INTRO AND CONTACT

[iamthescouthere]

Still gotta set this crap up (this thing is more confusing than one of Engie's freakin' dispenser blueprints). In the meantime, gimme a ring-a-ding-ding. You might not get through 'cause of all of the sexy ladies that are callin' me every day and tyin' up my team's only landline... but hey, ain't no harm in tryin'.

Comments

[flitterflyxo]

*very dramatic sobbing and wailing at the other end*

SCOOOUUUUUUUUT!!!

I am having...*sob*sob* the worst...day...*sob*of my life! And...and...I feel like I don't have anyone to talk to...*sob* anymooorrre. *sniff* C-cause Grandma....is really old and deaf! And our other brothers..*sob* are all just jerks! And...we don't share a bedroom anymore...*sniff* so now I have nobody to listen to me.. when I'm upset!!

*more wailing*

J-Johnny broke up with me today...AGAIN! Because....his stupid fucking tacky HOE of a girlfriend is getting 'suspicious'! *sob*sob* I'm....just SO SICK OF THIS!! Why...why does he always choose HER over me!? Is it because.... because I don't have boobs like she does!? I KNOW it's not because she gives better blowjobs than I do, BUT STILL! It just pisses me off!

And....and you wanna know what the worse part of it is? *sniffle* Is that...now I'm going to be all alone for Christmas!*sob* And...I thought that this is probably going to be the worse Christmas ever...*sniff*sob* and..th-then, I remembered that Christmas that you broke my Ken Dreamhouse
with your stupid plane! And then when I remembered that, I was really mad at you! And you're not even here for me to BE mad at! Because you're out having a good ol' time with a bunch of ruggid, dirty, potientially single men, at some camp that I wasn't allowed to go to, because of my 'condition'! ITS NOT FAAAAAIIIIR!!!!!

*SOB*SOB*SOB*

*deep breath* I..I think that maybe I'll come and see how your doing soon, seeing as how you NEVER ANSWER THE PHONE WHEN I CALL! How am I even supose to know if you're still alive!? I'M YOUR BROTHER, SCOUT!! *sob* I'm sorry....I'm...I'm not mad at you...*sob* I'm mad at Johnny! And I'm sorry for bothering you...*sniffle* but I really miss you, so I'll see you as soon as I can get time off work, okay?

*more wailing as he hangs up the phone*

OOC- I just HAD to show you the picture I drew, and also send Scout a new message because Flit is so annoying like that. XDDD

[flitterflyxo]

OOC- I just noticed that link doesnt work. UGH!




there it is!

[iamthescouthere]

(OOC - KEN DREAMHOOOOOOOOSE OH GOD THE CABANA BOYS. You can't even imagine how much I laughed at this. I am so happy! And Flit's socks! HIS SOOOOCKS. Those ruffles are fabulous! Unless that's Scout! You can barely tell the two of them apart!)

[iamthescouthere]

Oh my GOD! Seriously, Flit, just… freaking' calm the hell down! Jesus, you're a grown man, for Christ's sake, don't cry just because you can't… ugh… seriously, please, cool your goddamn jets. Take a deep breath and all that crap.

Look, maybe… ugh, gross… first off, you gotta stop telling me that you're giving guys blowjobs. I don't wanna hear about it. Guh. I almost threw up my breakfast just saying the word blowjobs. Urk. Oh god, there goes my stomach again. Okay, second, listen, maybe you'll find some other… guy… or something. I dunno. Just. Come on, it's not like the world's going to explode or anything.

Oh man, those repressed memories are all coming back to me now. Hahaha. There were a record number of Ken causalities that day. Good ol' stealth bomber. But I think I still have the belt marks from what happened afterward. Fuckin' Dad. I can't believe I got into trouble.

