know what’s better for you, Aiba-chan. You know you won’t be happy with him,” I said to hear him sigh afterwards.
“I know,” and then he paused. I could see him, due to the light that was coming through the windows in my room, biting his lips. “I’m sure I’m gonna be fine with you around. I’ve decided and there’s no way of turning back, right?”
I left the question unanswered. Just because I don’t know of the right answer. No one knows what future could bring. What if one day, Sakurai-san changed and finally acknowledged my friend’s feelings? Would Aiba-chan change his mind then?
“Ne, Nino-chan,” Aiba-chan calls me all of a sudden after a while of silence. I snort annoyingly.
“I said this from before, Aiba-chan! Stop adding -chan after my nick name!” I poke his waist that made him groan out of hurt.
“What’s wrong with that? You call me Aiba-chan” I could feel he’s pouting while saying those words.
“Nino is enough,” I pause, realizing that the man was giving a hint to change the topic. “What do you wanna talk about?”
I could feel his hand reaching mine. When he found my fingers, he linked our pinky finger.
“Let’s make a promise,”
“Huh?”
“Let’s graduate from the university with flying colours ne? Let’s secure ourselves a better future,”
“Huh? What’s with the sudden words?” I ask, scratching my head with my free hand. But he ignores my words and continues with whatever is on his mind instead.
“I wanna be your best man on your wedding. I already booked the position so you can’t say no” hearing this, I laugh.
“Of course I can. It’s my wedding. If you don’t achieve the standards, I’ll have to reject you!”
“Mou!!! I’m gonna chase you down until you’re in your grave if you don’t let me be your best man!!”
In the darkness, I could feel he’s pouting. I laugh imagining that. And then we fell silent. It’s only a moment later I heard snores from the older man, our pinky finger still linking to each other, I can’t help but chuckle.
“Of course you’ll be my best man, Aiba-chan. You have secured the spot since the first time we met” I said, before falling asleep with his snore as my lullaby.
***
I force myself to open my eyes when I feel the heat from the sunlight through my windows hitting my head. And the moment I open my eyes, Aiba-chan’s face was an inch away from mine. Startle, I jolt backwards.
“Ohayou,” he greets with his usual bright smile.
“You’re too close. Your breath stinks!” I say, pushing him away, making him roll to the other side before rolling back to me. Silly. I can’t help but laugh at him.
"I was wondering,” I raise a questioning eyebrow as I hear his words. “Why didn’t I fall in love with you, when it’s you I met first, before Sho-san?”
I laugh to his question. I didn’t answer it though.
“Seriously. It’s early in the morning. You should start up with a fresh thinking, not some ridiculous things” he laughs, closing the distance between us.
“No seriously. It’s bugging me since yesterday. Why was it? I wonder”
That’s because I don’t give you hope, Aiba-chan. He did. I let this thought inside my mind without voice it out.
I push him harder this time, laughing when he groans of the hard push.
“Seriously, you’re a 21-year-old boy. Your breath stinks. Wake up. I need to fold the futon,” I say as I stand up straight from the futon, ready to tidy up the room. He laughs.
But then, it instantly stops. From the corner of my eyes, I see the taller man hold his chest, clenching his shirt as if he’s suffering from the worst chest pain.
“What’s wrong Aiba-chan?” I ask, rushing towards him to hold him from falling.
“Nothing… I’m fine. Just, my chest pain, but I’m fine…” he says, trying to hide the pain behind a faked smile.
He’s not fine. Just when he started walking, I saw him losing his balanced before falling on the bedroom floor, head first.
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i'm gonna finish this before november.. i need to finish this before november. thank you for those who has been supporting me up till now. trully appreciate it. <3
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