I feel so alone when I post.
Everyone's entries are gone and it's a big white space.
It's scary, I'm sorry.
So, yeah. I'm alone right now, and will be for another 6-7 hours. What's new right? It's the realization that I'm alone for so long that hurts. I mean, I am never woken up to talk, never called late to solve a problem. My "friends" don't rely on me. And those people I know don't consider me a friend. It's sad. Sorry to use you as an example, but such as Ronda. She knows OF me. But knows nothing. We talk, we talked about five minutes, and she didn't bother to ask, nothing personal, nothing invasive. Just another example of people that don't care. it's ok, I guess they aren't to blame, they have their lives and are quite busy I'm sure. So why does it still hurt? It's instinct to want to be loved, but want about just liked? I haven't been liked by anyone that I REALLY wanted to be liked by for some time. And I'm not talking about a boy/girl thing. I'm speaking of someone truely liking me, liking my personality, my speach, my.... whatever. It's been some time. Maybe that's why. nevermind. Life is broken into two sections, the living part and the dying part. Where life is fun and exciting and you can't wait to see what happens next, then there is the time when it seems to slip by, unnoticed, and undesired, respectively.
I met a girl at the STARS thing. She was, in a word, bubbly. She was bright, happy, and just glad to be alive. She wasn't some home schooled kid, she was unique. I was too afraid to get her number. She lives in Pilot and I'm sure I'll never see her again, but I won't forget her anytime soon. She was living.
I know that no one will read this, other than you, because my life is static, I'm happy, I'm sad. Nothing else. And no one here REALLY cares. I could post a long one like this and in it I could lie about something huge and maybe ONE person would react, because they were the only one to notice. I miss life.
It's scary, I'm sorry.
So, yeah. I'm alone right now, and will be for another 6-7 hours. What's new right? It's the realization that I'm alone for so long that hurts. I mean, I am never woken up to talk, never called late to solve a problem. My "friends" don't rely on me. And those people I know don't consider me a friend. It's sad. Sorry to use you as an example, but such as Ronda. She knows OF me. But knows nothing. We talk, we talked about five minutes, and she didn't bother to ask, nothing personal, nothing invasive. Just another example of people that don't care. it's ok, I guess they aren't to blame, they have their lives and are quite busy I'm sure. So why does it still hurt? It's instinct to want to be loved, but want about just liked? I haven't been liked by anyone that I REALLY wanted to be liked by for some time. And I'm not talking about a boy/girl thing. I'm speaking of someone truely liking me, liking my personality, my speach, my.... whatever. It's been some time. Maybe that's why. nevermind. Life is broken into two sections, the living part and the dying part. Where life is fun and exciting and you can't wait to see what happens next, then there is the time when it seems to slip by, unnoticed, and undesired, respectively.
I met a girl at the STARS thing. She was, in a word, bubbly. She was bright, happy, and just glad to be alive. She wasn't some home schooled kid, she was unique. I was too afraid to get her number. She lives in Pilot and I'm sure I'll never see her again, but I won't forget her anytime soon. She was living.
I know that no one will read this, other than you, because my life is static, I'm happy, I'm sad. Nothing else. And no one here REALLY cares. I could post a long one like this and in it I could lie about something huge and maybe ONE person would react, because they were the only one to notice. I miss life.