Abbey Girls fic: Written for IDAHO
Title: Understanding Maidie
Fandom: Abbey Girls by Elsie Oxenham
Characters/Pairings: Joy, Jen, Mary, Maidlin; Joy/Maidlin
Rating: PG
Summary: A few years after Joy has been widowed, she can’t understand why Maidlin is being so temperamental.
“I don’t understand her.” Joy’s eyes followed as Maidlin rushed across the grass towards the Abbey, her invariable choice of sanctuary.
“No,” said Jen gently. “But you do try, ‘Traveller’s Joy’. Keep trying. She loves you very much, you know.”
“I love her.” Joy sighed. “I thought that love was supposed to bring understanding. It seems to keep me and Maid further apart than ever.”
Mary looked up from her writing pad.
“I may be wrong, but I think she’s worried that things are going to change,” she said diffidently.
“Change?” Joy looked up at her straightly. “How?”
Mary hesitated, but as Jen added her own query, she said
“You’ve seemed… different lately. I haven’t liked to say anything, or ask; but I think Maidlin can feel it too. And Maidlin has never liked change, and I think she’s frightened.”
“Can you say any more, Mary-Dorothy?” asked Jen. “Has she spoken to you?”
Mary shook her head.
“I may be imagining things. You know what I am. But Joy has seemed - more restless, somehow, than she’s been since the twins were born. Am I being silly?”
Joy bit her lip.
“I had been thinking that I might visit town occasionally,” she confessed. “It was nothing more than a thought: I didn’t think I was so transparent. But that wouldn’t change anything here. Not between Maid and me.”
Jen looked serious.
“Have you said anything to Maid about this, Joy?”
“No. I told you: it’s only a thought.”
“Well then, dear; if you haven’t told Maidlin what you’re thinking, how is she to know that there’s nothing to worry about?” Jen pointed out. “Oh Joy! You know what she is. If she knows that you’re looking around, she’ll start feeling that she’s not enough for you. And if you don’t give her any hint of what it is that’s bothering you, she’ll be sure of it.”
“I didn’t think that anyone knew,” wailed Joy.
Jen looked grave.
“Maidlin’s sensitive, my love, especially where you’re concerned. You know you come first with her in every way. Did you really think you could keep something from her and not have her know you were doing so?”
Joy sighed, burying her head in her hands.
“I suppose I just didn’t think at all,” she admitted.
“Go after her,” urged Jen. “Tell her you love her. Tell her what’s been bothering you. Talk to her.” She looked at Mary. “Isn’t that right? You know girls; and most importantly you know Maidlin. Shouldn’t Joy talk it out?”
“I think so.” Mary looked anxious at having her opinion consulted, but spoke up bravely. “Maidlin will only be happy when she knows what’s going on, but more, when she knows that you trust her - that you can tell her everything, share with her. She’ll be wondering how you’ve been having your evening talks without saying anything; thinking that the only reason is because you’re growing away from her. She’ll be torn between a desire to cling to you and a desire to let you do whatever makes you happiest. And…”
“And that’s what caused her flare-up just now,” Jen finished for her. “Joy…”
But Joy was already going, running towards the Abbey as if she were a girl again.
“Maid!” she called breathlessly. “Maid, talk to me. Talk to me. I’m sorry.”
She saw a black-haired figure huddled in the Sacristy, shaking with sobs.
“Darling Maid…” Joy’s arms were around her. “Please don’t cry.”
Maidlin clung to her, sobbing out her fear and her longing together.
“Joy, I…”
“Shh, shh, I know. Oh Maidie, don’t you trust me yet?”
“You left me before.” The words were almost incomprehensible, but Joy understood.
“For Andrew. Yes. I was young and silly, and driven distracted by the idea that someone might like me… like that. And he was - he was forceful, and I thought…” She buried her head on Maidlin’s shoulder. “Anyway, that’s over. Andrew’s dead, Maid. We’re alive. You and I. And I thought you trusted me?”
“I do, I do, but… You’re different recently.”
“Silly Maid!” Joy’s voice was very tender, as few ever heard her. “I was just thinking that I might go to town occasionally, go to a concert here or there. That was all. It’s been a long time…”
“Yes,” Maidlin agreed soberly, thinking back to the years that had passed in wonderful solitude.
“Forgiven?” Joy asked.
And Maidlin held Joy closer than ever.
“Oh, Joy, I love you so much,” she whispered.
