just so you know

[ianlyzu]

my sister taught me how to swim. the pool was one thing, but where i got really good was at the beach. still very young, she would take me to the beach, and before allowing me to play in the sand or the water, she had me swim out to the buoy, tread water there for a while, then head back. i had to ignore the seaweed that would touch me, float past me or wrap around me, freaking me out each time. she taught me how to best manage rip tides, undertows, rough water and cross tides. in no time, my ability to handle distance swimming, regardless of the flag flying on the lifeguard stand, was amazing.

i learned how to exert the least amount of energy regardless of what the ocean was doing under me and around me while still remaining afloat.

i also learned how to find the surface by remaining calm if caught off guard by a wall of water, threatening to drown me, by looking for the bubbles and following them to the surface.

no matter what the conditions, no matter how rough the waves, no matter how disoriented i found myself or how tired i got, i became a master at using the water to guide me, support me and get me back safely to shore.

i realize how far from shore i currently am.
and i'm tired.
and the waves keep coming.
and the undertow is fierce.
and the tides are pulling me out further.
and the damn seaweed keeps touching me.

but,
i'm looking for the bubbles.