30 days of CM take two: day 12
Day 12 - least favourite season
Season Five
Honorable mentions: Season two, not because it's a bad season necessarily but because it just isn't as strong as S1, 3, and 4.
But let's talk about the clusterfuck that is season 5. I don't even really know where to start with this, mostly because it's hard for me to put a finger on what exactly it is that makes season five so unsatisfying. So I'ma deconstruct this beezy episode by episode.
5x01 "Faceless, Nameless"
OK, so I have gone on at length about my problems with this episode which basically break down to the Hotch flashbacks being too gratuitous and torture porn-ish for my tastes. CTH's performance as Foyet is entirely too hammy and ridiculous to take seriously. The more I evaluate this arc in retrospect, the more it falls apart, although most of the blame for that is on the suckhood that is Foyet. Really, what can you do with this joker.
5x02: Haunted
Not really a noteworthy ep except that we saw Hotch being a little unhinged after his encounter with Foyet.
5x03 "Reckoner"
I really don't remember much about this ep at all, tbh.
5x04 "Hopeless"
I believe this is the ep when Morgan met Tamara, and he and Garcia get into a fight about it? Also, more dark!Hotch and the team drinking together after the case in a scene reminiscent of the ending of "The Fox."
5x05 "Cradle to Grave"
I actually do remember this one--it was pretty solid, and I liked that Emily and JJ saw some action when Hotch sent them in the house first. This episode also begins the "Morgan as team leader" arc which had a great deal of promise, particularly since it picked up on a storyline that was begun with "Mayhem."
5x06 "The Eyes Have It"
Another good episode, which featured a case that was horrific without being gratuitous and featured a sympathetic storyline for the family of one of the victims. More dark Hotch, as we see his obsession with Foyet growing.
5x07 "The Performer"
A filler episode, and not a particularly good one. It's kind of goofy I guess, with the not-particularly-clever handling of a current trend and an odd sort of fanfic-ish quality to the characters' interactions. It's entirely too light in the midst of the darker plotlines going at the time, and I honestly don't know what this episode is doing here.
5x08 "Outfoxed"
This one is pretty "meh" to me... I don't remember a lot of it, except as buildup to the 100th ep. It was nice to see a returning unsub from S1, especially a week after a returning Cop of the Week from S1 (although I really could've lived without the reminder of "Somebody's Watching.")
5x09 "100"
The end of the Foyet plotline (thank Heathus) and a very intense episode, although when I actually watched it sober, it came off a bit melodramatic. It kind of loses steam the more I think about it, and a lot of that has to do with Foyet sucking so hard. Seriously, shittest. Villain. Ever. The strength of this episode was the team, and the Strauss interview scenes were excellent.
5x10 "Slave of Duty"
My favorite season 5 episode, because TGibs is perfection in it. I don't really know what else I can add to that. As for the case, it was well done, suitably creepy without being (too) gratuitous. The only thing that bothered me was Emily's little outburst at the end, b/c it struck me as sort of random... she's usually not one to go off like that. I felt like there was a cut scene that might've explained why she was so invested in the case, but whatever. It's a small thing.
5x11 "Retaliation"
I remember a lot of people were hoping for an Emily episode and this didn't exactly end up being one. The case was kind of convoluted and hard to keep track of, but I like that Emily had her hero moment and JJ got some action in the field.
5x12 "The Uncanny Valley"
This episode signals a turning point in S5, I think. There is a complete disconnect between the first 10 episodes of the season and the ones after this, with "Retaliation" kind of floating there in the middle. I thought there would be a short run of filler episodes before picking up the other plotlines started earlier in the season--particularly concerning Morgan--but instead, everything went right back to status quo and those plotlines were completely dropped.
But I digress. Back to TUC, it's not a bad episode, but it's not a really great one either. It stands out more for me because of the fucked-upness of the case (and also guest stars--crazy bitch who shot Booth on Bones and Commander Riker) than the actual story. Sadly, this isn't the first S5 episode to inspire this reaction.
5x13 "Risky Business"
Another fakeout centric episode. It was presented as JJ episode, and while we did learn a new fact about her, she really wasn't much of a presence at all aside from that. In fact, what stands out more for me is the Garcia fanservice.