“I know,” said Joy, and did not loosen her grip.
Fandom: Abbey Girls by Elsie Oxenham
Characters/Pairings: Joy, Jen, Mary, Maidlin; Joy/Maidlin
Rating: PG
Summary: A few years after Joy has been widowed, she can’t understand why Maidlin is being so temperamental.
“I don’t understand her.” Joy’s eyes followed as Maidlin rushed across the grass towards the Abbey, her invariable choice of sanctuary.
“No,” said Jen gently. “But you do try, ‘Traveller’s Joy’. Keep trying. She loves you very much, you know.”
“I love her.” Joy sighed. “I thought that love was supposed to bring understanding. It seems to keep me and Maid further apart than ever.”
Mary looked up from her writing pad.
“I may be wrong, but I think she’s worried that things are going to change,” she said diffidently.
“Change?” Joy looked up at her straightly. “How?”
Mary hesitated, but as Jen added her own query, she said
“You’ve seemed… different lately. I haven’t liked to say anything, or ask; but I think Maidlin can feel it too. And Maidlin has never liked change, and I think she’s frightened.”
“Can you say any more, Mary-Dorothy?” asked Jen. “Has she spoken to you?”
Mary shook her head.
“I may be imagining things. You know what I am. But Joy has seemed - more restless, somehow, than she’s been since the twins were born. Am I being silly?”
Joy bit her lip.
“I had been thinking that I might visit town occasionally,” she confessed. “It was nothing more than a thought: I didn’t think I was so transparent. But that wouldn’t change anything here. Not between Maid and me.”
Jen looked serious.
“Have you said anything to Maid about this, Joy?”
“No. I told you: it’s only a thought.”
“Well then, dear; if you haven’t told Maidlin what you’re thinking, how is she to know that there’s nothing to worry about?” Jen pointed out. “Oh Joy! You know what she is. If she knows that you’re looking around, she’ll start feeling that she’s not enough for you. And if you don’t give her any hint of what it is that’s bothering you, she’ll be sure of it.”
“I didn’t think that anyone knew,” wailed Joy.
Jen looked grave.
“Maidlin’s sensitive, my love, especially where you’re concerned. You know you come first with her in every way. Did you really think you could keep something from her and not have her know you were doing so?”
Joy sighed, burying her head in her hands.
“I suppose I just didn’t think at all,” she admitted.
“Go after her,” urged Jen. “Tell her you love her. Tell her what’s been bothering you. Talk to her.” She looked at Mary. “Isn’t that right? You know girls; and most importantly you know Maidlin. Shouldn’t Joy talk it out?”
“I think so.” Mary looked anxious at having her opinion consulted, but spoke up bravely. “Maidlin will only be happy when she knows what’s going on, but more, when she knows that you trust her - that you can tell her everything, share with her. She’ll be wondering how you’ve been having your evening talks without saying anything; thinking that the only reason is because you’re growing away from her. She’ll be torn between a desire to cling to you and a desire to let you do whatever makes you happiest. And…”
“And that’s what caused her flare-up just now,” Jen finished for her. “Joy…”
But Joy was already going, running towards the Abbey as if she were a girl again.
“Maid!” she called breathlessly. “Maid, talk to me. Talk to me. I’m sorry.”
She saw a black-haired figure huddled in the Sacristy, shaking with sobs.
“Darling Maid…” Joy’s arms were around her. “Please don’t cry.”
Maidlin clung to her, sobbing out her fear and her longing together.
“Joy, I…”
“Shh, shh, I know. Oh Maidie, don’t you trust me yet?”
“You left me before.” The words were almost incomprehensible, but Joy understood.
“For Andrew. Yes. I was young and silly, and driven distracted by the idea that someone might like me… like that. And he was - he was forceful, and I thought…” She buried her head on Maidlin’s shoulder. “Anyway, that’s over. Andrew’s dead, Maid. We’re alive. You and I. And I thought you trusted me?”
“I do, I do, but… You’re different recently.”
“Silly Maid!” Joy’s voice was very tender, as few ever heard her. “I was just thinking that I might go to town occasionally, go to a concert here or there. That was all. It’s been a long time…”
“Yes,” Maidlin agreed soberly, thinking back to the years that had passed in wonderful solitude.
“Forgiven?” Joy asked.
And Maidlin held Joy closer than ever.
“Oh, Joy, I love you so much,” she whispered.
“I know,” said Joy, and did not loosen her grip.