Possible epiphany?
I just had an interesting conversation with a close friend of mine, and they came to form the opinion that it is my belief that no one can change. This struck me in an epiphanic way. Maybe it's true...it could be why I, myself, am so resistant to change with regards to the things I'm unhappy with in my life. Maybe, with the belief that people can't change, I don't believe I can change.
If it's true, that is, that I feel people aren't capable of change, it seems to be on a subconscious level, tucked just under my psyche. I started this semester with the intention of changing my ways; becoming a successful student. While I've done more work this semester than I probably have since Junior High, I don't know that, in the end, I'm truly changing. I have been wasting time lately, giving up on hard projects with the notion of "Oh well" that I've always had. On the surface, I believe in the ability of people to change, but maybe I'm jaded...in the course of the conversation, I brought up my father, and how, even with 17 years of trying on the part of my mother, my brother and myself, he never did change his ways and play a more active role in our lives. Maybe this jaded me... Normally, in my life, I like to think that not really having a father hasn't affected me, but every once in a very long while, something with come out to remind me that, while I survived just fine with out him, there are still issues hovering around his absence from my childhood.
I'm really glad this came up. I think I need to explore it a bit further. It seems to me that it's an important undercurrent in my life and I think it deserves more thought.
To the one who stimulated this, I thank you for sharing that opinion with me.
As for the rest of my life, things are going OK...it's time to buckle down in school even more than before. It's proving difficult, but I'm still getting things done. I need to go to bed now, so that I may get more things done with the new day.
-Bradley B.
If it's true, that is, that I feel people aren't capable of change, it seems to be on a subconscious level, tucked just under my psyche. I started this semester with the intention of changing my ways; becoming a successful student. While I've done more work this semester than I probably have since Junior High, I don't know that, in the end, I'm truly changing. I have been wasting time lately, giving up on hard projects with the notion of "Oh well" that I've always had. On the surface, I believe in the ability of people to change, but maybe I'm jaded...in the course of the conversation, I brought up my father, and how, even with 17 years of trying on the part of my mother, my brother and myself, he never did change his ways and play a more active role in our lives. Maybe this jaded me... Normally, in my life, I like to think that not really having a father hasn't affected me, but every once in a very long while, something with come out to remind me that, while I survived just fine with out him, there are still issues hovering around his absence from my childhood.
I'm really glad this came up. I think I need to explore it a bit further. It seems to me that it's an important undercurrent in my life and I think it deserves more thought.
To the one who stimulated this, I thank you for sharing that opinion with me.
As for the rest of my life, things are going OK...it's time to buckle down in school even more than before. It's proving difficult, but I'm still getting things done. I need to go to bed now, so that I may get more things done with the new day.
-Bradley B.