(no subject)
I'm so so confused lately...And no, i'm not about to start complaining about boys as i ussually do when my entry starts out like this, lol
And acctually i'm not complaining at all, just comming to the realization of a few things!
It's this living situation thingie that i'm so confused about!
I think it's time for me to realize that i'm like fuckin' THIS close to being homeless. I mean come on!
I'm living with a friend wo can hardly take care of herself and DEFINATELY shouldn't be bourdened with the task of harboring two other people!
We don't eat and sometimes i don't know when the next time is tht i am gonna eat; i get a bus pass like only half the time i need one...and when i don't i absolutely can't stay at home; and bottom line, i don't like freeloading, i'm in the way and recently i'm feeling like i don't belong, like i used to have such great friendships but now i'm just... there.
Everybody's changed, i feel like we've just met or something.
It's hell to feel like this.
I can feel my life becoming what i never wanted it to be and i have to change that!!
And i will change it...whatever i have to do, i will!
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I'm in Akron right now visiting the family before they leave, my mom's move date got postponed on something, she's waiting on a check or something, so anywayz, i'm spending time with them...
It's kinda weird to be here after 2 months. Weird that last night i heard my mom ask my brother if he wanted a cigarette :-/ ewwww.. and weird that when my brother got caught fucking some girl in him room early this morning, all my mom said way 'boy, get that girl out of here or tell her to shut the hell up' SICK!
I don't feel weird here though, like it's somewhere i don't belong...
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So about 80's night. I guess i had enough fun last night to not even go again till prom night... i realized that the people i used to be excited about seeing...i wasn't excited to see on tuesday, except a few people; Tiffany, her friends, Tim and Carla ...maybey a couple more. It was weird. So, they'll propably be just one more for me if i can help it.
Steve, didn't expect to see him there but i did. Got to hang out and dance with him which was awsome! :-D
Oh yea, that guy from 'This is exploding' was there! :-)
He gave me free tix to their show!!
Umm...that's really it!!
And acctually i'm not complaining at all, just comming to the realization of a few things!
It's this living situation thingie that i'm so confused about!
I think it's time for me to realize that i'm like fuckin' THIS close to being homeless. I mean come on!
I'm living with a friend wo can hardly take care of herself and DEFINATELY shouldn't be bourdened with the task of harboring two other people!
We don't eat and sometimes i don't know when the next time is tht i am gonna eat; i get a bus pass like only half the time i need one...and when i don't i absolutely can't stay at home; and bottom line, i don't like freeloading, i'm in the way and recently i'm feeling like i don't belong, like i used to have such great friendships but now i'm just... there.
Everybody's changed, i feel like we've just met or something.
It's hell to feel like this.
I can feel my life becoming what i never wanted it to be and i have to change that!!
And i will change it...whatever i have to do, i will!
_____________________________________________________________
I'm in Akron right now visiting the family before they leave, my mom's move date got postponed on something, she's waiting on a check or something, so anywayz, i'm spending time with them...
It's kinda weird to be here after 2 months. Weird that last night i heard my mom ask my brother if he wanted a cigarette :-/ ewwww.. and weird that when my brother got caught fucking some girl in him room early this morning, all my mom said way 'boy, get that girl out of here or tell her to shut the hell up' SICK!
I don't feel weird here though, like it's somewhere i don't belong...
_____________________________________________________________
So about 80's night. I guess i had enough fun last night to not even go again till prom night... i realized that the people i used to be excited about seeing...i wasn't excited to see on tuesday, except a few people; Tiffany, her friends, Tim and Carla ...maybey a couple more. It was weird. So, they'll propably be just one more for me if i can help it.
Steve, didn't expect to see him there but i did. Got to hang out and dance with him which was awsome! :-D
Oh yea, that guy from 'This is exploding' was there! :-)
He gave me free tix to their show!!
Umm...that's really it!!