Call of the wild grandma
Since I'm off this week, one of the activities I wanted to do was go visit grandma. Dad begged off, but mom and I made plans last week to see her either this Wednesday or Thursday, depending on the weather. And then on Sunday, we never talked to her because she slept the day away, but she talked to my uncle so at least we knew she was okay. He'd texted mom while on the phone with grandma, so she went, tell her we'll come over on Wednesday! He relayed the message.
My aunt and uncle then went over there on Tuesday, since they still had custody of her furniture dolly, but they had an issue: They also couldn't get a hold of her despite calling several times. Luckily they'd brought along keys and were able to get in, where they found her sleeping on the sofa. The anxiety is rampant in our family, and my uncle was upset that he hadn't gotten in touch with her, and texted mom that perhaps we could look into VOIP phones so she could have a home phone once again, five years after a series of mishaps caused her to lose her original one. Her building has AT&T, so they would need to be contacted.
We left about 10:15, figuring it would take an hour and 15 minutes to get there; it was more like an hour and 30. I managed to get a great spot in the restaurant's lot near where I dropped them off, though grandma was all confused about something and was extra poky getting out of my car. Someone had just pulled out and another car was coming so I went, just grab mom's hand and shut the door! Just know that if I hadn't gotten that spot, I would have had to have parked way down the lot since it was full by the restaurant. What was confusing grandma was that she hadn't brought her cane. Her shopping cart, however, was rattling around in my trunk.
We went to Blossom Café, which I've passed multiple times and where both of them have gone at least once or twice before. The outside patio was packed but the inside had room, but it was dark--dark enough that grandma actually asked our waiter if he could turn the lights up. No, he told her. I ended up reading off the specials to her and on the fourth one, she went, I'll get that! And ended up with a huge club sandwich that I imagine she'll pick at for a few days. Mom got some sort of lamb skewer that was like a deconstructed gyro, and I opted for the French toast trio--challah, brioche, and banana bread, all topped with different fruits, plus a side of sausage links. So much food. Oh, and bread and whipped butter. Mom's and grandma's food came with soup, and the waiter asked if I wanted any and I said no. He still came out with three bowls, with the third one placed by me. I said, I didn't order soup. He said, happy birthday. Yes, well, I hate it when food gets wasted, and I had no intention of eating it--because perhaps I ordered a dish that specifically did not come with soup--but mom ended up having some of it after eating the chicken and pasta out of hers. She left the broth behind in both but I suppose at least they got eaten.
Grandma offered to give me driving tips on the way back, specifically her shortcuts. I said I was good and doing what I was comfortable doing. She tries to be helpful but I've taken her shortcuts before. They've included driving through the city college parking lot where the speed limit is 10 MPH, or possibly cutting through alleys and stuff. I don't live in the city. I don't want to drive like I live in the city. In my still new-ish car, I want to do things that will lessen the chance of my car being around another car. Like, please don't take me down narrow side streets with cars parked on both sides, thanks. Mom and I had discussions on the way there and back about how opinionated grandma is. Yes, in case you didn't know where yours came from. And, AND, grandma managed to leave the house without keys. She doesn't always lock her door so getting in her place proper wouldn't necessarily be an issue, but getting in the building itself would be. Luckily I'd thought to have mom grab her keys, just in case--this was more in case she was asleep when we got there, not for this reason--so mom was able to get in through the garage and come around to the lobby to get us. This gave me enough time to unload some of the stuff from my car and get grandma out, though she walked herself into the building while I parked.