I'm going to stress again that I like Garcia. Really I do. But I don't like this trend of taking her out from behind a computer screen and having her perform tasks she's neither trained for nor shown any particular inclination toward. It's unprofessional, it makes no sense with her characterization, and it often forces other characters to behave OOC or just look incompetent. Case in point: Morgan and Reid can't get anything out of a witness--in this case an emo kid--so they trot out Garcia to "connect" with him. WTF? Two field agents--both of whom know what it's like being an outcast in their youth, as established in "Elephant's Memory"--can't perform a task they're trained to do? So they get an untrained IT person to do it instead? Yeah, that makes a lot of sense.
I did enjoy JJ's final scene with Hotch, because I've always enjoyed their interaction and it was a nice way to see them connect and to actually address the events of "100" for the first time since "Slave of Duty." It's a beautifully shot scene, especially in that small space with the extreme close-ups, and felt very personal to me.
5x14 "Parasite" and 5x15 "Public Enemy"
It's weird how these cases can be so bizarre and yet so forgettable at the same time, but that's exactly what they are. It's as if the writers forgot that making cases as weird, extreme, and generally fucked-up as possible (see also: CSI Syndrome) is not what makes CM great. What matters is the story. There's a generic sort of quality to these eps, and it helps that the victims and unsubs weren't particularly memorable, either.
5x16 "Mosley Lane"
Ahh MGG's directorial debut. A strange little episode--very creepy, very effective, but not very "CM." I felt more like I was watching this freaky sort of fairytale horror flick, with the BAU as the Cops Who Discover It All, than an episode of CM.
5x17 "Solitary Man"
When the most memorable thing about this ep is a random lulzy guy in the background of the diner scene, you know there's a problem.
5x18 "The Fight"
Backdoor pilot for the spinoff. It fails as hard as you'd imagine. They should've cast the diner guy from "Solitary Man."
5x19 "Rite of Passage"
Slightly better than the other filler eps this season, but I still think it's memorable for the wrong reasons--the weirdness/extremeness of the case (dirtbikes and machine guns, gratuitously disgusting murders, the shootout near the end), increased focus on the CotW and unsub, generally feeling like a mini-action flick as opposed to a CM episode. Again, it's not a badly done episode, just not very "CM."
5x20 "A Thousand Words"
A strong case-centered episode with some nice team moments and a nice scene between Hotch and the CotW.
5x21 "Exit Wounds"
More Garcia fanservice, but slightly less offensive to me than in "Risky Business." I admit to some hardcore eyerolling when Garcia hears a strange noise and goes to investigate. (Does this woman never watch cheesy low-budget horror flicks?) Despite her being witness to a murder, Garcia's plotline was surprisingly dull, revealing nothing about her we didn't already know (Garcia has a big heart, loves people, doesn't have the stomach for the kind of work the rest of the team does because omg the victim was a PERSON). Oh, and I forgot to mention the truly horrendous attempt at "girl talk" at the beginning, with Emily and JJ. It sounded like something out of one of those Sweet Dreams teen romances in the 80s. The only believable part was after Garcia showed up. I don't think I'd ever been so glad to see her in my life.
The case itself was decent, and they did a pretty good job simulating Alaska. At least something in this ep was realistic.
5x22 "The Internet is Forever"
Thank you Heathus, a good, strong, case-centered episode. Enjoyed the touch of ironic humor with Rossi mocking social networking sites when JM's one of the biggest twitter whores of them all. This one felt almost like old-skool CM, which gave me hope for the finale, but that hope was promptly dashed in a week's time.
5x23 "Our Darkest Hour"
Make that "our dullest, most tedious-till-the-last-15-minutes" hour. This has to be the most half-assed season finale I've ever seen. Instead of picking up plot threads that had been left dangling, as most finales do, this episode just kind of meanders along and bumbles into an underwhelming conclusion. There was so much compelling stuff given to us at the beginning of S5--Morgan excelling far more at leadership than anyone planned as well as developing a taste for it; friction between Morgan and Garcia over Tamara; the fallout of Hotch's ordeal with Foyet/the loss of Haley--none of which is ever addressed again in any significant way. Instead, we're treated to an excess of noir-ish shots of L.A. at night and of Tim Curry being as greasy, smarmy, and generally gross as humanly possible. I guess crappy personal hygiene is what passes for a frightening villain these days. The plot--what there was of it--felt like it was more about the CotW than any of the CM characters. I guess there was supposed to be an emphasis on Morgan, but until the last 15 or so minutes he was about as much a presence as JJ was in "Risky Business." This is the first time in all my CM viewing that I finished a finale not saying "OMG I'll never maaaakkeee it" (well, I was marathoning over winter break so I just watched the next one, but I can't imagine having to wait all summer for the conclusion) but saying, "... yeah, i think I'll make it just fine."
