TRIP TO CRAIGGGG <3
The following is the story of when I went to see the Late Late Show, back in September. I went to the "if you don't vote, you're a moron" episode.
Besides the things in the brackets in the first few lines, I didn't edit any of this; it's the original thing I posted on a message board the week after I went to the show, so if any of it sounds weird, then that's why. =)
Before I begin, I must note the following things:
-Last Friday [the Friday before I went to the show], I got braces. Oh, yay.
-I got a tattoo on Tuesday [the day before the show]. Heck yes!
-I'm the most overly-obsessed-with-Craig-Ferguson 17 year old I know, and I tend to cry if I'm excited. -If this were an essay for school, I would probably get an F.
-These things probably seem boring to you, but later you'll see why I am mentioning them.
Okay. So I won't bore you with the boring details of how I had to stand outside the CBS place for like 45 minutes with my mom, being bored and babbling about how I'd like to go to Hollywood after the show, because--face it, that stuff is just boring. Plus, I'm guessing that most of you people have already been in that situation, so you know how boring it is to stand in line, waiting to see Craig Ferguson. And you also know that if you have metal rods and screws in your spine, that you will set off the metal detector, which is one of the things on your things-to-do-while-on-vacation list, and that the gift shop won't be open after the show, so GO BUY YOUR STUFF NOW, EVERYBODY! Right. So, I won't bore you with all those details. Let's move on.
All right, so I'm not used to walking up four flights of stairs, but I did it without complaining. Maybe it was because I was still freaking out about being in the same building as Craig Ferguson. Sorry, but I freak out over those kinds of things very easily. After standing by some guy in a gangster suit and some hippie ladies, we got to go into the faaaabulous studio thingy, which was much smaller than I thought it would be. My mom and I got to sit in the third row, over by the left, by the aisle. It was totally awesome, cuz the cameras didn't block anything and we could see Craig the whole time. Ohh, yes.
But he wasn't on yet. Duhh. Instead it was whatshisname, the warmup dude, you know? He was rad. When he started to throw FREEEEEE CANDYYY!, my mom caught one but I didn't, but he stopped right next to me and I was tempted to stick my hand in his pocket and take some. =] But I didn't, because I don't really like being arrested while I'm on vacation. Then he started to make fun of people, you know? Like the one guy in the tie, and the stupid girls in front of us. And then I was sitting there staring at him and he was like "You know, I once dated a girl with braces. They were on her legs." It wasn't really the best joke he made, but it was about me, which made it totally awesome. =] And now I feel honored to be made fun of by a guy who knows Craig Ferguson. =]
And then Alice Cooper came out to do all the musicy stuff. I never knew they did that before they taped the rest of the show, but I'm stupid so what do I know? He's cool and all, but I wasn't freaking out and screaming my head off like the girls in front of me. The one cool part about it was that he lives in Arizona, which is where I also live, and I had to go all the way to California just to see him. How ironic. My friend, who watched the show when it was on, told me that he looks like 80 years old. I replied with "He looks a lot better in person, trust me." All that was fine, but Alice Cooper wasn't who I came to see. I CAME TO SEE CRAIG FERGUSON!
So uhh, yeah. Then he came on, and I almost went to the bathroom a little. =] And I was pretty freakin excited when I went to a Ringo Starr concert in July, but here, I couldn't scream my brains out and all that, so I just clapped and yelled and whatever everybody else was doing. The only problem I had was that I got a tattoo on my wrist the day before, which wasn't too convenient when I was clapping and all that. It was still puffy and it was kind of sore, but that was the last thing on my mind at the moment. My mom said he looked kind of short...but I didn't really notice. But I did think that his hair looked a little poofier in person than it does on TV. TV sucks! The one thing that bothers me was he looked in my direction a few times, and I HATE not knowing what he was looking at! Was it me?! WAS IT?! And if it was, WHY was it? Why would he want to look at a braceface with an awesome bat tattooed on her wrist?! Anyway, I enjoyed looking at him and thinking, "That guy has met Ringo Starr!" Likewise, I enjoyed looking at Ringo at the concert and thinking, "That guy has met Craig Ferguson!"
Anyway, when it was time for Alice Cooper to come out for the interview thing, one of the cameras was pointing towards the audience, and it was right in front of me so I took that moment to look up at the TV, only to see myself ON THE TV! Well, I was only on it for like four seconds, but still, I was on TV, and I was on the Late Late Show! How's THAT for a souvenir?! Oh, and I made sure to tape it so I can show it to my stupid friends and brag to them. =]
After the other guest, one of the chicks from 90210, the warmup dude told one of the ladies in the audience to sing 15 seconds of her favorite Beatles song, which was cool because I love me some Beatles. In fact, it made me jealous cuz he asked HER and not ME! So, she sang Hey Jude, and of course everybody else started to sing it too. And then Sean Connery came out, (well, not really, because after they got done taping his skit, he pulled off his beard and such AND IT WAS CRAIG! And I was like "No way, I thought it was Sean Connery! How could you mess with my head like that?!" Perhaps I was overreacing becaue I've been enjoying a lot of herbal cigarettes lately.) and he was singing it too. I would have never guessed that a Beatles song would sound so cool sung in a Scottish accent. It was like the best thing EVERRRRR. It made up for him not doing any emails. After that, they showed an Aquaman thingy, which left the themesong in my head for the rest of the day, and then he was gone and I almost cried. =[ By this time, my wrist was hurting worse than ever, but it was totally worth it because it was all for Craig. =]
Now, if you'll excuse me, I'll Be There came in the mail while I was gone, and I must go watch it, because I obviously didn't get enough Craigness on vacation. =]
Besides the things in the brackets in the first few lines, I didn't edit any of this; it's the original thing I posted on a message board the week after I went to the show, so if any of it sounds weird, then that's why. =)
Before I begin, I must note the following things:
-Last Friday [the Friday before I went to the show], I got braces. Oh, yay.
