BaCk To SqUaRe OnE.........
Last night, I sat around the house not really doin much and watched a few movies. I didn't even leave the safety of my own home until well after seven oclock in the evenin. When I finally left I went over to Nikki's house. Nikki, wow what a girl. It's amazing how confusing and indecisive one girl can be and how confused she can make me. I watched "Bourne Supremecy" with her and her parents. I have so much fun when I'm with her, yet as soon as we're apart everything changes. In person she is awesome, but on the phone and whatnot she becomes so different. I can't read her and its so confusing to even try. She plays a "hot and cold" game and it's kinda depressing to the point where I'm not sure what I'm doing is gonna be worth it in the end. But I enjoy the attention and it's something I haven't had for a long time, so I put in the back of mind and enjoy the time we spend together and don't let the other stuff get to me -which is amazingly hard-. I love making someone happy and it makes me happy knowing I get the chance to do really nice things for her and make her life better. I say all the nicest things, do all the nicest stuff yet it's getting me nowhere. She's a crazy girl with a crazy past and I was willing to put that all behind us and concentrate on the present and future, but even that wasn't good enough. Nothing I do is enough for her. She's not looking for what I'm offering, which is more than just friends, so I guess that's all we will be. It definately sucks because now I am back as square one...alone.