---
So I guess the best way to describe most of S5 post-"Slave of Duty" is "forgettable." I did my S3 post almost entirely from memory, but I had to look up a lot of S5 eps on imdb in order to recall them. Granted I've watched S3 at least 3 times, but it's clearly strong enough that it can stand up to repeated viewings, and I don't think I'd ever want to watch most of S5 again. But jeez, you'd think I'd have at least remembered it on the basis of it being fresh in my mind. It's really disappointing seeing how promising the beginning of the season was.
And before anyone gives me the "You can't expect everything to stay the same. Shows grow and evolve!" let me explain. This is true. But their core elements remain the same--concept, tone, feel. The entire core of CM seems to be shifting. It's always been a very cerebral show, which separated it from other crime dramas--not only the psychological aspects, but also the subtlety of the writing. Horror was achieved more through the unseen than the seen, and cases frequently (though not always) engaged tough moral and ethical issues without giving a pat or easy answer. Now, the show seems to be focusing more on action and deriving most of its horror by making cases as gory/extreme/fucked-up as possible. Not to mention the increase in cute "character" moments and fanservice. Now, I'm not opposed to character moments, but CM isn't that kind of show. The reason why everyone enjoyed lighthearted team/character moments in the early seasons is because they were so few and far between. But if you have one every other episode than they start to lose their impact.
Unfortunately, S6 isn't shaping up to be much better--if anything, it's actually worse. The trends that began in S5 are showing up more and more often. And it's especially frustrating because eps like "The Internet is Forever" prove that the writers are still capable of generating quality episodes--they're just choosing not to. I suppose fucked-up cases and fanservice are easier than telling a good story, but I always thought CM was better than that. Guess I was wrong.
Season Five
Honorable mentions: Season two, not because it's a bad season necessarily but because it just isn't as strong as S1, 3, and 4.
But let's talk about the clusterfuck that is season 5. I don't even really know where to start with this, mostly because it's hard for me to put a finger on what exactly it is that makes season five so unsatisfying. So I'ma deconstruct this beezy episode by episode.
5x01 "Faceless, Nameless"
OK, so I have gone on at length about my problems with this episode which basically break down to the Hotch flashbacks being too gratuitous and torture porn-ish for my tastes. CTH's performance as Foyet is entirely too hammy and ridiculous to take seriously. The more I evaluate this arc in retrospect, the more it falls apart, although most of the blame for that is on the suckhood that is Foyet. Really, what can you do with this joker.
5x02: Haunted
Not really a noteworthy ep except that we saw Hotch being a little unhinged after his encounter with Foyet.
5x03 "Reckoner"
I really don't remember much about this ep at all, tbh.
5x04 "Hopeless"
I believe this is the ep when Morgan met Tamara, and he and Garcia get into a fight about it? Also, more dark!Hotch and the team drinking together after the case in a scene reminiscent of the ending of "The Fox."
5x05 "Cradle to Grave"
I actually do remember this one--it was pretty solid, and I liked that Emily and JJ saw some action when Hotch sent them in the house first. This episode also begins the "Morgan as team leader" arc which had a great deal of promise, particularly since it picked up on a storyline that was begun with "Mayhem."
5x06 "The Eyes Have It"
Another good episode, which featured a case that was horrific without being gratuitous and featured a sympathetic storyline for the family of one of the victims. More dark Hotch, as we see his obsession with Foyet growing.
5x07 "The Performer"
A filler episode, and not a particularly good one. It's kind of goofy I guess, with the not-particularly-clever handling of a current trend and an odd sort of fanfic-ish quality to the characters' interactions. It's entirely too light in the midst of the darker plotlines going at the time, and I honestly don't know what this episode is doing here.