-I got a tattoo on Tuesday [the day before the show]. Heck yes!
-I'm the most overly-obsessed-with-Craig-Ferguson 17 year old I know, and I tend to cry if I'm excited. -If this were an essay for school, I would probably get an F.
-These things probably seem boring to you, but later you'll see why I am mentioning them.
Okay. So I won't bore you with the boring details of how I had to stand outside the CBS place for like 45 minutes with my mom, being bored and babbling about how I'd like to go to Hollywood after the show, because--face it, that stuff is just boring. Plus, I'm guessing that most of you people have already been in that situation, so you know how boring it is to stand in line, waiting to see Craig Ferguson. And you also know that if you have metal rods and screws in your spine, that you will set off the metal detector, which is one of the things on your things-to-do-while-on-vacation list, and that the gift shop won't be open after the show, so GO BUY YOUR STUFF NOW, EVERYBODY! Right. So, I won't bore you with all those details. Let's move on.
All right, so I'm not used to walking up four flights of stairs, but I did it without complaining. Maybe it was because I was still freaking out about being in the same building as Craig Ferguson. Sorry, but I freak out over those kinds of things very easily. After standing by some guy in a gangster suit and some hippie ladies, we got to go into the faaaabulous studio thingy, which was much smaller than I thought it would be. My mom and I got to sit in the third row, over by the left, by the aisle. It was totally awesome, cuz the cameras didn't block anything and we could see Craig the whole time. Ohh, yes.
But he wasn't on yet. Duhh. Instead it was whatshisname, the warmup dude, you know? He was rad. When he started to throw FREEEEEE CANDYYY!, my mom caught one but I didn't, but he stopped right next to me and I was tempted to stick my hand in his pocket and take some. =] But I didn't, because I don't really like being arrested while I'm on vacation. Then he started to make fun of people, you know? Like the one guy in the tie, and the stupid girls in front of us. And then I was sitting there staring at him and he was like "You know, I once dated a girl with braces. They were on her legs." It wasn't really the best joke he made, but it was about me, which made it totally awesome. =] And now I feel honored to be made fun of by a guy who knows Craig Ferguson. =]
And then Alice Cooper came out to do all the musicy stuff. I never knew they did that before they taped the rest of the show, but I'm stupid so what do I know? He's cool and all, but I wasn't freaking out and screaming my head off like the girls in front of me. The one cool part about it was that he lives in Arizona, which is where I also live, and I had to go all the way to California just to see him. How ironic. My friend, who watched the show when it was on, told me that he looks like 80 years old. I replied with "He looks a lot better in person, trust me." All that was fine, but Alice Cooper wasn't who I came to see. I CAME TO SEE CRAIG FERGUSON!
So uhh, yeah. Then he came on, and I almost went to the bathroom a little. =] And I was pretty freakin excited when I went to a Ringo Starr concert in July, but here, I couldn't scream my brains out and all that, so I just clapped and yelled and whatever everybody else was doing. The only problem I had was that I got a tattoo on my wrist the day before, which wasn't too convenient when I was clapping and all that. It was still puffy and it was kind of sore, but that was the last thing on my mind at the moment. My mom said he looked kind of short...but I didn't really notice. But I did think that his hair looked a little poofier in person than it does on TV. TV sucks! The one thing that bothers me was he looked in my direction a few times, and I HATE not knowing what he was looking at! Was it me?! WAS IT?! And if it was, WHY was it? Why would he want to look at a braceface with an awesome bat tattooed on her wrist?! Anyway, I enjoyed looking at him and thinking, "That guy has met Ringo Starr!" Likewise, I enjoyed looking at Ringo at the concert and thinking, "That guy has met Craig Ferguson!"
Anyway, when it was time for Alice Cooper to come out for the interview thing, one of the cameras was pointing towards the audience, and it was right in front of me so I took that moment to look up at the TV, only to see myself ON THE TV! Well, I was only on it for like four seconds, but still, I was on TV, and I was on the Late Late Show! How's THAT for a souvenir?! Oh, and I made sure to tape it so I can show it to my stupid friends and brag to them. =]
After the other guest, one of the chicks from 90210, the warmup dude told one of the ladies in the audience to sing 15 seconds of her favorite Beatles song, which was cool because I love me some Beatles. In fact, it made me jealous cuz he asked HER and not ME! So, she sang Hey Jude, and of course everybody else started to sing it too. And then Sean Connery came out, (well, not really, because after they got done taping his skit, he pulled off his beard and such AND IT WAS CRAIG! And I was like "No way, I thought it was Sean Connery! How could you mess with my head like that?!" Perhaps I was overreacing becaue I've been enjoying a lot of herbal cigarettes lately.) and he was singing it too. I would have never guessed that a Beatles song would sound so cool sung in a Scottish accent. It was like the best thing EVERRRRR. It made up for him not doing any emails. After that, they showed an Aquaman thingy, which left the themesong in my head for the rest of the day, and then he was gone and I almost cried. =[ By this time, my wrist was hurting worse than ever, but it was totally worth it because it was all for Craig. =]
Now, if you'll excuse me, I'll Be There came in the mail while I was gone, and I must go watch it, because I obviously didn't get enough Craigness on vacation. =]