(no subject)
I was looking through my fanfic folder to find the Kuro/Fai anniversary fics I still haven't finished (yes, for shame, iambic!) and while I still haven't found 'em, I did find several fics that I realise I hadn't posted anywhere. Here's one, and there may be more coming.
Title: Open To Interpretation
Fandom: xxxHOLiC
Wordcount: 1,123
A/N: The events that take place before the fic are not really explained. This is so because they don't matter. The focus is on other things that are open to interpretation. :D Also, I realise that the scenario in this fic and my other two-part HOLiC fic are similar. Really similar. In my defense? I'd forgotten this one existed.
without further ado...
Open To Interpretation
It was a strange world, where words never meant what they said or said what they meant. It was a strange place to be, with the friend who isn’t really an enemy but knows too many of wrong buttons to push to be anything else. There isn’t a place to move to from here that he or the other could see, so instead they sit and push at each other, hoping that one day the reaction will cause a new path to open.
Shizuka had never been an impatient person, but the stagnation was getting even to him. He wanted to do something about it. There were some days he wanted to punch Watanuki as hard as he could for being so stupid, so inconsiderate, so focused only on himself. And then the guy would get himself into another dangerous situation requiring a friend’s aid (or rather, a special kind of friend who could deal with more occult problems) and just like that Shizuka would go. There was no moment of thought, no wondering if it was a good idea. And yet there was no taking in this strange friendship, only giving. Giving help, giving food, giving chances that were never taken…
There was - had to be - a reason for them to spend time together. Shizuka himself had other friends, including the entirety of the archery team, and surely Watanuki wasn’t a complete loner (which he isn’t, a voice in the back of his head said with an air of self-satisfaction; he’s got you) and knew other people. And they both acted like they hated the other.
But there it was - they acted. Because in the moments it mattered, neither of them refused to work together. It was only when there was a life-threatening situation or life-changing event that they ever let on to each other (or themselves, for that matter) that there was a strong bond of friendship.
It was a disconcerting thought, to say the least.
He wouldn’t have been thinking about it much, except that this was one of the not-so-rare moments in which there was a life-threatening situation, or rather had been. Watanuki was silent for once, sprawled on the futon, probably not quite asleep. Shizuka hadn’t allowed him to go home, suspecting concussion and as his temple was closer. There was no arguing, probably in part because neither had the strength but mostly because there was no point in the aftermath of a struggle.
“Doumeki…”
Shizuka looked down at his (dare he think it) friend who wasn’t asleep and declined to respond.
“Earlier, when we first started being chased…what did you see?”
He raised his glance to the window and thought, wings. But that wasn’t right. “I saw another oozing thing, like the ones that normally chase you,” Shizuka said after a moment’s struggle to remember the event. He felt suddenly tired, as if the thought process had sapped the remainder of his energy, and had to struggle not to lie down there on the floor and sleep.
Watanuki said nothing for a long time, and Shizuka thought that was the end of the matter.
“Did you see anything else at any point?”
He didn’t need to try and remember this time. “Not that I noticed,” he replied.
There was another long pause, which Shizuka correctly recognised this time as not an end but a gathering of thoughts into words, and attempt say what didn’t have any words inside Watanuki’s head. They were both tired, it was late, and yet neither one was asleep. Granted, sleep wasn’t the best idea for Watanuki, but if he had really wanted to, good sense would not have deterred him. If it existed in him at all. Sometimes Shizuka wondered about that.
“I…didn’t see what you saw, then.”
Something about that should have made sense, if Shizuka was reading between the lines properly. Quite a lot of what Watanuki said had to be interpreted, and that was a difficult task. This time, it was proving more than a tired Shizuka could deal with.
“Being?” he asked shortly.
There was no reply, and when he looked down Watanuki had turned to the other side and his face was no longer visible.
“Being?” he asked again, more insistently.
“…Myself.”
Silence reigned once more as Shizuka contemplated the various meanings this revelation might have to Watanuki. The most obvious was that it would be very discomforting to be chased by himself. But perhaps it was some kind of spirit that showed something meaningful. And then there was the very strange fact that they had seen different things with the same eye.
And of course, the fact that Shizuka had shot the spirit as it closed in probably did not help if the spirit had Watanuki’s form. Watching his protector shoot a copy of himself was probably rather alarming, not to mention watching that same copy disintegrate.
But the spirit had injured both of them, and so it was clear that whatever it may have looked like, it wasn’t at all a part of Watanuki. And Shizuka had seen a form he thought was the true one, because of its familiarity.
“The whole time?” he asked eventually.
“Yes.”
“It never looked like anything but a regular spirit to me,” said Shizuka, wondering if he was qualified to make that judgement.
“That’s strange.”
“You would think so.”
That got Watanuki’s attention, and he rolled over. “What are you implying by that?” he demanded, sounding like his usual argumentative self. “If this is about me getting into another mess, it’s not my fault I attract the damn things! And unlike some people, I don’t have special powers to defend myself.”
But maybe Shizuka was getting better at interpreting Watanuki’s way of speaking, because he understood clearly the underlying meaning: Thank you. It was not something Watanuki ever actually said. It was debatable whether he was capable of doing so, at least where Shizuka was concerned.
“How’s you head?” he asked, meaning, You’re welcome.
“It’s…not bad,” Watanuki replied, startled out of his rant before he could work himself into a proper rage. That was generally the most effective way of cutting short the shouting, because often it prevented the whole tirade.
“Then you should sleep,” Shizuka told him, wishing for once that the gratitude was expressed openly because he knew that doing so would get them somewhere. But that was asking the impossible of both of them, so in the morning they would bicker again and the incident would be nothing more than the latest on a long list of others like it.
