I have dyed my hair 2-4 times a month this summer

[ibfailure]

just had the following conversation with my sister:
(ignore the fact that we're partially retarded)

me: WE'RE ALL FRANDS ON FACEBOOK WEEEE
sister: -headdesk-
me: bahahahahha
sister: I CANT BELIEVE I ADDED MOM
sister: >____<
me: good job
me: I didn't think you would
sister: HAVEYOU SEEN HER PICTURES ?!
sister: SHE'S SUCH A COUGAR OHMYGOD
me: no lol
me: HAHAHAHAHAHAHHA

I never thought my mother could be considered a cougar. damn.

also;;

me: you know what I was just thinking about?
guys are so lucky they don't have vaginas
it's so WEIRD to me when I think of sticking things INSIDE me
guys don't have to deal with that, they can stick there dick anywhere, it's the same concept as sticking your finger somewhere
kyle: lol yeh it is kinda weird, huh?
me: but if something's going in my vagina, I'm not 100% sure I'll ever see it again
kyle: hahahahha.
me: and vaginas hurt
it's so not fair
kyle: how do they hurt? OH, when having it for the first few times?
me: yeah and cramps suck a lot
kyle: yeh I can imagine
me: I had cramps on monday and I thought I was going to DIE because something was in there fucking up my ovaries with a blender
kyle: ...
me: and tampons are fascinating because you just stick them up there and then you can't feel it anymore, how can you not feel a piece of cotton lodged up inside you?
hahahahaha okay this is getting really fucked up
I have way too much time to think

&&&

sister: AND IT TOTALLY HURT MY BOOBS
like a LOT
I was like LAUREL RUB THEM D:
she was like NO WAY MAN
me: wait
what boobs?
sister: .....
I HAVE BOOBS DAMNIT
me: YOU HAVE BOOBS?
WHEN DID THIS HAPPEN
sister: VAL SHUT UP LMAO

in other news,
DAVE COMES BACK TOMORROW NIGHT!!!!!