5x08 "Outfoxed"
This one is pretty "meh" to me... I don't remember a lot of it, except as buildup to the 100th ep. It was nice to see a returning unsub from S1, especially a week after a returning Cop of the Week from S1 (although I really could've lived without the reminder of "Somebody's Watching.")
5x09 "100"
The end of the Foyet plotline (thank Heathus) and a very intense episode, although when I actually watched it sober, it came off a bit melodramatic. It kind of loses steam the more I think about it, and a lot of that has to do with Foyet sucking so hard. Seriously, shittest. Villain. Ever. The strength of this episode was the team, and the Strauss interview scenes were excellent.
5x10 "Slave of Duty"
My favorite season 5 episode, because TGibs is perfection in it. I don't really know what else I can add to that. As for the case, it was well done, suitably creepy without being (too) gratuitous. The only thing that bothered me was Emily's little outburst at the end, b/c it struck me as sort of random... she's usually not one to go off like that. I felt like there was a cut scene that might've explained why she was so invested in the case, but whatever. It's a small thing.
5x11 "Retaliation"
I remember a lot of people were hoping for an Emily episode and this didn't exactly end up being one. The case was kind of convoluted and hard to keep track of, but I like that Emily had her hero moment and JJ got some action in the field.
5x12 "The Uncanny Valley"
This episode signals a turning point in S5, I think. There is a complete disconnect between the first 10 episodes of the season and the ones after this, with "Retaliation" kind of floating there in the middle. I thought there would be a short run of filler episodes before picking up the other plotlines started earlier in the season--particularly concerning Morgan--but instead, everything went right back to status quo and those plotlines were completely dropped.
But I digress. Back to TUC, it's not a bad episode, but it's not a really great one either. It stands out more for me because of the fucked-upness of the case (and also guest stars--crazy bitch who shot Booth on Bones and Commander Riker) than the actual story. Sadly, this isn't the first S5 episode to inspire this reaction.
5x13 "Risky Business"
Another fakeout centric episode. It was presented as JJ episode, and while we did learn a new fact about her, she really wasn't much of a presence at all aside from that. In fact, what stands out more for me is the Garcia fanservice.
I'm going to stress again that I like Garcia. Really I do. But I don't like this trend of taking her out from behind a computer screen and having her perform tasks she's neither trained for nor shown any particular inclination toward. It's unprofessional, it makes no sense with her characterization, and it often forces other characters to behave OOC or just look incompetent. Case in point: Morgan and Reid can't get anything out of a witness--in this case an emo kid--so they trot out Garcia to "connect" with him. WTF? Two field agents--both of whom know what it's like being an outcast in their youth, as established in "Elephant's Memory"--can't perform a task they're trained to do? So they get an untrained IT person to do it instead? Yeah, that makes a lot of sense.
I did enjoy JJ's final scene with Hotch, because I've always enjoyed their interaction and it was a nice way to see them connect and to actually address the events of "100" for the first time since "Slave of Duty." It's a beautifully shot scene, especially in that small space with the extreme close-ups, and felt very personal to me.
5x14 "Parasite" and 5x15 "Public Enemy"
It's weird how these cases can be so bizarre and yet so forgettable at the same time, but that's exactly what they are. It's as if the writers forgot that making cases as weird, extreme, and generally fucked-up as possible (see also: CSI Syndrome) is not what makes CM great. What matters is the story. There's a generic sort of quality to these eps, and it helps that the victims and unsubs weren't particularly memorable, either.
5x16 "Mosley Lane"
Ahh MGG's directorial debut. A strange little episode--very creepy, very effective, but not very "CM." I felt more like I was watching this freaky sort of fairytale horror flick, with the BAU as the Cops Who Discover It All, than an episode of CM.
5x17 "Solitary Man"
When the most memorable thing about this ep is a random lulzy guy in the background of the diner scene, you know there's a problem.
5x18 "The Fight"
Backdoor pilot for the spinoff. It fails as hard as you'd imagine. They should've cast the diner guy from "Solitary Man."
5x19 "Rite of Passage"
Slightly better than the other filler eps this season, but I still think it's memorable for the wrong reasons--the weirdness/extremeness of the case (dirtbikes and machine guns, gratuitously disgusting murders, the shootout near the end), increased focus on the CotW and unsub, generally feeling like a mini-action flick as opposed to a CM episode. Again, it's not a badly done episode, just not very "CM."