Back at grandma's, I hadn't anticipated staying for very long, but we had a phone call with AT&T that lasted an hour and 15 minutes. When the phone call started and mom told grandma she was going to see if we could get her a home phone again, grandma was all, the cost doesn't matter! And by the end of it when her monthly bill (which is nearly $200 just for cable TV) raised by nearly $100, she was clearly having cold feet and mom told the gal on the phone that she was talking grandma off the cliff. Like...the phone isn't going to be $20 a month and that's it. To get VOIP, you have to have internet to begin with, which grandma does not (she got rid of it years ago when she got rid of her computer), and then pay for phone service on top of that, PLUS she'd have to acquire a VOIP-compatible phone on her own and get it installed. I think that's the part that caused her to flip out a bit, but since this was my uncle's project, he'll get to finish it off. Honestly, we had a devil of a time just confirming that she was the account holder, because she couldn't remember her passcode, and the single security question they had for her was, who was your childhood hero? And grandma had no clue, only that it was likely a guy because in her day, only guys were heroes. Mom had actually called AT&T in the morning before we left and knew was the question was, so she was trying to get that answer out of her before we made that call, and she had no idea. Thankfully the original guy who answered the phone was able to ask a question that we could answer--what's the serial number on her router--and that was able to get us into her account, but dang. And I had to crawl on my hands and knees to find that, since it was on the floor under her desk in her living room. That was 10 minutes of our lives we won't get back, not to mention his. It's no fun being 92 and not having a good memory.
Mom already had a project she'd wanted to work on at grandma's, and that was to figure out where she was with her prescriptions. She has five. Mom's in charge of ordering them online, so early on in the phone call, I went around and found as many bottles as I could to see how full they were. They were in several places in and around the kitchen, and then I found a couple in weird spots, and a couple were empty, and then what are these two unrelated bottles on the kitchen table? Turns out she'd gone to the dentist on Tuesday and didn't tell anyone! She'd had some pain in her mouth and called her dentist late last week, but they couldn't get her in for a few days, and by that time the pain was gone, but they gave her some pills just in case, I guess. And while mom was on the phone and still trying to get into grandma's account, here's grandma going through her mail right next to where mom's sitting, but she's messing with probably the noisiest envelope ever, one with a big cellophane window on it, so I'm trying to quiet her, but she can't hear me or tell what I'm trying to do, so now she's getting kind of loud, and now we've both annoyed my mom and she's getting upset and swatting at us, which really PO'd grandma, and a minute later the first phone guy had put us on hold so we were able to tell grandma what was happening and she calmed down, but this is one of the joys of mom putting every call ever on speaker phone. I mean, it was helpful so that the both of them (and occasionally me) could talk to the service rep, but still. It's inconsiderate to have extraneous noise going on when you do that.
And then there was the smell. Grandma's bathroom had kind of a funky smell. When we put her leftovers in her fridge, there was a funky smell. And then after we took the trash out twice to help with those, there was still a funky smell in her kitchen. She'd had old food in the fridge and probably something soiled in her bathroom, and when mom looked at her fruit bowl there was an apple that only had a small part on top that wasn't brown. Yeah...we found some of the sources of the smells. And then I was asked if I could figure out what battery the clock over the kitchen sink took, so I took down the clock, and I promptly lost the nail on which it was hanging. I didn't hear a sound so I'm guessing it fell on the rug that runs the length of the kitchen counter, but I couldn't find it despite sweeping the rug. I looked hard. That's not good. And after all that, I had to put the clock up without a battery in it since she didn't have any AAs with which to replace it, though at least she did have extra nails in a drawer. That's probably when I heard the random fan sound and discovered the exhaust fan attached to her microwave, installed over the range, was running. Grandma had no idea. It was a simple push of the button but it was quick to turn it off. We've had to point out to her several times that she has to be careful with where she holds and touches things, like on her cellphone and now the microwave (TV remotes also fall in this category), because it's easy to screw things up simply by grabbing them the wrong way. She's long been a careless person who doesn't pay full attention to what she's doing and that causes lots of issues sometimes.
