Today is the Birthday of both President James Polk and President Warren Harding!
I've never heard of pres Warren Harding. I guess he was one of those that had no war or huge thing go down to make him famous.
Well-
I've reached my low point. Actually I reached it two days ago. I think if I didn't have a fuckin easy class last block, I would have been more aware of my descent into wherever I've gone. I don't know exactly what is goin on, but I do know the consequences are an inability to do ANYTHING while feeling like I have no free time. It sucks. I don't know where the time goes. Or exactly what I've been doing during those times.
Monday, Matt and I had a discussion, which turned into him ranting about how irresponsible I am and how everything is my fault and how I am always late and how he tells me to meet him half an hour a head of time, so that I won't be late as to when he really wants me there. That hurt. And the worst thing was, it was all true. Except for the everything being my fault.. which we talked about later and fixed that. I thought he was going to break up with me. I realized then that this weird little place I was was really effecting him... affecting him... whatever... and us.
I mean, in addition to the Matt shit- I've nearly destroyed take back the night, just barely had someting for the teach-in, and maybe blown the whole gender-inclusive housing thing that we've got for Harlan. I've also not turned in the inventory that we've had done for a while of all the furntature and other shit in Harlan. I just have crapped out. And I don't really understand why.
On Tuesday, I went to go see someone at the counseling center. She had me write lists of all the things I had to do. And it was huge. She told me to prioritize and write out a schedule in my assignment notebook. Like with times and everything. 7:45- wake up 9:00- class 11:00-lunch 1:00-class 3:00-walk with matt 4:00-check email. I feel a little better. The schedule thing is working out, except now I see that I have too much stuff to do during the day to actually fit it into a day. I could do it last year, but for some reason not this year. I think I'm going to have to work less for WAG. I mean, I didn't have time to check my e-mail yesterday, and that is important to do everyday. And I haven't for a week. Tuesday night, I talked with Matt on the phone for a long time, and got a lot of things figured out. And I felt so much better.
AND I got an add-drop form in my mailbox that day. I stared at it for a while, seeing that my classes for 7th and 8th block got dropped, and then something called FLA-997-G (or something like that) were added to both blocks. And I realized that FLA-997-G was the number for GUATEMALA!!! I'm going to Guatemala! I was so happy, that I started laughing and making little happy squeeks while I was still at the mailboxes. There was one guy by the stairs, and I had no friends around. So I must have looked like a nut to him. So I decided I had to run to Harlan to tell everyone. But I am out of shape, and when Igot to Harlan, I had to sit down to tell everyone. I eventually laid down on the floor. It was such a happy time. But now I've made my list even longer. But it'll be worth it. But now I HAVE to check my e-mail because they might have e-mailed me something about it. But I'm still afraid to open it because its going to have so much stuff in it.
So Matt and I are better. And my class, Selling Sex: Feminist Discourses on the Sex Work Industry, fucking rocks. Its a lot of work, but its interesting. I'm going to a strip club for my paper. So... if anyone wants to come with me, let me know. You could buy a plane ticket back from Europe, or a bus ticket from Illinois, and come with! It would be awesome. And I have another counseling session scheduled for Tuesday at 6. And I feel better, except I've had this realy tiny dull headache for the past week. I think its tension. Maybe it'll go away when I get more of this stuff out of the way. If I can get on the computer again today, I'm going to write about the Teach inand Walk out that happened yesterday.
Well-
I've reached my low point. Actually I reached it two days ago. I think if I didn't have a fuckin easy class last block, I would have been more aware of my descent into wherever I've gone. I don't know exactly what is goin on, but I do know the consequences are an inability to do ANYTHING while feeling like I have no free time. It sucks. I don't know where the time goes. Or exactly what I've been doing during those times.
Monday, Matt and I had a discussion, which turned into him ranting about how irresponsible I am and how everything is my fault and how I am always late and how he tells me to meet him half an hour a head of time, so that I won't be late as to when he really wants me there. That hurt. And the worst thing was, it was all true. Except for the everything being my fault.. which we talked about later and fixed that. I thought he was going to break up with me. I realized then that this weird little place I was was really effecting him... affecting him... whatever... and us.
I mean, in addition to the Matt shit- I've nearly destroyed take back the night, just barely had someting for the teach-in, and maybe blown the whole gender-inclusive housing thing that we've got for Harlan. I've also not turned in the inventory that we've had done for a while of all the furntature and other shit in Harlan. I just have crapped out. And I don't really understand why.
On Tuesday, I went to go see someone at the counseling center. She had me write lists of all the things I had to do. And it was huge. She told me to prioritize and write out a schedule in my assignment notebook. Like with times and everything. 7:45- wake up 9:00- class 11:00-lunch 1:00-class 3:00-walk with matt 4:00-check email. I feel a little better. The schedule thing is working out, except now I see that I have too much stuff to do during the day to actually fit it into a day. I could do it last year, but for some reason not this year. I think I'm going to have to work less for WAG. I mean, I didn't have time to check my e-mail yesterday, and that is important to do everyday. And I haven't for a week. Tuesday night, I talked with Matt on the phone for a long time, and got a lot of things figured out. And I felt so much better.
AND I got an add-drop form in my mailbox that day. I stared at it for a while, seeing that my classes for 7th and 8th block got dropped, and then something called FLA-997-G (or something like that) were added to both blocks. And I realized that FLA-997-G was the number for GUATEMALA!!! I'm going to Guatemala! I was so happy, that I started laughing and making little happy squeeks while I was still at the mailboxes. There was one guy by the stairs, and I had no friends around. So I must have looked like a nut to him. So I decided I had to run to Harlan to tell everyone. But I am out of shape, and when Igot to Harlan, I had to sit down to tell everyone. I eventually laid down on the floor. It was such a happy time. But now I've made my list even longer. But it'll be worth it. But now I HAVE to check my e-mail because they might have e-mailed me something about it. But I'm still afraid to open it because its going to have so much stuff in it.
So Matt and I are better. And my class, Selling Sex: Feminist Discourses on the Sex Work Industry, fucking rocks. Its a lot of work, but its interesting. I'm going to a strip club for my paper. So... if anyone wants to come with me, let me know. You could buy a plane ticket back from Europe, or a bus ticket from Illinois, and come with! It would be awesome. And I have another counseling session scheduled for Tuesday at 6. And I feel better, except I've had this realy tiny dull headache for the past week. I think its tension. Maybe it'll go away when I get more of this stuff out of the way. If I can get on the computer again today, I'm going to write about the Teach inand Walk out that happened yesterday.