They're each for different people, mostly, and if you're reading this, odds are slim I mean you.
Slim, mind you.
- You seem to think that your experience on this spinning chunk of rock is universal, and to that degree look down on others for doing things that (1) you wouldn't want to or (2) did too much of. This is not the case, and you do both yourself and everyone else a great disfavor by judging them so harshly.
- Is this it for you? Really? The acme of your existence? Good for you, then, I suppose. But if you actually mean the talk you have of dreams and ambitions, you best start busting ass, otherwise you're GNDN. Going Nowhere, Doing Nothing. So, I ask again: is this it? A sad little monarch on a sad little hill?
- When I got a new phone, I got a ringtone just for you. I've never heard it.
- I know you know you help me in a few small ways pretty regularly, but you have no idea how much you help me overall. It wouldn't exactly be lying if I said you saved my life, but it's not a far exaggeration.
- Do you realize that, in fact, listening to other people will not, in fact, kill you? Seriously. I realize you know far more about what you're doing than I do, but I'm hardly new to this.
- Your warm welcome got cold with a quickness. What the fuck is that?
- Lately you've been giving me the impression that you're much smarter than you act. I hope that's true, but if it is, it makes some of your behaviors inexcusable.
- I have a growing suspicion you want something from me.
- Thank you for texting, I'm fine.
- I'm going out on a limb here and assuming you didn't recognize me for some reason, after looking directly at me and then looking away quickly, while you were out with (whom I've gathered from overhearing bits of conversation) your snooty new friends. Because that's fucking low.
- HA! You think you have secrets.