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HEY YOU!
Are you bored yet? Want to show off your skills? Want to battle a TRUE HERO (tm)? Then look no further then.
HANAKO'S KIDNAPPING VICTIM SHOP!
Need a damsle in distress to make a hero appear? We provide a victim for a low, low cost and you get to boost your levels and your ego by beating up a TRUE HERO (tm). Just look at some of our happy customers!
I was down in a rut and I needed payback. I decided to use her services for a quick and easy kidnapping victim, and DID IT EVER WORK. It only took half a day later and I was face to face with him [TRUE HERO (tm)]."
If you order your special willing kidnapping victim now, you can choose to have the TRUE HERO (tm) come in his very own PRISM BLACK costume, no extra charge. Order now and show the world how BAD you can be and get results FAST!
Warning, prices may change anytime during the kidnapping. You are not guarantied to win, in fact, you're gonna get your ass kicked, hard. Hanako may and probably will backstab you... with a real knife. Quotes may have been modified for selling purposes. Void in Quebec and Puerto Rico.
((So Hanako is putting up these signs all over the Island. The strikeouts are the very, very, very, very fine print, so, unless you have really, really good vision, you can't read it.))