But. We did set her up with VOIP service, and she has a phone number assigned, though the situation took so long that the original phone number that was chosen ended up not being available by the time it officially was to be assigned. The rep gal, the second person we talked with on the phone (she was on the phone end; the first guy was with the cable end, since that's all we had at first) said she would send along something called a gateway box that would arrive today. Grandma called this morning and said she'd slept for probably 12 hours all told and was just getting up; it was about 11 AM. At that point, the package was still out for delivery, but shortly after it arrived. Mom tried to call grandma to go grab it but got no answer for hours. Finally a little before 6, she did call--she'd been sleeping again--and mom had her go down and get the box. My uncle and male cousins will try to go over there this weekend since they're the techies of the family; they'll also need to get her a phone. Grandma, when we left yesterday, wondered if we were doing the right thing. I mean, let's try it and find out. She complains that she can't hear her phone ring--and phrases it as, it doesn't ring!--but it's plenty loud enough. I tested it twice. Having a home phone may at least give us the peace of mind of trying to reach her in another way. She's long hated her cell phone. Mom went, now you have a new phone to hate! Grandma may well get a newfound appreciation for said cell phone after all this.
We'd finished lunch around 1, 1:15; we didn't leave grandma's until about 4:30, and we'd still had an errand to run. Mom was all, do you want to drive around the old neighborhood? Haha, NO. I did not expect to have to drive home in rush hour traffic! Had it been 2:30, maybe; it's been a while since I last saw our old house. But my plan had always been to go to Rich's and pick up food for dinner. I can't not go there if we're this close! Plus, that's at least on the way home. We were there until about 5:30, then started the trek home, where we immediately encountered a train--and then the person in front of me randomly tried to back up. Hi, everyone's not moving; where the heck do you think you're going to go? We were also in the right lane, so we had a full lane of traffic to our left and then the sidewalk and cemetery to our right. I started honking at her, and I could tell she was flipping out in the car in front of me. She did at least put on her turn signal, so that once traffic started moving again, the car next to us was able to let her into the left lane--and she ended up doing a U-turn and heading northbound. Oh-kay. Well, at least she's out of our hair. And then a while later, after traffic had been moving really well on North Avenue, all of a sudden it got pretty slow and the people on the right started moving left. Yep, we have an accident. That tied up traffic for a bit, but past that point all was well. We got home just before 7. That was a much longer day than anticipated.
My aunt and uncle then went over there on Tuesday, since they still had custody of her furniture dolly, but they had an issue: They also couldn't get a hold of her despite calling several times. Luckily they'd brought along keys and were able to get in, where they found her sleeping on the sofa. The anxiety is rampant in our family, and my uncle was upset that he hadn't gotten in touch with her, and texted mom that perhaps we could look into VOIP phones so she could have a home phone once again, five years after a series of mishaps caused her to lose her original one. Her building has AT&T, so they would need to be contacted.
We left about 10:15, figuring it would take an hour and 15 minutes to get there; it was more like an hour and 30. I managed to get a great spot in the restaurant's lot near where I dropped them off, though grandma was all confused about something and was extra poky getting out of my car. Someone had just pulled out and another car was coming so I went, just grab mom's hand and shut the door! Just know that if I hadn't gotten that spot, I would have had to have parked way down the lot since it was full by the restaurant. What was confusing grandma was that she hadn't brought her cane. Her shopping cart, however, was rattling around in my trunk.
We went to Blossom Café, which I've passed multiple times and where both of them have gone at least once or twice before. The outside patio was packed but the inside had room, but it was dark--dark enough that grandma actually asked our waiter if he could turn the lights up. No, he told her. I ended up reading off the specials to her and on the fourth one, she went, I'll get that! And ended up with a huge club sandwich that I imagine she'll pick at for a few days. Mom got some sort of lamb skewer that was like a deconstructed gyro, and I opted for the French toast trio--challah, brioche, and banana bread, all topped with different fruits, plus a side of sausage links. So much food. Oh, and bread and whipped butter. Mom's and grandma's food came with soup, and the waiter asked if I wanted any and I said no. He still came out with three bowls, with the third one placed by me. I said, I didn't order soup. He said, happy birthday. Yes, well, I hate it when food gets wasted, and I had no intention of eating it--because perhaps I ordered a dish that specifically did not come with soup--but mom ended up having some of it after eating the chicken and pasta out of hers. She left the broth behind in both but I suppose at least they got eaten.