…hey, uh… being alone for Christmas is the best! You don't have to have to deal with all of the crazy shit that happens with your family! I mean, remember last Christmas when everyone came over and Uncle Joey and Uncle Jesse had that huge fist fight in the living room, and then Ma was flipping out 'cause Freeloader brought all of his stupid ass friends back from his commune and shit? And then remember Dad got so pissed at Aunt Fran for, like, burning the ham or whatever, and threw the tree out of the window? Why do you wanna have to deal with all of that stupid stuff? I mean, if you came here, there'd be nothing but trouble! Things might be okay at first, but you know… we'd start fighting… I'd probably beat you up until you were crying… man, I don't think it's such a good idea. At all. You shouldn't do it. Just have a nice, relaxing Christmas at home with like… I don't know, get a freakin' cat or something.

[flitterflyxo]

You know...there is nothing wrong with a grown man crying, Scout! I never once made fun of you for crying everytime I turned on my rainbow lamp in our room..which you smashed, too, come to think of it! GAWD! YOU WERE SUCH A JERK!! GRANDMA GAVE ME THAT FOR OUR BIRTHDAY!! AND YOU WRECKED IT BECAUSE YOU WERE JEALOUS! UGH!!

Well...maybe...I'll just cook dinner for Freeloader or something because he LOVES food...if I can get him out of Mom and Dad's house..but I'm SO not going over there to watch Mom and Dad get drunk and yell at each other.

But, if you get lonely or homesick up there...and I'll know if you do, because I'm your twin! Don't hesitate to give me a call, and I'll be up in a jiffy! And by the way, I really don't think you could beat me up...I won all those medals in wrestling, remember!? Mmm....damn, Johnny looked hawt in those spandex...good times.

Well, thanks for calling me back, I feel a little bit better now. Love you, brother!

[iamthescouthere]

We almost had a goddamn leprechaun infestation with all of the freakin' rainbows you had in that room! Either that or I could have found enough pots of gold to get me the hell out of the house earlier than I did. And I WASN'T JEALOUS. I HATE RAINBOWS.

That's not such a bad idea. The guy's gotta get off his ass sometime. And seriously, he's still with mom and dad? I guess he can take their fighting, though. Guy's always as high as a kite.

Yeah yeah, whatever, just leave me alone, okay?

(OOC - NEVER LEAVE SCOUT ALONE NEVVVEEERRR)

[flitterflyxo]

Hey little brother!! So um...our brother Freeloader sent me this letter, but I think that it's actually for you. He probably got our addresses mixed up, that silly goose! I thought I'd just read it to you over the phone, because it's quicker that way and it's hard to make out his handwriting but anyways...

it says:

Dear Flit, I think he means Scout, but anyways.. Dear Flit, where are you, dude? I just noticed that like you and Scout don't live at home anymore but I totally thought you did- haha! Mom said you went to the army or some bullshit. That is LAAAME! And y'know...you should make love, man, not war. No..really, you need to get laid, bro. And like, it saddens me that one of my brothers has been brainwashed by the man, man....totally not cool, bro. Anyways...I was gonna tell you something...OH YEAH! So like, mom kicked me out of the house for not bathing and not wearing clothes in front of Grandma or some shit...she's a total trip, bro. She really needs to mellow out and stuff...but yeah. So for a while after that, I lived in a tent outside...and one morning, I woke up and I saw like...double rainbows, bro. All the way across the sky...and it was just so intense, man. I totally just let my emotions go at that moment and I started to cry because it was sooo vivid. Like, it even kinda looked like a triple rainbow, after I smoked some more grass, and the more I smoked, the more intense it was, so like...I totally get where your coming from, bro. And I'm sorry for ridiculing you all those years because I GET IT, man....its just....wow.

Well, have fun being a square, bro.

Peace.

And thats all it says...but you should write him back, he misses you! And I do too!! And I don't have to remind you what's coming up next month! I'm SO super excited! I have a HUGE surprise for you! I'm not gonna tell you what it is, but I will say that it is something FABULOUS!! And you're gonna love it!

Okay! I gotta go to work, but I'll talk to you soooon! BYE!!

(OOC- I wish I could play all of Scouts brothers, but...yeah. XD)