Last Days F#%kery and The Vent
So it's my last week of teaching at a university, and I'm anticipating a big upwelling of some sort of feels.
I got nothing.
Unless you count the frustration.
I have to say this kind of reminds me of the first time I let there be sex with a new partner after being married for over two decades. I planned ahead for an emotional shit storm that never arrived. Sort of anticlimactic. But I guess the tears and screaming had all come out in the time before the split.
The frustration? Comes from the endless repetition of the same old shit to different people. Oh, and the constant finger of blame I get from these 19 year-olds for their performance.
If you slept in class every day for the last 15 weeks, don't come cry to me that you've been been working SO hard and you can't understand why your performance is just "average". Consider yourself lucky, Son.
If you bombed the second midterm because you had a 103 temp and tried to share your strep throat with us, of course I let you retake the exam. I still counseled you that your performance had to change if the first score was less about your crud and more about your understanding. I let you make that call. Your score after the retake went up 50 points. Now the third midterm is back in the toilet, and you are insisting that *I* counseled you to stay in the class instead of dropping?! Oh, fuck no. Take that river you're crying elsewhere, Kid. In fact, drop it in Egypt, because that's where de Nile goes. Evidence suggests that a repeat of the test and an additional week or two to study can give you the performance you need to pass, and your conclusion is it's all my fault you're even still in class?! No.
If you want above average performance, yet can't pull that off in the time allowed, don't complain to me that the tests are too hard or that you need more time to do well. Plenty of others took the same exam with the same time constraints and turned in the damned key. If you want above average performance, then have an above average preparation. Period.
If you want to claim that you comprehend the material more than the tests demonstrate, then be able to answer my questions (especially the leading ones) that will help me give you the benefit of the doubt. When you can't, and I point it out to you--own it. You don't understand what you think you do.
There. I feel better now. Maybe none of them will die when the next few try the same tactics on me this afternoon. Maybe.
It would be a shame to leave the university in handcuffs because I delivered a braining to some well-deserving candidate. Enlightenment can be delivered with the end of a cane, can't it? Or am I thinking of Tai Kwan Leap?
I got nothing.
Unless you count the frustration.
I have to say this kind of reminds me of the first time I let there be sex with a new partner after being married for over two decades. I planned ahead for an emotional shit storm that never arrived. Sort of anticlimactic. But I guess the tears and screaming had all come out in the time before the split.
The frustration? Comes from the endless repetition of the same old shit to different people. Oh, and the constant finger of blame I get from these 19 year-olds for their performance.
If you slept in class every day for the last 15 weeks, don't come cry to me that you've been been working SO hard and you can't understand why your performance is just "average". Consider yourself lucky, Son.
If you bombed the second midterm because you had a 103 temp and tried to share your strep throat with us, of course I let you retake the exam. I still counseled you that your performance had to change if the first score was less about your crud and more about your understanding. I let you make that call. Your score after the retake went up 50 points. Now the third midterm is back in the toilet, and you are insisting that *I* counseled you to stay in the class instead of dropping?! Oh, fuck no. Take that river you're crying elsewhere, Kid. In fact, drop it in Egypt, because that's where de Nile goes. Evidence suggests that a repeat of the test and an additional week or two to study can give you the performance you need to pass, and your conclusion is it's all my fault you're even still in class?! No.
If you want above average performance, yet can't pull that off in the time allowed, don't complain to me that the tests are too hard or that you need more time to do well. Plenty of others took the same exam with the same time constraints and turned in the damned key. If you want above average performance, then have an above average preparation. Period.
If you want to claim that you comprehend the material more than the tests demonstrate, then be able to answer my questions (especially the leading ones) that will help me give you the benefit of the doubt. When you can't, and I point it out to you--own it. You don't understand what you think you do.
There. I feel better now. Maybe none of them will die when the next few try the same tactics on me this afternoon. Maybe.
It would be a shame to leave the university in handcuffs because I delivered a braining to some well-deserving candidate. Enlightenment can be delivered with the end of a cane, can't it? Or am I thinking of Tai Kwan Leap?