Grandma offered to give me driving tips on the way back, specifically her shortcuts. I said I was good and doing what I was comfortable doing. She tries to be helpful but I've taken her shortcuts before. They've included driving through the city college parking lot where the speed limit is 10 MPH, or possibly cutting through alleys and stuff. I don't live in the city. I don't want to drive like I live in the city. In my still new-ish car, I want to do things that will lessen the chance of my car being around another car. Like, please don't take me down narrow side streets with cars parked on both sides, thanks. Mom and I had discussions on the way there and back about how opinionated grandma is. Yes, in case you didn't know where yours came from. And, AND, grandma managed to leave the house without keys. She doesn't always lock her door so getting in her place proper wouldn't necessarily be an issue, but getting in the building itself would be. Luckily I'd thought to have mom grab her keys, just in case--this was more in case she was asleep when we got there, not for this reason--so mom was able to get in through the garage and come around to the lobby to get us. This gave me enough time to unload some of the stuff from my car and get grandma out, though she walked herself into the building while I parked.
Back at grandma's, I hadn't anticipated staying for very long, but we had a phone call with AT&T that lasted an hour and 15 minutes. When the phone call started and mom told grandma she was going to see if we could get her a home phone again, grandma was all, the cost doesn't matter! And by the end of it when her monthly bill (which is nearly $200 just for cable TV) raised by nearly $100, she was clearly having cold feet and mom told the gal on the phone that she was talking grandma off the cliff. Like...the phone isn't going to be $20 a month and that's it. To get VOIP, you have to have internet to begin with, which grandma does not (she got rid of it years ago when she got rid of her computer), and then pay for phone service on top of that, PLUS she'd have to acquire a VOIP-compatible phone on her own and get it installed. I think that's the part that caused her to flip out a bit, but since this was my uncle's project, he'll get to finish it off. Honestly, we had a devil of a time just confirming that she was the account holder, because she couldn't remember her passcode, and the single security question they had for her was, who was your childhood hero? And grandma had no clue, only that it was likely a guy because in her day, only guys were heroes. Mom had actually called AT&T in the morning before we left and knew was the question was, so she was trying to get that answer out of her before we made that call, and she had no idea. Thankfully the original guy who answered the phone was able to ask a question that we could answer--what's the serial number on her router--and that was able to get us into her account, but dang. And I had to crawl on my hands and knees to find that, since it was on the floor under her desk in her living room. That was 10 minutes of our lives we won't get back, not to mention his. It's no fun being 92 and not having a good memory.
Mom already had a project she'd wanted to work on at grandma's, and that was to figure out where she was with her prescriptions. She has five. Mom's in charge of ordering them online, so early on in the phone call, I went around and found as many bottles as I could to see how full they were. They were in several places in and around the kitchen, and then I found a couple in weird spots, and a couple were empty, and then what are these two unrelated bottles on the kitchen table? Turns out she'd gone to the dentist on Tuesday and didn't tell anyone! She'd had some pain in her mouth and called her dentist late last week, but they couldn't get her in for a few days, and by that time the pain was gone, but they gave her some pills just in case, I guess. And while mom was on the phone and still trying to get into grandma's account, here's grandma going through her mail right next to where mom's sitting, but she's messing with probably the noisiest envelope ever, one with a big cellophane window on it, so I'm trying to quiet her, but she can't hear me or tell what I'm trying to do, so now she's getting kind of loud, and now we've both annoyed my mom and she's getting upset and swatting at us, which really PO'd grandma, and a minute later the first phone guy had put us on hold so we were able to tell grandma what was happening and she calmed down, but this is one of the joys of mom putting every call ever on speaker phone. I mean, it was helpful so that the both of them (and occasionally me) could talk to the service rep, but still. It's inconsiderate to have extraneous noise going on when you do that.
