Fiber Does a Body Good
Dear Poop Diary,
I just had a decent poop. It was pretty quick. I was in there for about 5 minutes, including wiping. I had the pleasure of having Jeff Goldblum watch me, which was pretty exciting. It was pretty hard, actually coming out in 4 different pieces. I think I need to eat more fiber to make that a little smoother, but it was a pretty nice poop. It was an easy clean-up, only taking 3 wipes again. For the record, Erin Coogan is a fucking liar for claiming she never uses three wipes. Anyone that uses less than 3 wipes per poop has a self-cleaning ass. I don't care how hard that poop came out, that's impossible. Also, since we're on the topic, Coogan and Meagan claim they have never clogged the toilet. I just want the world to know that is a blatant lie. I clog the toilet at least once a month, although I've been doing pretty good at school this year. Let's give some props to Matthew Vincent Russo for being the first to clog the toilet this year. It was a pretty disgusting poop. Good work, Russo.
Back to my poop, it was minimally smelly. A very nice and relaxing poop that was clean, scentless, and pretty damn enjoyable. I'll give it a 7 on my poop-o-meter on account of its hardness and coming out in different parts. A little bit of a smoother of a poop and that had some 10 potential.
Keep giving your toilet seat lots of ass.
Mike
I just had a decent poop. It was pretty quick. I was in there for about 5 minutes, including wiping. I had the pleasure of having Jeff Goldblum watch me, which was pretty exciting. It was pretty hard, actually coming out in 4 different pieces. I think I need to eat more fiber to make that a little smoother, but it was a pretty nice poop. It was an easy clean-up, only taking 3 wipes again. For the record, Erin Coogan is a fucking liar for claiming she never uses three wipes. Anyone that uses less than 3 wipes per poop has a self-cleaning ass. I don't care how hard that poop came out, that's impossible. Also, since we're on the topic, Coogan and Meagan claim they have never clogged the toilet. I just want the world to know that is a blatant lie. I clog the toilet at least once a month, although I've been doing pretty good at school this year. Let's give some props to Matthew Vincent Russo for being the first to clog the toilet this year. It was a pretty disgusting poop. Good work, Russo.
Back to my poop, it was minimally smelly. A very nice and relaxing poop that was clean, scentless, and pretty damn enjoyable. I'll give it a 7 on my poop-o-meter on account of its hardness and coming out in different parts. A little bit of a smoother of a poop and that had some 10 potential.
Keep giving your toilet seat lots of ass.
Mike