(no subject)
SERIOUSLY SOME THINGS IN THIS ARE A BIT ON THE GROSS SIDE, IT BY NO MEANS EXPRESSES MY PERSONALITY OR VIEWS AS A HUMAN BEING
**PARTS THAT ARE NEW ARE BOLD**
PART ONE: RANDALL
Chapter 1: I got Circumcised when I was Nine (DONE!?)
My mother was 15 when I was born. Or I guess what I should say is, she was 15 when my father, then a 19 year old self proclaimed navy man decided to drink a liter of whiskey before her homecoming dance and in a drunken fit of lust fucked her in front of her parent's house. She never saw her homecoming dance, three months later she found out she was pregnant with me and had to quit school. By the fourth month she had accepted that desperate times call for desperate measures and tried aborting me with a clothes hanger. Unfortunately, for her, she could only find sturdy plastic hangers. As much as she damaged herself, having only recently losing her virginity, she could not force the Sweet Heart brand hanger far enough to connect with my skull. By month five she had gone nearly catatonic from shock and being over medicated after having her business torn up. In months seven till my one month premature birth, which to this day I do not know if she forced upon herself, she began to act as if she were awkwardly excited about my arrival. When it had finally happened it was as if she were playing dolls, we lived at her parents house. They were kind people, the last kind people I would know. For three years I lived there, my grand parents raising me themselves and mother constantly medicated or performing her wifely duties for "father".
In days approaching my third birthday my grand parents decided to invite the neighborhood kids over and let me have a real birthday party. This was a big day for me. My parents didn’t believe in celebrations, or rather me having celebrations. When cake was being handed out mother exited the house looking pale and over caffinated. She walked to me at the head of the table where I sat at the top of the world finally. She ran her rough hands around my neck nearly laughing. Suddenly stopping she walked over to the shed across the yard. She went in and came back out seconds later. I was the only one looking at first but by the time anyone else noticed what I was looking at it was too late. Every head turned as she let out a final sigh then revealing the gun she had gotten from the shed she put the gun in her mouth and pulled the trigger, making the once youthful head she had on her shoulders seemingly disappear. I watched on as if nothing had happened, I was completely apathetic about the situation as if I knew already the horrible things she did to me. Pre and post birth. I shook the image out of my head and requested my cake so I could eat it too.
It only took days before my father had us on the road and out of my grandparent’s house. We drove for a day till we reached our new home, well mobile home. He had moved us into the cheapest place he could find to make sure he had plenty of money left over to stock the refrigerator with his life essentials, vodka and dark Canadian beer.
Knowing at such a young age that I was the only person that would raise me I began to steal and sneak food into my room to have my one square meal a day, if I was lucky. Most days it was easy to get my snacks by father, who usually by 6:00PM on the dot was passed out covered in his own drool and vomit. By the time I was six I became quite the good thief learning to steal money which by this point we were fresh out of. I decided that I would keep the money I stole and save for a future of my own one day. I saved till the time I was nine, I had decided long ago ten was the right age to be on my own. My plans were abruptly crushed by my father in a rage if sobriety. I had been eating a small pouch of peanuts I got from the family next door. Being as starved as I was I wasn’t careful enough when eating them. My father woke up from his selfenduced vodka coma, clear eyed for the first time in months. He was taking a walk to the beer chest when he stepped on remnants of a peanut shell I had dropped on the floor. He came through my door like a wild animal to see me counting my treasure and eating my breakfast, lunch, and diner all in one. He said nothing; instead he grabbed me by my uncut hair and dragged me to the timeout chair, an old ripped up lazy boy chair that he purposely would urinate on before seating me in to make my punishment that much worse. But today he had more energy and decided I needed a better punishment. He threw me to the ground and began to kick me in the chest and face, I can still remember each time his feet bludgeoned my skull. When his legs got worn out he told me to get on my hands and knees. I didn’t need to see what he was doing, not as if I could, with my eyes being blocked by my own blood. I could hear him taking his belt off then say “this better teach you, you little mistake.” Then next thing I knew I was being pummeled by what felt like a metal poll, but in actuality he was just beating me with the metal size setter his belt had on it, I could feel the two inches of steel cutting into my back and sides. When he finally he finished he seated me in the lazy boy. After all that had happened I was just happy he didn’t piss on the seat first, that was when I felt a wet burning sensation over my whole body. I gathered all the strength I could to open my eyes, when I did all I saw was him standing over me. Sipping a bottle of liquor and urinating directly on me, not forgetting to get my cuts. When he was bored with his vodka he poured the rest on me and told me that if I was going to cry like a little girl he’d show me what happens to crying little girls. He threw my to the ground by my throat and proceeded to rip my pants off of me and turn me on my stomach. I remember vividly feeling him enter me, seconds later I blacked out. When I woke up the next day I was covered in a cocktail of piss, alcohol, blood, sweat and cum. I was able to open my eyes but I really wished I was dead, I could see him, his back to me several feet away in his tool box digging around. I couldn’t imagine what he was looking for till he walked over with a pair of pliers and an exacto knife. He ran his fingers through my hair passionately, almost as if he had a new found appreciation in me after violating me. He began to speak to me, not yell actually speak to me, I felt a hint of comfort for a second that was ripped away when I deciphered his words. “I hope you enjoyed last night almost as much as me.” he kissed me on my forehead and licked his lips, almost enjoying the taste of my blood and his semen. “I couldn’t help but noticed that your slut mother never got you circumcised, but you need not worry about that, Daddy will take care of it for you.” All the adrenalin I had rushed to my brain, I tried kicking him away but it was no use. He punched me once in the temple to get me dazed enough to not move, but still know what was going on. Then using his old rusted pliers he grabbed the tip of my child dick and pulled it out as far as he could to make his next step easier. Then with a smile on his face he ran his exaco knife around the crown taking my foreskin and tip of my penis with him. He held the blood soaked skin in front of my crying eyes then still laughing he forced them into my mouth. This was the closest thing to a meal my father ever gave me. I laid in that spot for what seemed like an eternity. I finally sat up the next day to discover that a considerable portion of my already child sized penis had been removed.
Ummm, that's chapter one.