Santa Baby
To whom it may concern:
Please do not tell a certain person, who isn't a friend as much as a colleague, that you are buying one of your husband's Christmas gifts at Victoria's Secret. And then do not proceed to show said colleague what exactly you bought, especially if it is a skimpy Santa outfit. And the next day, pretty pretty please do not tell the colleague that you couldn't wait until Christmas to give your husband said gift, that you'd given it to him the night before, and that he loved it. Because then that will put evil thoughts into your colleague's head that she will have to share with other colleagues, who will not care to know that, either. Especially considering one specific colleague will then think of the song "Santa Baby" upon hearing that, and now imagines you every time she hears that song. It does not help that Victoria's Secret also is using the song in TV ads to promote their products, and it appears that Heidi Klum is wearing a similar outfit in the commercial. Your colleagues know you are no Heidi Klum. Worse is that the first colleague noticed that Victoria's Secret has changed its window displays and now features said outfit, so that any time we are in that part of the mall, we shall think of you. Fabulous. Because you are exactly who I want to think of when I see lingerie. Er, I mean...never mind.
Please do not tell a certain person, who isn't a friend as much as a colleague, that you are buying one of your husband's Christmas gifts at Victoria's Secret. And then do not proceed to show said colleague what exactly you bought, especially if it is a skimpy Santa outfit. And the next day, pretty pretty please do not tell the colleague that you couldn't wait until Christmas to give your husband said gift, that you'd given it to him the night before, and that he loved it. Because then that will put evil thoughts into your colleague's head that she will have to share with other colleagues, who will not care to know that, either. Especially considering one specific colleague will then think of the song "Santa Baby" upon hearing that, and now imagines you every time she hears that song. It does not help that Victoria's Secret also is using the song in TV ads to promote their products, and it appears that Heidi Klum is wearing a similar outfit in the commercial. Your colleagues know you are no Heidi Klum. Worse is that the first colleague noticed that Victoria's Secret has changed its window displays and now features said outfit, so that any time we are in that part of the mall, we shall think of you. Fabulous. Because you are exactly who I want to think of when I see lingerie. Er, I mean...never mind.