Watanuki did not reply, but closed his eyes, and this said more clearly than anything else, I trust you to keep me safe.
At least there was that.
Title: Open To Interpretation
Fandom: xxxHOLiC
Wordcount: 1,123
A/N: The events that take place before the fic are not really explained. This is so because they don't matter. The focus is on other things that are open to interpretation. :D Also, I realise that the scenario in this fic and my other two-part HOLiC fic are similar. Really similar. In my defense? I'd forgotten this one existed.
without further ado...
Open To Interpretation
It was a strange world, where words never meant what they said or said what they meant. It was a strange place to be, with the friend who isn’t really an enemy but knows too many of wrong buttons to push to be anything else. There isn’t a place to move to from here that he or the other could see, so instead they sit and push at each other, hoping that one day the reaction will cause a new path to open.
Shizuka had never been an impatient person, but the stagnation was getting even to him. He wanted to do something about it. There were some days he wanted to punch Watanuki as hard as he could for being so stupid, so inconsiderate, so focused only on himself. And then the guy would get himself into another dangerous situation requiring a friend’s aid (or rather, a special kind of friend who could deal with more occult problems) and just like that Shizuka would go. There was no moment of thought, no wondering if it was a good idea. And yet there was no taking in this strange friendship, only giving. Giving help, giving food, giving chances that were never taken…
There was - had to be - a reason for them to spend time together. Shizuka himself had other friends, including the entirety of the archery team, and surely Watanuki wasn’t a complete loner (which he isn’t, a voice in the back of his head said with an air of self-satisfaction; he’s got you) and knew other people. And they both acted like they hated the other.
But there it was - they acted. Because in the moments it mattered, neither of them refused to work together. It was only when there was a life-threatening situation or life-changing event that they ever let on to each other (or themselves, for that matter) that there was a strong bond of friendship.
It was a disconcerting thought, to say the least.
He wouldn’t have been thinking about it much, except that this was one of the not-so-rare moments in which there was a life-threatening situation, or rather had been. Watanuki was silent for once, sprawled on the futon, probably not quite asleep. Shizuka hadn’t allowed him to go home, suspecting concussion and as his temple was closer. There was no arguing, probably in part because neither had the strength but mostly because there was no point in the aftermath of a struggle.
“Doumeki…”
Shizuka looked down at his (dare he think it) friend who wasn’t asleep and declined to respond.
“Earlier, when we first started being chased…what did you see?”
He raised his glance to the window and thought, wings. But that wasn’t right. “I saw another oozing thing, like the ones that normally chase you,” Shizuka said after a moment’s struggle to remember the event. He felt suddenly tired, as if the thought process had sapped the remainder of his energy, and had to struggle not to lie down there on the floor and sleep.
Watanuki said nothing for a long time, and Shizuka thought that was the end of the matter.
“Did you see anything else at any point?”
He didn’t need to try and remember this time. “Not that I noticed,” he replied.
There was another long pause, which Shizuka correctly recognised this time as not an end but a gathering of thoughts into words, and attempt say what didn’t have any words inside Watanuki’s head. They were both tired, it was late, and yet neither one was asleep. Granted, sleep wasn’t the best idea for Watanuki, but if he had really wanted to, good sense would not have deterred him. If it existed in him at all. Sometimes Shizuka wondered about that.
“I…didn’t see what you saw, then.”
Something about that should have made sense, if Shizuka was reading between the lines properly. Quite a lot of what Watanuki said had to be interpreted, and that was a difficult task. This time, it was proving more than a tired Shizuka could deal with.
“Being?” he asked shortly.
There was no reply, and when he looked down Watanuki had turned to the other side and his face was no longer visible.
“Being?” he asked again, more insistently.
“…Myself.”
Silence reigned once more as Shizuka contemplated the various meanings this revelation might have to Watanuki. The most obvious was that it would be very discomforting to be chased by himself. But perhaps it was some kind of spirit that showed something meaningful. And then there was the very strange fact that they had seen different things with the same eye.
And of course, the fact that Shizuka had shot the spirit as it closed in probably did not help if the spirit had Watanuki’s form. Watching his protector shoot a copy of himself was probably rather alarming, not to mention watching that same copy disintegrate.
But the spirit had injured both of them, and so it was clear that whatever it may have looked like, it wasn’t at all a part of Watanuki. And Shizuka had seen a form he thought was the true one, because of its familiarity.
“The whole time?” he asked eventually.
“Yes.”
“It never looked like anything but a regular spirit to me,” said Shizuka, wondering if he was qualified to make that judgement.
“That’s strange.”
“You would think so.”
That got Watanuki’s attention, and he rolled over. “What are you implying by that?” he demanded, sounding like his usual argumentative self. “If this is about me getting into another mess, it’s not my fault I attract the damn things! And unlike some people, I don’t have special powers to defend myself.”
But maybe Shizuka was getting better at interpreting Watanuki’s way of speaking, because he understood clearly the underlying meaning: Thank you. It was not something Watanuki ever actually said. It was debatable whether he was capable of doing so, at least where Shizuka was concerned.
“How’s you head?” he asked, meaning, You’re welcome.
“It’s…not bad,” Watanuki replied, startled out of his rant before he could work himself into a proper rage. That was generally the most effective way of cutting short the shouting, because often it prevented the whole tirade.
“Then you should sleep,” Shizuka told him, wishing for once that the gratitude was expressed openly because he knew that doing so would get them somewhere. But that was asking the impossible of both of them, so in the morning they would bicker again and the incident would be nothing more than the latest on a long list of others like it.
Watanuki did not reply, but closed his eyes, and this said more clearly than anything else, I trust you to keep me safe.
At least there was that.