And then there was the smell. Grandma's bathroom had kind of a funky smell. When we put her leftovers in her fridge, there was a funky smell. And then after we took the trash out twice to help with those, there was still a funky smell in her kitchen. She'd had old food in the fridge and probably something soiled in her bathroom, and when mom looked at her fruit bowl there was an apple that only had a small part on top that wasn't brown. Yeah...we found some of the sources of the smells. And then I was asked if I could figure out what battery the clock over the kitchen sink took, so I took down the clock, and I promptly lost the nail on which it was hanging. I didn't hear a sound so I'm guessing it fell on the rug that runs the length of the kitchen counter, but I couldn't find it despite sweeping the rug. I looked hard. That's not good. And after all that, I had to put the clock up without a battery in it since she didn't have any AAs with which to replace it, though at least she did have extra nails in a drawer. That's probably when I heard the random fan sound and discovered the exhaust fan attached to her microwave, installed over the range, was running. Grandma had no idea. It was a simple push of the button but it was quick to turn it off. We've had to point out to her several times that she has to be careful with where she holds and touches things, like on her cellphone and now the microwave (TV remotes also fall in this category), because it's easy to screw things up simply by grabbing them the wrong way. She's long been a careless person who doesn't pay full attention to what she's doing and that causes lots of issues sometimes.
But. We did set her up with VOIP service, and she has a phone number assigned, though the situation took so long that the original phone number that was chosen ended up not being available by the time it officially was to be assigned. The rep gal, the second person we talked with on the phone (she was on the phone end; the first guy was with the cable end, since that's all we had at first) said she would send along something called a gateway box that would arrive today. Grandma called this morning and said she'd slept for probably 12 hours all told and was just getting up; it was about 11 AM. At that point, the package was still out for delivery, but shortly after it arrived. Mom tried to call grandma to go grab it but got no answer for hours. Finally a little before 6, she did call--she'd been sleeping again--and mom had her go down and get the box. My uncle and male cousins will try to go over there this weekend since they're the techies of the family; they'll also need to get her a phone. Grandma, when we left yesterday, wondered if we were doing the right thing. I mean, let's try it and find out. She complains that she can't hear her phone ring--and phrases it as, it doesn't ring!--but it's plenty loud enough. I tested it twice. Having a home phone may at least give us the peace of mind of trying to reach her in another way. She's long hated her cell phone. Mom went, now you have a new phone to hate! Grandma may well get a newfound appreciation for said cell phone after all this.
We'd finished lunch around 1, 1:15; we didn't leave grandma's until about 4:30, and we'd still had an errand to run. Mom was all, do you want to drive around the old neighborhood? Haha, NO. I did not expect to have to drive home in rush hour traffic! Had it been 2:30, maybe; it's been a while since I last saw our old house. But my plan had always been to go to Rich's and pick up food for dinner. I can't not go there if we're this close! Plus, that's at least on the way home. We were there until about 5:30, then started the trek home, where we immediately encountered a train--and then the person in front of me randomly tried to back up. Hi, everyone's not moving; where the heck do you think you're going to go? We were also in the right lane, so we had a full lane of traffic to our left and then the sidewalk and cemetery to our right. I started honking at her, and I could tell she was flipping out in the car in front of me. She did at least put on her turn signal, so that once traffic started moving again, the car next to us was able to let her into the left lane--and she ended up doing a U-turn and heading northbound. Oh-kay. Well, at least she's out of our hair. And then a while later, after traffic had been moving really well on North Avenue, all of a sudden it got pretty slow and the people on the right started moving left. Yep, we have an accident. That tied up traffic for a bit, but past that point all was well. We got home just before 7. That was a much longer day than anticipated.