i hate being sad and telling everyone about it-but i will anyway!
i'm a wreck
and i have a tummy ache
and a job
and I want my car
and my cat
and my friends
and a bf to care for me
and take care of me
and be there for me
and understand me
and forgive me
and stick by me
and make efforts
and occasionally put me before himself
like I try to do for other people
and to not be fairweather and fickle
and to try to see things my way
and to make attempts not to hurt me
and to realize what hes doing to me
and to try to fix things
and to want to make me happy
and cares when I'm not
because that's what love is
but
apparently Im DAMN NEEDY
and I have disgustingly unrealistic and outlandishly retarded expectations
I was SOOO happy not that long ago, things were great with everyone and I could drive and then I got into Flagler and everything was looking up and i wanted exploration and adventure and i was inspired and creative and I kept getting enlightened and having little epiphanies and i wanted to help people
and now i'm the one that needs help
and I dont know what happened
ERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
I'm more frustrated than sad, frustrated at my discontent, and then frustrated that im frustrated and BAH
ok thats all journal
peace out lj
=/