(no subject)
I just read my old journal entries from last year.
...how pathetic. I was the most annoying and dramatic and whiny little brat you ever could have met. blah blah blah josh hurt me...blah blah austin was mean to me....blah blah my life is stuck in a whirlwind of darkness....yeah retarded.
I also noticed how much I depended on people. Now I love people...everybody needs people in order to be social and so on...but to have your happiness rely on other people. Its ridiculous...because to other people...they are always gonna come first. Subconciously or not. Why must you let your feelings be determined by their actions? Just enjoy their company when you have it.
I have changed so much. I'm more sarcastic and cynical...but I'm not as wishy washy. I'm more independant and more social than I've ever been. I'm confident (for the most part..everybody has doubts now and then). I'm determined. I'm wiser because I've learned from everything that has happened to me. Now I'm going to say that I've been through a lot in my life...and I don't want people to tell me I haven't and that I've had it easy. Cuz I have not had it easy. I've had to fight dealing with my dad's Lupus, my family having no money, losing my friends to death and fights and moving, and my own depression and so much more that I don't feel like writing about in this dinky journal. But looking at it...they've made me who I am today. I'm grateful for it happening to me...because when I get out into the real world and on my own. I'm going to be the one to survive...and the one who is going to make it. I'm going to be the one who will accomplish their goals with hard work and dedication and so forth. Every hardship that I've had to deal with helps to prepare me for my future. So bring them on...Can't wait for Senior Year!
I'm ready for adventure, excitement, and every now and then to just relax and do shit nothing. So everybody...this summer lets have the time of our life! Lets go all out...there is no excuse for being bored when there is so much to do around you.
and I'm done...haha and yall will probably make fun of me for this thing...oh well you can if you want! :)
...how pathetic. I was the most annoying and dramatic and whiny little brat you ever could have met. blah blah blah josh hurt me...blah blah austin was mean to me....blah blah my life is stuck in a whirlwind of darkness....yeah retarded.
I also noticed how much I depended on people. Now I love people...everybody needs people in order to be social and so on...but to have your happiness rely on other people. Its ridiculous...because to other people...they are always gonna come first. Subconciously or not. Why must you let your feelings be determined by their actions? Just enjoy their company when you have it.
I have changed so much. I'm more sarcastic and cynical...but I'm not as wishy washy. I'm more independant and more social than I've ever been. I'm confident (for the most part..everybody has doubts now and then). I'm determined. I'm wiser because I've learned from everything that has happened to me. Now I'm going to say that I've been through a lot in my life...and I don't want people to tell me I haven't and that I've had it easy. Cuz I have not had it easy. I've had to fight dealing with my dad's Lupus, my family having no money, losing my friends to death and fights and moving, and my own depression and so much more that I don't feel like writing about in this dinky journal. But looking at it...they've made me who I am today. I'm grateful for it happening to me...because when I get out into the real world and on my own. I'm going to be the one to survive...and the one who is going to make it. I'm going to be the one who will accomplish their goals with hard work and dedication and so forth. Every hardship that I've had to deal with helps to prepare me for my future. So bring them on...Can't wait for Senior Year!
I'm ready for adventure, excitement, and every now and then to just relax and do shit nothing. So everybody...this summer lets have the time of our life! Lets go all out...there is no excuse for being bored when there is so much to do around you.
and I'm done...haha and yall will probably make fun of me for this thing...oh well you can if you want! :)