5x20 "A Thousand Words"
A strong case-centered episode with some nice team moments and a nice scene between Hotch and the CotW.
5x21 "Exit Wounds"
More Garcia fanservice, but slightly less offensive to me than in "Risky Business." I admit to some hardcore eyerolling when Garcia hears a strange noise and goes to investigate. (Does this woman never watch cheesy low-budget horror flicks?) Despite her being witness to a murder, Garcia's plotline was surprisingly dull, revealing nothing about her we didn't already know (Garcia has a big heart, loves people, doesn't have the stomach for the kind of work the rest of the team does because omg the victim was a PERSON). Oh, and I forgot to mention the truly horrendous attempt at "girl talk" at the beginning, with Emily and JJ. It sounded like something out of one of those Sweet Dreams teen romances in the 80s. The only believable part was after Garcia showed up. I don't think I'd ever been so glad to see her in my life.
The case itself was decent, and they did a pretty good job simulating Alaska. At least something in this ep was realistic.
5x22 "The Internet is Forever"
Thank you Heathus, a good, strong, case-centered episode. Enjoyed the touch of ironic humor with Rossi mocking social networking sites when JM's one of the biggest twitter whores of them all. This one felt almost like old-skool CM, which gave me hope for the finale, but that hope was promptly dashed in a week's time.
5x23 "Our Darkest Hour"
Make that "our dullest, most tedious-till-the-last-15-minutes" hour. This has to be the most half-assed season finale I've ever seen. Instead of picking up plot threads that had been left dangling, as most finales do, this episode just kind of meanders along and bumbles into an underwhelming conclusion. There was so much compelling stuff given to us at the beginning of S5--Morgan excelling far more at leadership than anyone planned as well as developing a taste for it; friction between Morgan and Garcia over Tamara; the fallout of Hotch's ordeal with Foyet/the loss of Haley--none of which is ever addressed again in any significant way. Instead, we're treated to an excess of noir-ish shots of L.A. at night and of Tim Curry being as greasy, smarmy, and generally gross as humanly possible. I guess crappy personal hygiene is what passes for a frightening villain these days. The plot--what there was of it--felt like it was more about the CotW than any of the CM characters. I guess there was supposed to be an emphasis on Morgan, but until the last 15 or so minutes he was about as much a presence as JJ was in "Risky Business." This is the first time in all my CM viewing that I finished a finale not saying "OMG I'll never maaaakkeee it" (well, I was marathoning over winter break so I just watched the next one, but I can't imagine having to wait all summer for the conclusion) but saying, "... yeah, i think I'll make it just fine."
---
So I guess the best way to describe most of S5 post-"Slave of Duty" is "forgettable." I did my S3 post almost entirely from memory, but I had to look up a lot of S5 eps on imdb in order to recall them. Granted I've watched S3 at least 3 times, but it's clearly strong enough that it can stand up to repeated viewings, and I don't think I'd ever want to watch most of S5 again. But jeez, you'd think I'd have at least remembered it on the basis of it being fresh in my mind. It's really disappointing seeing how promising the beginning of the season was.
And before anyone gives me the "You can't expect everything to stay the same. Shows grow and evolve!" let me explain. This is true. But their core elements remain the same--concept, tone, feel. The entire core of CM seems to be shifting. It's always been a very cerebral show, which separated it from other crime dramas--not only the psychological aspects, but also the subtlety of the writing. Horror was achieved more through the unseen than the seen, and cases frequently (though not always) engaged tough moral and ethical issues without giving a pat or easy answer. Now, the show seems to be focusing more on action and deriving most of its horror by making cases as gory/extreme/fucked-up as possible. Not to mention the increase in cute "character" moments and fanservice. Now, I'm not opposed to character moments, but CM isn't that kind of show. The reason why everyone enjoyed lighthearted team/character moments in the early seasons is because they were so few and far between. But if you have one every other episode than they start to lose their impact.
Unfortunately, S6 isn't shaping up to be much better--if anything, it's actually worse. The trends that began in S5 are showing up more and more often. And it's especially frustrating because eps like "The Internet is Forever" prove that the writers are still capable of generating quality episodes--they're just choosing not to. I suppose fucked-up cases and fanservice are easier than telling a good story, but I always thought CM was better than that. Guess I was wrong.